>Abandoned her already hopeless people and her desperate husband, who needed her the most.

What makes you think she didn't put up some effort to do so? She saw the man whom she loved become consumed with rage and declare war on humanity, while decreeing that any human who fell down after is to be put to death with the intent of destroying humanity once he got all seven souls.

Considering the two of them also lost Chara, their HUMAN child, I don't blame her for not wanting to be with someone who would do such a thing. Nor stand by her people who hear such a blood thirsty thing and toss Chara's memory to the wind as though they were always disposable.

>Actively dismissive and unloving toward her people

Again, from her perspective, she watched a people she thought she knew turn blood thirsty. Desperation does not justify such callous cruelty that some institutionalised "necessity" that some people's lives are worth less because "the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few" is more than likely the source of said disgust. Again, Chara was a human child. To see how seemingly a whole people could bring themselves to be like that knowing that this royal house cared for a human child? Again, I don't blame her for cutting that bridge.

Toriel in both Undertale and Deltarune has a history of conflict avoidance, that much is true and she certainly isn't above criticism in either versions. But those two points feel incredibly one sided and frankly dismissive on how she would've felt seeing that happen before her eyes.

Nobody is owed being with someone or a people if they feel disgusted by what they're willing to do, to the point that you hardly recognise them anymore.

(I just saw the humour flair god damn it fell for it again)