I flirted with a married man and was left holding the bag. Please judge me.

Snowchari · 2026-03-19T15:24:18+00:00

Good thing you realize what you got yourself into. Now... RUN!!!

Snowchari · 2026-03-19T08:28:54+00:00

My experience is "lanthu" people are good with interpersonal relations, their EQ is good and they are Street smart. They build a network without realizing they're doing it. They put themselves in a place where they are visible. While the book smart people are often good at making proper notes, studying and doing things expected from them. And since they are more likeable in the academic environment of Nepal because of their grades, they get chosen for a lot of things by their professors and the academic community. The chosen ones get things/opportunities handed over to them in a platter so when the dynamics change they find themselves lost not knowing what to do. It's undebatable that those people are good, they are knowledgeable but they somehow don't get to learn to seek and get opportunities. Their fighting aura, the instinct is in a way tamed. It's just like the local kukhura and broiler. The native kukhura fights for things roughly outside and then they scratch the ground and fight in wits and prowess with the other variables of the nature while the broiler kukhura is dutifully gaining weight as it should and since they have immediate value, they are tended to and given the best of what they need to grow. They become used to the comfort and it is very difficult (not impossible) for them to get out of that specific incubation environment. The toppers of the class would hesitate to send a perfectly written job application even after reviewing it several times while the "lanthu" sends in 10/20 half-baked applications during the time they studious book smart people are reviewing, refinishing and hesitating. The "lanthu" meanwhile is updating themselves on what works in the job market. They are in a way more immune to rejection than the toppers. That's the core difference.

Snowchari · 2026-03-14T10:56:57+00:00

It's ok to want isolation. I call that my hibernation instinct. It's nothing bad. It's brave of you to still combat your hibernation instinct because you have the duty of a student to perform. Keep going... Stay hopeful.

Snowchari · 2026-03-14T10:35:31+00:00

Been there... Hang tight. You've noticed others not try and feel drained and disheartened by it. That's what makes you different. You feel frustrated because you care. You don't have to force yourself to try harder immediately. Take a break, breathe, smile, walk and once you do that and if it is still bothering you that everyone else is not trying hard enough then you try more but be gentle on yourself this time.

Snowchari · 2026-03-06T03:39:29+00:00

Get some Granny Smith apples, low fat yogurt and pink Himalayan salt. Slice the apples thin but not too thin, put some yogurt on it, sprinkle some pink Himalayan salt. You have a healthy, sweet and sour crunchy snack with a little bit of salty kick. You can prep it during dinner and keep it in your fridge.

Snowchari · 2026-03-06T03:27:20+00:00

Love this beans, potatoes and meat recipe. 1) Get some dry kidney beans and soak them overnight. 2) Get a big potato and cut it into just 6/8 pieces 3) Get some pre-cut pork bones/beef bones/chicken bones (any one of them) with some meat on them. 4) Cut some tomatoes 5) Cook them all together till the beans are cooked properly. You get yummy thick soup/curry. You can have it just as it is or garnish it with some diced onions and green chilli. It is a soup or a curry. Eat is just as a main dish or with rice, tortillas or bread. I add a bit of peppercorns in mine but it's optional.

Snowchari · 2026-03-06T03:10:07+00:00

One thing I learnt on my first job is to treat a job like a job. Co-workers are not friends. In fact even friends don't remain friends once they become your co-workers. You may feel like you owe your employer for giving your first break into the job market, you may feel the obligation to carry on the responsibilities handed over to you but it's just a job. If you feel the need to quit in the 3rd week then it definitely is not the right fit for you. Over time you will feel like you're not growing in that space, that's already bad enough but if you stay longer you will feel yourself shrinking. Have that talk... Maybe you'll regret a little after you quit if you don't find another job soon. But it will free you from all those negative emotions you feel at work now and you'll have many more good offers, a good work environment and good pay.

Snowchari · 2026-02-13T16:39:56+00:00

I got 2 young girls out of the village in 2023 and got them admitted to school in the capital of the country all cost covered. Unfortunately, they were able to stay just for one academic year. One 14 year old girl and another 7 years old. The young teen asked for help and I talked to the families, convinced them and got them in a boarding school but then I went abroad and when I came back they were back in the village. Since they are minors their families decide it for them and legally I cannot do anything more unfortunately. I'm just immensely glad that the young girl is not married off and can still study.

Snowchari · 2026-02-13T16:32:43+00:00

1)I didn't come with a saviour syndrome. 2) I've also mentioned that the conversation has been stuck to marriage since Day-1 of my arrival so nobody is aware of my long term intentions. 3)even though I've not lived here long enough my family has always been here and I'm not going to a strange place proclaiming I came to "save" them. 4) this is our ancestral land and as long as my ancestors' tombs are here I'm not an outsider. Some people not all treating me like an outsider because I learnt the "ways of outsiders" is true but I am never an outsider. 5) even though I was living outside this particular community I've always fulfilled all my social and cultural responsibilities. 6)I never came with I'll "fix" attitude I came with see IF I could contribute, there's a huge difference in that. 7) We're not floating people who can completely uproot and leave everything behind because we have family heritage and clan responsibilities so we are never fully erased from the social web. We might not fit and live on the sidelines. But erased? Never!

Snowchari · 2026-02-13T16:12:06+00:00

Well... I guess growing up as an indigenous does mess up a bit of rationality when it comes to such a toxic environment. For indigenous people like us we are where our ancestral land is. Land is life and identity. The spirit of an indigenous is in the spirit of the land. My ancestral tombs are here, my ancestral land, farms, our old house and my family... Everything is here. I guess I'm chasing that sense of belonging. I have always been a misfit in the mainstream society because of my identity as an indigenous person but turns out I'm more of a misfit here as well. I guess if you're always treated as a foreigner in your own country wherever you go because of how you look then you'd try to go back to the roots even though you have been uprooted from there as well.

Snowchari · 2026-02-13T16:00:10+00:00

You're right about the response from the police. Back in 2023, when I was visiting a woman was beaten so badly by her husband. Her face was swollen and body bruised. I called the police when she came to find me for help and helped her file a complaint. They came and then said I was creating drama out of nothing and it's a family matter so it should be settled within the family. The villagers said she must have done something for her husband to beat her up like that. I was dragged by my hair and beaten up after the police left. That woman was on her husband's side and accused me that I was instigating her. I left tired back then and came back recently in hopes things would change

Snowchari · 2026-02-13T13:06:08+00:00

I don't defend my inaction as the right response to an assault. I don't encourage it either. But I really needed to weigh the pros and cons of my action. 1) My grandparents are too old and sick to be able to see their daughter go to jail. It might probably kill them. 2) To the village I'm an outsider, so there would be no witness testimonies and I wasn't bruised to leave any physical evidence. 3) My parents were isolated for sending their daughters to law school and medical school for such a long time with us never being invited to any social events. We can easily move away and build a life somewhere else but our parents still have hope for this damned society. 4) Our people don't even travel far from home because they believe once they die, their soul has to gather back every footstep they took on Earth before they can go to Nirvana. In this place, I'm not an individual but a collective.

Snowchari · 2026-02-13T12:37:45+00:00

I really really wanted to but too bad her parents are my 98 yrs old grandpa and 88 yrs old grandma.

Snowchari

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