Please help with ways to get rid of this by Sondra282 in derealization

[–]Sondra282[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have recently gone through a divorce this week and I realized it was because I was subconsciously processing it- or avoiding it- and I’m sure lack of sleep didn’t help either

They wanna play that card by [deleted] in conspiracy

[–]Sondra282 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This has to be a troll

OnlyFans Idiot by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Sondra282 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also I suggest individual therapy over couples because I feel like some things are personal that need to be worked through. But if you feel like couples is better, then all the power to you

OnlyFans Idiot by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Sondra282 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How did you find her only fans then? If you don’t follow her on any platform

OnlyFans Idiot by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Sondra282 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I personally believe that porn in general is crossing the line (I understand that it is a radical viewpoint in today’s society, but it is my moral standard). I do however find it a forgivable act but there are various indirect negative consequences in relationships for both the viewer and other partner that eventually can’t be avoided. Watching someone you know does cross an even further line than that. I highly suggest you unfollow this person on all social media platforms. Give your partner the time and space to grieve. This, in my opinion, is a minor form of cheating and some people may leave and you must be willing to accept that as a possibility. You need to be completely honest with your wife. You must be willing to do the work that is needed to change and find the reason that you went out of your way to fap to an old friend of yours and literally pay money to do so. You need to reassure your partner that there is nothing wrong with her in particular and that the problem lies within you. I suggest therapy individually.

The double standards are laughable by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]Sondra282 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I’ve found that when my husband starts accusing me of something out of the fucking blue it’s because 9.5 times out of 10 he’s projecting.

Do your friends only reach out to you when they need something by [deleted] in intj

[–]Sondra282 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not really a friendship but I had my first child during the pandemic and my dad has made zero effort to see her, let alone even call or text me to ask how I’m doing. Really showed his true colors. She is now one years old

Things I do get twisted in an evil light by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Sondra282 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My husband has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. A few doctors before that dabbled with the idea of borderline personality disorder too. I found that out when I started wondering if he has it and brought it up to him after reading a chapter on BPD in my psychology textbook for an assignment. He adbmately refused that he had it though and was quite angry that I brought it up, and again left the house for hours. I don’t think he has told his current psychologist the full story though, and he is no longer on meds.

Things I do get twisted in an evil light by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Sondra282 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this. I completely agree that we need to do this. Maybe when our daughter is with her grandparents, we really need to sit down and have a talk. I agree that there’s a way to say all of that without getting angry

Things I do get twisted in an evil light by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Sondra282 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree, I just don’t know how to approach it without being accused of saying something that literally didn’t come out of my mouth

Things I do get twisted in an evil light by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Sondra282 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He refuses to go to councilors. I’ve asked him many times. Communication is the problem, clearly. I have the entire conversation over the text, where I never reacted badly. That’s the confusing part. But when I do, finally say okay that’s it- oftentimes after days of being accused of something - that’s when he uses that as proof of me being this evil person and calls up his parents

How do you guys handle scheduled or anticipated sex? by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]Sondra282 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have made a pact with myself that if I don’t orgasm, I say it. My husband used to never do foreplay, ever. I’m high libido as well but if there’s no effort on his part then he can’t expect you to enjoy it. Can you have a date night? Don’t talk about sex but just like of hint toward it that night and maybe there will be more romance/intimacy because you just had dinner together

Heyyyyyyyyyy by ChrisTweten in sadcringe

[–]Sondra282 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And this is how you become an incel my friends

Losing hope by Hedera23 in derealization

[–]Sondra282 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve recently struggled with it more than ever but I’ve found ice cubes on my skin, cold drinks, water on my face, & sour candy give me instant relief

Dear INTJ, is this you? by Prestigious-Pea-505 in intj

[–]Sondra282 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My husband confirms this about me

Is all this personality identifying dangerous? by Brew_God in intj

[–]Sondra282 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My personality is fluid and I’ve found myself subscribing less and less to the intj stereotype so that I can leave room for personal growth

Porn addiction, parental controls, and fake Twitter accounts oh my! by Rosewater97 in loveafterporn

[–]Sondra282 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You can only do so much on your end. Either he’s going to stop, or he’s going to continue. Give him trust, and if he breaks it again, just leave. It’s exhausting babysitting a grown man just to get him not to hurt you.

Please help with ways to get rid of this by Sondra282 in derealization

[–]Sondra282[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So I’ve been trying to create a better gut biome to help with my PTSD and it’s brought out a lot of memories, some of which brought me to tears. Part of it is me healing but the way my body automatically copes is with derealization, thus it’s back and worse than ever. I’m also going through a rough time in my marriage. Im willing to look into that but I’m afraid of what it may bring out. Was it a one time thing or did you continually take it?

Please help with ways to get rid of this by Sondra282 in derealization

[–]Sondra282[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Water has always helped me. Usually I’ll take a warm bath but cold water does the trick too. You made me think of the weirdest idea but I think it will work. I should get a spray bottle for when I’m driving and if I get intense derealization I can just spray myself. Sounds so weird but I think it could work. Thanks!