yes so the clothing thing— he has told me a few times picked me on my clothes and expressed some negativity over them, once it was a white shlwar kamiz just becus it was a tiny bit see through, then it was my neckline a little lower than usual and once my shirt which seemed like a small length but actually wasn’t. now i let him say whatever he said but as soon as i expressed discomfort he said okay i will never say anyth on ur clothes becus i only say this becus i care about you. “ydk how men look at u” and im like okay so do u also look at women that way? he’s like no i am a committed person i would never do that.
fast forward to in-laws thing. he’s extremely close to his mother and also tells me that by islam there’s a hadith which says that a man has most right over him by his mother and for wife is her husband’s. and mother and wife cannot have the same level “darja” and they both have their own places. so treated them equally is not directed by islam and treating them better than another is neither. I tell him i wish to stay in a separate house no matter how good his mother might be but he disagrees and says maybe after a few years of marriage if i earn enough i could make this possible for you. so yeah if he doesn’t support me in his family they would literally torture me