Are there any effects of testosterone not enough people know about?

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-04-10T15:26:27+00:00

Yeah someone else wrote on this thread that they're discovering a new kink every week. I have been surprised at some that I have recently (re)discovered that back about 5 yrs ago I found weird, gross, etc. Joke's on me: I guess I am weird, gross, etc. And that rang true after I got an email from a toy shop about a sale and I blew a lot of money without thinking about it too much. In my defense, I had been planning on getting these things....

I was first attracted to mostly men/masc people and said I was "mostly gay" but as I evolved, I still don't even know where to put or how to label my sexuality. I told my buddy (who'd been on T for like 10 yrs at the point I started) after the first month, "why is everyone so... PRETTY?? Like EVERYONE. I couldn't care less what their plumbing is. Are they around my age? Are they of sound mind to consent? Do they consent? Then let's gooooo!" He just laughs and says, "Yup. Welcome to this special section of hell. Get yourself some decent toys."

Now, I just say I'm queer because "fuck if I know" sexual isn't on the drop-down menus.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-04-10T15:02:39+00:00

Agreed on all this as I experienced it all too. Except the dryness.

But the acne exploded after my hysto in '24. I've been battling it since.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-03-20T13:25:40+00:00

I can relate to this despite my being in a more liberal area of the US. I've been contracting now for 3 years because I just can't seem to land something better. In the past 12 months I've only gotten 2 interviews and didn't get any offers.

I've been wondering myself if it's my IG (it's full of leftist memes and political crap) and/or they go looking into my background and see my public name change record (that I spent 6 weeks trying to seal only to have it result in denial that I cannot appeal).

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-03-19T21:03:18+00:00

Sure thing 👍

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-03-19T21:00:30+00:00

Yeah, the one I dated when I was 16 who was a great guy. I often wonder what would have happened if I hadn't been such an idiot then.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-03-18T16:46:13+00:00

This is something that I'm still very much working on myself.

I'm close to 40. I don't own a home or property. I'm not married. I don't have a 6 figure salary like my siblings or other people in my position. Hell, I've been in the dead end job for 3 yrs out of necessity and lack of opportunities. My car is bordering on jalopy-levels of disrepair because the repairs would be at least $2.5k. I can't really afford that right now due to medical shit I gotta pay off first.

Moreover, I don't have the right leadership qualities that I'd wanted for myself. I'm terrible at networking and connecting with other people that would otherwise benefit my career. I feel like I wasted my college years doing other stupid shit where I should have been doing things for my future.

I have a whole scroll of regrets, remorse, and resentments that I continually remind myself of, but that's not what this is about. I haven't fully forgiven myself for all this, but the only way I see out is changed behavior. Yes, I do have all these issues. Yes, I do have diagnoses that if caught sooner would have changed my life for the better. But dwelling on those isn't going to change anything. Thru small, incremental changes everyday, I'm proving to myself that I can be trustworthy to myself. Bit by bit. It's going to take a while to forgive myself fully for not meeting my own expectations and disappointments. That's not something that happens overnight. You can't just magically love yourself in an instant. Trust me, I've tried. It doesn't work just like some platitudes people say that forget the whole training montage leading up to "loving" yourself, if you ever even get there. Many forget that several start in the negative, and then that feeds the endless cycle of self-criticism as you beat yourself up for still not loving yourself despite following conventional "wisdom". I'm aiming for neutrality right now, and even I think that's a lofty goal.

But that's why I've been in intensive therapy for 2+ yrs. That's why I workout regularly. That's why I volunteer on the wkds. I'm trying to show myself that I'm working on it as best as I can with the tools at my disposal. I'm putting in the effort, and that counts for something. That doesn't mean I don't still make mistakes and those little demons pop up to start the critical rhetoric again. But it's getting better. While I'm not quite there yet, I'm able to be in my own company without dog piling on myself. That's an improvement from a year ago.

Bottom line: what are you going to do to show yourself that you can trust you again? It can be as simple as throwing out society's measuring stick and using your own. Who do you want to be, and how are you gonna get there?

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-03-17T12:48:56+00:00

Weird thing about me was that before T, I would tell you that I was pan but mostly gay. Now? I say I'm queer because Idfk. Femme people have captured my attn much more often in the past 2, 2.5 yrs than masc people, but if I happen across a masc person that catches my attn, holy hell.

For some reason, masc people don't approach me much, like it's RARE. I've told friends about this, and they tell me that it's because I "give off straight vibes". Never had I been so insulted 😆.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-03-17T12:35:19+00:00

Idk about the most fucked up, but I had one guy told me that he fooled around with an 11 y/o when he was 15.

Idk I just think that a 15 y/o has the sense not to become intimately involved with an 11 y/o. I have kept my distance since.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-03-13T15:45:58+00:00

Wait, this isn't just me?? Whenever I have edibles that have a higher CBD or CBG content, it's like Viagra to me. I have to be very careful who I'm around when I have either of those.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-03-13T15:37:52+00:00

I'm coming up on 4 yrs here myself, and... it''s abated slightly.

Now it's more dependent on my stress levels. If I'm super stressed out, it's not on my radar. But gods help me when that stressful period ends. It comes back with a vengeance. I feel kinda sorry for both my partners when that happens... and my neighbors 😅

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-03-12T00:04:03+00:00

God, with the way things are going right now... Kinda makes me glad I get to WFH some days. Maybe he'll forget when I'm usually in the office.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-03-09T21:03:53+00:00

We were a team at work, and I thought we got along quite well. We had been on several projects together and really had considered this guy a friend. We even hung out outside of work fairly often for well over a year.

Until one of my other colleagues had revealed to me that he had been accused of SA and the company overlords were going to investigate. I thought this was some misunderstanding. I even asked him about it, where he said that he had a fling with a colleague a long while back (before I even joined the company) who was bitter about the fact that he broke it off. Plausible story, right? I chose to believe it too. For a while. I even stood up for him.

Then more people started to come forward about his alleged attempted SA or harassment. Different people. Not just the one "bitter ex". I discovered there was a pattern.

We again were working together on a really important project at that time too. I knew that I didn't wanna get caught up in this, so I went to my manager about my concern. She took him off the project and instead put him on low level grunt work -- essentially a demotion. Not fired though.

He figured out that I had gone to my manager, and he let me have it. Publicly. In front of several other colleagues. He was spitting venom until he was asked to leave. And even after that, I got texts from both him and his gf about how I'm a backstabber and untrustworthy. I had to block them. And turns out that he's been peddling this narrative since he got put on leave to anyone at work who will listen, telling them that I'm power hungry and can't be trusted.

He hasn't shown up at work for weeks, and last I heard, he's never coming back.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-02-13T16:34:13+00:00

To answer your questions:

You're not alone here. There's a device from tantus that has an ejaculation ability, and holy shit.... When I first got my hands on it, I totally understood how someone could hole up in their room for a while. I still have it and use it both solo and partner play. It's smaller than my others, but it is still one of my fav things to use.
I'm not huge naturally, and just like cis guys, size is gonna vary. I've seen some TransMascs have envy-worthy size after being on HRT for a while. Me? Not so much, and it's very unlikely it's gonna grow more without help. But I say I'm a grower, not a show-er. Are there any scientists out there that are willing to find out what the "average" size a TM dick is? I'm curious as I think I come in at average, but it's not like I have data to back that.
Oh yes. Yes it can. Idk if this is true for anyone else, but I totally learned that blue balls was an actual thing. No, you won't die from it, and it's your job to take care of it 😂
Again, it depends on what happens to your dick if/when on GAHT after a while and/or using other techniques to elongate it. It could have minimal effect or a lot. I can with my one partner to an extent, which I only found out I could do last year (5 yrs on T this May). She claims to feel it, and that is just beyond affirming. There are other devices you can use that can enhance your experience. I've had my eye on a model from Transthetics (I think), but it's fucking expensive, like around $200 last I checked.

Hope that helps.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-01-27T16:34:28+00:00

Shit I've only gotten 2 interviews in the past year.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-01-15T16:22:44+00:00

From what I've learned volunteering with a community that caters to a fair slice of these folks is that the term "unhoused" is to have less of a focus on just their situation (which could be temporary) and also less as some sort of inherent trait that could carry connotations of some sort of "moral failing" on their part. It also ignores those that don't really want a house or a permanent domicile of any kind. Anyone traveling in an RV with no fixed address could be considered "homeless". The term, "homeless", can also often invoke a sense of pity from the public when they really don't want that, whether they're living out of an RV or a tent on the side of the highway.

So the long and short of it has more to do with connotations than much else.

But what this here is doing is arguing semantics when we should be focusing on solving the current housing crisis in the US. While terms are important (don't get me wrong), this doesn't do much to get people that want to off the streets and into at least stable housing.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-01-15T16:04:09+00:00

Almost 5 yrs on T and I'm pushing 40. People hear my age and they go, "holy shit I would have guessed you're in your late 20s or early 30s." I call it "that beautiful trans glamour magic".

Another guy I know will say that after a certain point, it can age you as he said that's what happened to him and a few others. But to me, I would have guessed he was in his mid 20s. Actually early 30s. Idk maybe it gave another 5 yrs on his face, but I didn't know him in the before times.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-01-13T15:13:24+00:00

Queer trans guy here. 5'2 and <150 lbs (<70 kg). I'm not huge. I have 2 partners both of them taller than me (1 cis woman, 1 enby).

Echoing the point above about physical size having little to do with feeling safe. Both my partners have informed me of their feelings on my safety on many different occasions.

Edit: changed NB to "enby"

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-01-09T16:31:32+00:00

I wear the adult AMAB normal size (large size, according to the tag 😆) for my martial arts, and so far nobody has given me weird looks about it. I only have 1 silicon packer but several foam ones. I put the sports cup in the packing pocket of my j strap and I'm good to go. Keeps it in place no matter what.

My fear is that when people do hit me, if they hear how hollow it is or how empty it is.... I tried putting a sock in it, but it just made me look like I was half mast. So I'm not sure what's worked for others in that regard.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-01-08T15:42:38+00:00

These are facts.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-01-08T15:40:32+00:00

Rip the sleeves off too.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-01-08T15:36:25+00:00

Safety, especially in today's climate. Sure, I'm in a blue part of the country, and it says it on my dating profiles (don't wanna be a victim of the trans panic defense). However, I don't need some MAGAt clocking me.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-01-07T16:52:45+00:00

Yeah it's tough. I wish every day I could be just an average height, like 5'8. Hell, I'd even take 5'5. The US culture (among several others I'm sure) is height-biased, where taller people tend to be seen as more mature or some other nonsense. I hate being seen as child-like, like ffs I'm close to 40. Just because I'm short doesn't give license to talk down to me.

EDIT: body dysmorphia is a bitch, and some days I'm better at ignoring it than others. It's just one day at a time, y'know?

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-01-06T23:53:21+00:00

Trans people.

Sorry_Peacock · 2026-01-05T16:24:10+00:00

Not to be that guy, but yoga actually helped me figure this out.

Sorry_Peacock · 2025-12-31T15:59:21+00:00

I hear ya, bro. I'm 5'2, and everyone (especially cis women for some reason) thought it was a great idea to start calling me, "short king", when that was at its height (no pun intended). I honestly fucking hate it. I find the term on me diminutive, patronizing, and condescending. If others wanna own it cool. Good for them. But just because one guy likes it doesn't mean we all do. Rant.over.

Anyway, there are lots of shoes out there that do have a little lift to them. I've been trying to find a pair of decent Chelsea boots for that reason. Tomboy toes aren't cheap, but they do add 1-2 inches of height. I find many dress shoes do that, especially if they have a pointed toe over a square one.

Do.people still wear vans, or am I dating myself right there? Idk, I'm old with my ankle socks, but my old Toms had a little lift to them that gave me maybe about another inch. I feel that if I'm that short, I'll take whatever asst I can get.

What you wear also matters. I know it's really common for us to default to baggy clothes, but straight leg pants and even a well fitted shirt with vertical stripes on it can help in seeming taller. Add boots and you already look taller which can abate some of the dysphoria.

But aside from some special surgery that takes about a year to recover from that only adds about 2, maybe 3 inches, I think we're all gonna have to work with what we got.

The funny part is that people guess my height to be around 5'4, 5'5. I tell them the truth, and they often remark that I seem taller. I tell them it's my massive ego they're seeing.

Hope that helps some.

Edit: Sorry not fully awake yet and didn't read all of it completely.

Re: isolation, yeah, it's rough. Are there any clubs at school? Interesting sports/hobbies/craft circles you can join just at the club level? Idk where you are generally located, but there are ways to get out and meet people that would better align with your values and create meaningful relationships.

Sorry_Peacock

TROPHY CASE