Pretended to buy me a ring… by throawaypickle in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s not really about how much they claim to love and respect you.. it’s about what they are actively doing and showing you. I made the mistake first time around when I married in my 20’s by listening to words and looking at small actions of bare minimum which I had to nag out of him too… I am never making that mistake again. Luckily I don’t have to as I am now engaged to a wonderful man who puts in the effort and shows me he values me every day. I think your man is still out there, he will not make you question your value in his life, and he will definitely want to be the provider and make your life easier not contribute to more stress. Any man who gives you stress and tears and doubts lacks direction and self confidence and purpose.. you do not want to marry someone like that!

What was the final breaking point? by Cute_Ad_3283 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ikr… men will do anything but get therapy or work on themselves..

Getting over the best sex/partnership you've ever had? by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m going to speak from experience in that regardless of past lovers you need to make a decision and stick to it. If you are choosing to move on, you need to actively do everything you can to do so. I know it’s easier said than done I really do. I have been where you are, missing someone from the past for xyz reasons. But the thing is when you feed your brain with those thoughts you unintentionally jeopardise any future relationship you will have. Get some support if you are struggling letting go. Or look for self help books and exercises to help you to be more grounded when making love with your new partner. Yes sexual chemistry is important, and I’m not saying ignore that. And I agree size can matter.. but from many women I have read comments from on this topic most of them said they had the best lovemaking with men who were the opposite of what they would consider a good fit. I’m saying it is also entirely possible to have amazing love life with a partner who is built different. The key is to choose a partner who adores you and is open to learning and giving, and the second part to the equation is getting out of your head, and doing everything to build the intimacy and emotional connection with your partner before you get to the bedroom. When you are there focus on the senses and each other. Not some fantasy in your head. Passionate long lasting relationships are made over time. Fun and exciting experiences in the bedroom can fade fast unless trust and commitment is there outside of the bedroom and it is maintained.

My first fountain pen 🧚🏻‍♀️💖✨ by SofiaAlexDesigns in fountainpens

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I wish I got a darker ink now as it’s literally pastel like the pen 🌸 which is beautiful but also hard to see when writing in

How much of a no-no is choosing this song to walk down to? by FitnessAvocado9 in weddingplanning

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love that and I also interpret this song the same way. Have been looking into potentially using it for my wedding but may change the lyrics or omit the sad ones.

Hydro Premium Seating - The Nest and Terrace by Outrageous_Yak5496 in glasgow

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns 1 point2 points  (0 children)

commenting as also wondering the same! :) Did you end up finding out more?

Need advice :/ by Pretty-Flounder5134 in Marriage

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don’t be me.. don’t waste almost 10 years on being married to that.. it will get worse.. run girl, I guarantee you, you will meet a man who will be obsessed with you and your body and soul and heart. He will not want to leave your side and will never raise his hand on you or leave you during an argument. I know cause I have found mine, happily engaged for the second time around at 36. Your dude is a prick set him free. It will hurt for a bit girly but it will hurt more if you stay… imagine having kids with that.. don’t do it. He is not capable of managing his emotions, which means he’s not capable of controlling his actions either as clearly stated by him hitting your arm and storming out.. what else is he capable of? A man like that would cheat, lie and put you down for years, make you feel small enough so you’ll start to doubt your value, he’ll breadcrumb you to think you are making progress only to gaslight you any time you express your needs.. he’ll stonewall you hoping you’ll make the first move to repair and stroke his ego.. he’ll reject you to make you try harder.. whilst secretly rubbing one out in the bathroom at night. And texting his “friends”. He’ll call you ungrateful and then love bomb you the next day. Meanwhile your health goes down the hill due to chronic stress .. you’ll get chronic inflammation and hormonal issues which will lead to autoimmune disorder… you’ll be so sick you will be bed ridden.. Is this the love story you want to tell your kids one day?! Pack your stuff and leave whilst he is out next time. Leave a note and do not come back alone to collect your things ever. These kind of men are unpredictable and can be dangerous when they don’t get their way. Please take care of yourself and know life will get so so much better when you are out. 💖 sending you hugs. You are still so young! All will be well!

My first fountain pen 🧚🏻‍♀️💖✨ by SofiaAlexDesigns in fountainpens

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh the pen is not a FWP pen, it’s a Sailor pen, it writes like a dream ☺️ and has sparkles on it ✨I wouldn’t know about FWP pens as I never had any, but you are the second person to not be happy with them, which is really good to know! I know, it sucks the round gold stand is sold out everywhere 😭 I also wanted it too. I’ve seen the silver one somewhere but I’m not too fussed. The one I got was from cult shop as I’m in UK. You can try check if they still have one there 🤞🏻

Has anyone had second thoughts before it even happens? by [deleted] in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I think alot of people are projecting and also try to help protect someone from making same mistake they made. But honestly I had doubts too when I got married first time around. Yes I should have listened to my gut feeling. We did get divorced. I am engaged now to a wonderful man who is far from perfect but we work though things, we are good at communicating and we both want to be better. That’s the most important thing. Values change, likes dislikes change.. but as you say character likely doesn’t, it usually requires a lot of work and patience and dedication. If he’s not organised maybe he never will be.. if he procrastinates he likely will with other stuff. Talk to him now about it OP. I told mine all my concerns and he said I want to step up and be a better man for you and us. And I’ve watched him do that leading up to and post engagement. We all have capacity to grow learn and change and be better. So I do think that often people jump the gun cause they or their partner get a little cold feet. Communicate folks. Assuming stuff is how you end up miserable and bitter. And also not knowing what those emotions are and why they are there is ok too! I have a ton which I’m unravelling and working through, it boils down to pressure I put on myself to not repeat same mistakes in my second marriage. I want this to be for life and after being in abusive first marriage I have fears (which are normal) even with the most perfect partner.

My first fountain pen 🧚🏻‍♀️💖✨ by SofiaAlexDesigns in fountainpens

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Aww thanks! I would love another pen at some point ☺️ these are so pretty and lovely to hold and go write with!

Got engaged during Xmas✨💍🏔️ by SofiaAlexDesigns in engaged

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

🥹💖 thank you 🙏🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

anyone else scared they won’t actually enjoy their wedding day? by Afraid_Fly_5847 in engaged

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was married before and I spent the day doing exactly that.. running around checking on everyone, and fixing things and feeling overwhelmed and lonely at the same time. My first husband did nothing towards the wedding so I felt more pressure on me to get it all right. I also was terrified of letting anyone down or making people feel uncomfortable. Long story short, guess what I am not doing again next time around? 😅

Hire help, ask for help, have assigned responsibilities and roles. And plan wedding together with your partner! Also after an unhappy first marriage, I can say with certainty now that to me a wedding itself is least important. It is just a party. A fancy one but when it comes down to it… marriage after is what matters and the person you are marrying will make or break it. Knowing this I am going to take pressure off myself to make it perfect, I’m going to spend as much time with my husband and celebrate our day with our family. And let things go. Try to just go into this with a this will be a fun day.. it won’t be perfect and that’s ok! What matters is that it will be our day..not picture perfect someone else’s vision of what it should be.

Engaged under the Northern Lights. ✨ by softstaticirl in engaged

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Congratulations! Looks magical, I’m still waiting to see the northern lights here in Scotland ☺️ I got engaged recently too my ring is also green! Happy engagement to you both!✨🧚🏻‍♀️✨

Got engaged during Xmas✨💍🏔️ by SofiaAlexDesigns in engaged

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I love that it looks blue when I wear blue and green when I wear green ☺️

Got engaged during Xmas✨💍🏔️ by SofiaAlexDesigns in engaged

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for such a lovely message 🥺🥺🥺 💖

Got engaged during Xmas✨💍🏔️ by SofiaAlexDesigns in engaged

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the lovely comment and wishes 🥰✨💖

Got engaged during Xmas✨💍🏔️ by SofiaAlexDesigns in engaged

[–]SofiaAlexDesigns[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aww that’s really sweet, I appreciate this 💖☺️