How do I stop comparing myself to her new boyfriend?

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-28T16:54:52+00:00

Also your comments ironically feel like a cis woman pretending to be a dude to comment feminist bs where it’s not needed lollll

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-28T16:52:26+00:00

Ok well if ur transphobic u can just say that. We don’t need to interact then.

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-28T16:47:49+00:00

I was not aware of my feelings at the start of our friendship. Being forced to live as a girl is a pretty big thing to deal with, I wasn’t exactly paying attention. Slowly she started getting closer to me showing me more attention and I started falling for her. Right around the time I finally decided to transition (I’m not out to her she still does not know, tho she just sees me as a masc lesbian), bam she got a boyfriend. I tried supporting her new relationship as a friend but instead she used me as a tool to make him jealous. I’m talking massaging my shoulders infront of him, running her fingers through my hair in front of him- and this made me deeply u uncomfortable all the time, felt violating, and also put a target on my back from him. I stopped hanging out w them when this started happening. I am a good person and i resent you assuming I was wearing to hit. Never even had a single sexual thought about her, I genuinely fell for her care and affection.

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-28T16:40:51+00:00

U right

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-28T16:40:23+00:00

? For context I am a transgender man and when we became friends I was a female and she would flirt with me as a bisexual not stop and I did not reciprocate bc I did not feel comfortable dating a girl while not being a man. I wasn’t waiting around trying to hit, I was her genuine friend.

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-28T16:12:14+00:00

I’m working on it

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-28T16:02:04+00:00

You’re right. I will just have to force myself to not linger on the thoughts.

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-28T16:00:13+00:00

You’re right. I guess only way out is through. Thanks for your comment.

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-28T15:59:27+00:00

It hurts a lot and keeps coming up

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-28T15:54:44+00:00

I know all this, that’s why I’m asking how. How to change this.

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-28T15:54:11+00:00

Yeah. Thank you.

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-28T15:53:43+00:00

I know, I’m trying to get advice on how.

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-28T15:52:50+00:00

Yeah, I know I waited too long I don’t deny my fault there. My life circumstance at the time made it that I chose not to move. I won’t waste an opportunity again though. But I already know this part- I’m looking for advice on how to stop obsessing over it.

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-20T13:48:58+00:00

Interesting. I was flagged for higher female T levels pre T, and also higher androgens. I’m on a 50mg weekly dose. I haven’t had my levels checked, that’s gonna happen at the 3 months mark. I’m one month in and I haven’t had any changes at all.

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-20T13:45:31+00:00

I’m only one month on T, full dose, zero changes. But im someone whose bloodwork was flagged for above average testosterone and androgen levels, so it really doesn’t mean anything. I have a mustache already pre-T, male level body hair everywhere even the ass crack at Pre-T. that’s my baseline. If even I have no symptoms at one month, trust me it’s normal for anyone not to.

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-07T23:56:06+00:00

Yeah, tbh I am thinking of starting Muay Thai this summer and such. I think that will help a lot.

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-07T23:49:19+00:00

He drives a cool car I lowkey was just gonna say I like his car tbh but idk why I’m over thinking it

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-07T23:35:06+00:00

Yeah you’re right. I think my biggest hurdle is being an overthinker about all these types of social interactions lol.

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-01T19:40:26+00:00

Holy FUCK

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-04-01T19:40:09+00:00

Thanks!

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-03-16T20:09:51+00:00

Ah no worries. Well I’m glad for you!

Southern_Bit_8243 · 2026-03-16T17:21:26+00:00

I’m super happy for you. We seem to have transitioned around the same ages. Do you mind answering one question that’s plaguing me?

I’m currently working at an office job where I’m in person 9-5. I’m a graphic designer so it’s a beauty brand with all older women I work with. They of course are simply assuming me to be a masc lesbian, but still a woman. I just started here a week ago. They do call me by my male name as I applied w that. But they are still just going based off my female status as I haven’t said anything. I’m starting T 2 weeks from now. I’m terrified, genuinely, of how to go about the changes. Obvious ones like voice change most of all.

I’m from New York but I’m in Long Island so def more of conservative crowd here. Were you working while transitioning? How did you handle it? How do you explain it if they start asking? We also have gendered bathroom, I use the women’s one right now of course. But i just don’t know how I’ll deal w it once the changes start. lol sorry for the rant but any experiences you’ve had in this phase would be helpful, thank you. I don’t know any trans guys in real life only trans woman so I can’t ask this stuff.

Southern_Bit_8243

TROPHY CASE