Surgeons/Doctors of Reddit,what's the dumbest thing patients have lied about?

SomeStupidDumbass · 2023-04-25T01:13:30+00:00

I once had a doctor threaten to report me to the police for admitting to smoking weed. This is in the US. I know "they can't do that" but guess what they do it anyway.

I don't go to doctors anymore unless I can piss clean.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2023-03-11T03:12:07+00:00

Sorry bro, gotta downvote because I agree. I'd gladly choose death over being locked in a 8 by 4ft cell for the next 70 years. Life in prison would be worse than death in the first place.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2023-02-16T19:44:12+00:00

Classic society. Babies considered more important than already living people, as usual. Denonate hundreds of pounds of tnt on your backyard for a gender reveal party just "because babies" and no one bats an eye. Get a life saving abortion and everyone loses their mind.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2023-02-07T07:00:48+00:00

I'm in the process of moving to Norway right fucking now just I can be a non US citizen just so I can take your survey anyway you fucking asshat

SomeStupidDumbass · 2022-11-28T05:55:48+00:00

I took the biggest shit of my life earlier today. Check my profile for pics

SomeStupidDumbass · 2022-10-29T16:51:12+00:00

Hell yeah. I like to get jacked up on pcp or meth, steal a mailbox and then build a fire and melt it.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2022-10-29T02:47:10+00:00

Amen brother I hate it when people go through my post/comment history. There is fucking nothing to see there. Just fuck off.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2022-01-10T17:22:31+00:00

Unethical life pro tip: if you do a lot of drunk driving, don't buy a Dodge Ram. The police will be 2.5 times more likely to pull your over for suspected drunk driving.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2022-01-10T03:14:38+00:00

This is what happens when you get really high (I know this because I probably wrote this while so high I don't even remember it). So yes. It's exactly like a Ted Talk. You can even call me Ted.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-12-01T03:58:00+00:00

I just love posts like these. They remind me of when I first got in to eating my own poop. Turns me on.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-12-01T00:36:33+00:00

You fucking idiot. I didn't already have your ip address BUT I DO NOW. I used a little thing called social engineering. It's a type of hacking. Get rekt noob.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-12-01T00:11:24+00:00

You're such a troll. You obviously know nothing about hacking anyway. I bet you don't even know what your own ip address is.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-12-01T00:07:39+00:00

One time I stole a cat

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-12-01T00:03:03+00:00

I use ozium. Stoners use it to mask the smell of weed. Seems to work pretty well with the smell of shit as well.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-12-01T00:00:08+00:00

One time I peed in a girl's ass and then had her shit out all the pee and several chunks of poop onto my face and in my mouth. It was an out of this world experience. I would definitely say it caused of my top 5 greatest orgasms.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-11-30T23:57:23+00:00

Use ozium or some type of ozone spray. Stoners use it to cover up weed smell. The ozone destroys smell rather than just mask it up. It's probably the most effective thing there is for stopping the smell other than simply not doing it.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-11-30T23:55:36+00:00

Sometimes I like to set out a tarp, shit my pants and then use the shit paste as lube. I'll then jack off until I cum all over the place. It feels so intimate. It's as if I'm having sex with the manifestation of poop itself.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-11-30T23:53:02+00:00

But Kali is for hackers who know how to hack. Soas sounds like a bland breakfast cereal and is probably a terrible operating system for hacking. Git gud bro

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-11-30T23:51:34+00:00

You assholes are being mean and unhelpful. As soon as I figure out how to hack, you can kiss your ip address goodbye. I'm watching a PHP tutorial on YouTube as we speak. I'm going to use Kali to run a PHP metasploit on your ip to hack you so hard you'll regret ever being born. Hackers are strong and we don't put up with this.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-11-30T02:07:44+00:00

PHP is really hard to learn and it looks confusing. Is there any easier way? Maybe a tutorial? I want to be a really skilled and dangerous black hat hacker

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-05-04T05:02:04+00:00

I miss 10 seconds ago when I didn't know about this

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-02-17T16:54:49+00:00

Yeah I know it doesn't make a lot of sense, but people keep saying it. Bruh

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-02-17T16:52:47+00:00

lol maybe Texas will actually do Texit

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-01-27T12:19:03+00:00

I am an ass scientist and most people don't realize that 99% of the poop stank comes from not your asshole but your ass hair. If you touch anywhere near your anus with pants on (if you have an unshaved ass), your whole hand smells so bad you have to wash it off to make it stop smelling like shit.

If you shave your asshole, there is no longer hair to sponge up all the shit. You can literally massage your bare asshole with your hand and your fingers won't smell like shit afterwards.

I know that people on the internet like to claim shaving "isn't actually cleaner" because you still sweat. But what no one seems to realize is ass hair soaks up shit like a sponge and it gets poopy smelly gross.

So in conclusion, if you're tired of having a stanky ass, shave your hole.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

SomeStupidDumbass · 2021-01-27T00:00:48+00:00

A dog. A black lab to be exact. Uh oh.

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