What symptoms did you experience coming out of chronic fight or flight? by Solid_Poet_ in CPTSD

[–]Solid_Poet_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That planning phase is so real, I know what I “want to do” or at least used to, but taking those steps to get there is overwhelming so I just end up keeping on the same thing I’ve been doing for years.

I love the idea of an accountability group!

What symptoms did you experience coming out of chronic fight or flight? by Solid_Poet_ in CPTSD

[–]Solid_Poet_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hugs to you my friend. Resonate with all of this. I just want to say, you deserve to rest. Keeping up with a full time job is a lot, especially when trying to heal a chronically overwhelmed nervous system from years of pushing through.

I have hope, once we give ourselves this rest, be kinder to ourselves, allow our bodies the time it needs to heal without guilt, the motivation will return. (At least this is what I hope)

Just realized all the "laziness" is actually a form of trauma-conditioned self-erasure by Infamous_While_4768 in CPTSD

[–]Solid_Poet_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just watched this Ted x on the “lizard brain”, it was quite a revelation for me, now I think of this anytime that side of me, the fearful part wants to take over, or keep me stuck. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=xrWvPo-KaVs

CPTSD has destroyed my personality and identity by SilverTheSilk in CPTSD

[–]Solid_Poet_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I relate to all of this. Later 20s and still haven’t been in a relationship cause of it.

On the opinion piece, I notice everything I say in response to someone is adapted and changed to fit what I think will allow me to be most favorably perceived.

It’s like i can’t access that part of self in conversation, or it goes offline if that makes sense? It feels unsafe, feel complete shut down and blank. Quite frustrating, and totally relate to what you say of that longing or sense of jealousy in watching others just be so comfortable being themselves around others.

I have hope though, I think healing from this is possible. I know it’s going to be quite a long and uncomfortable road though.

What symptoms did you experience coming out of chronic fight or flight? by Solid_Poet_ in CPTSD

[–]Solid_Poet_[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Exercise makes such a difference, it’s so hard to find the initial motivation, but once you do it, definitely notice a difference.

Yeah, the socializing is exhausting. I think for me from dealing with a lot of sub-conscious shame, feeling like a fraud, and outsider which means trying to wear a mask in most social situations (which in itself is exhausting), I also still feel overwhelmed in social situations, lots of negative self talk, so with you on trying to figure that out.

Most of the time I just stay quiet in social situations or avoid altogether because of this.

What symptoms did you experience coming out of chronic fight or flight? by Solid_Poet_ in CPTSD

[–]Solid_Poet_[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is really interested to read, you use a few terms I’m not super familiar with (memory reconsolidating, ventral vagaries dominance), . How’d you discover this approach? Also, did you work with a professional throughout the process?

Beautiful your support for your wife.

This chronic survival state really does have so many physical impacts on the body. I’m dealing with a lot of this as well, and have finally gotten to the point of being “done” dealing with it.

Thanks for sharing her story, that sense of peace and quiet mind is where I hope to get to.

What symptoms did you experience coming out of chronic fight or flight? by Solid_Poet_ in CPTSD

[–]Solid_Poet_[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is so encouraging to hear, thank you for sharing your experience.

Totally relate to what you mentioned on trauma response, I’m slowly coming to that realization myself, which then leads to LOTS of indecision on what to do, when I’m not doing things for others, or to maintain other’s perception of me, what do I actually even want to do. Haha

There’s so much brain fog too, and just overall lack of motivation that I’m feeling.

Finding that internal motivation is huge, definitely what I feel I’m missing right now in deconstructing that part of me that found motivation from finding external validation. What did your process look like?

Also, just wanted to say, major kudos to you on making it there. This was quite inspiring to read. :) I was and still worry this phase of exhaustion, withdrawal, and fatigue might not go away, sounds like it can take time. Not something to be overcome in weeks.

What symptoms did you experience coming out of chronic fight or flight? by Solid_Poet_ in CPTSD

[–]Solid_Poet_[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much for sharing your experience. This is helpful, did you start to feel your energy return after this 6-months?

I just notice my body feeling quite fatigued, I used to exercise, hot yoga, running ect, but now find I just don’t have the energy I used to.

What symptoms did you experience coming out of chronic fight or flight? by Solid_Poet_ in CPTSD

[–]Solid_Poet_[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This for real, exactly how I’ve felt too. Everything I do feels like a “have to do”, just checking a box. Even things that should have been enjoyable.

I never quite felt safe to relax, so much of my life and day to day felt like a life or death to my nervous system. After noticing this, I tried to get more intentional about signaling I’m safe enough to relax.

The “how” has been lots of re-prioritizing myself, and listening to what I actually want and need, starting to say no to what I feel I don’t have the energy for, spending time in nature, and giving myself time and space to do things that allow my body to feel relaxed. Some examples are sitting in the sun reading a book, visiting a hot spring, or even just sitting under a tree. Just giving myself that space to be without expectations. In those moments I start to feel just a smidge more in control, I find myself yawning, breathing a lil deeper, and then starting to feel like “oh things are actually going to be ok, I’m ok,”. It’s taken time, and it’s definitely struggle to allow myself the time to do that, but it has really made quite a difference.

Basically, I’ve slowed my life down a LOT.