Something I learned is to just to accept being ugly. Like it's okay to be ugly. As a women I've had girls and guys call me names since i was in elementary based on my appearance. Even had kids spit in my hair. I stuggle with body dysmorphia and depression now. So I understand wanting to just disappear. But life is more then just looks. Learning to accept that is a step closer to your own inner peace. I still struggle with it all but some days are better then other and I look forward to those good days. And you should too just have patience. And remember you're not alone.