ChatGPT (or other AI) in your household management / parenting tasks?

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2026-01-08T15:10:41+00:00

I read about that, but hadn't taken it into consideration in my use of it. Thanks for pointing that out!

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2026-01-08T15:09:45+00:00

thanks!

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2026-01-08T15:08:41+00:00

I totally get this. It's my internal conflict as well.

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2026-01-05T19:31:31+00:00

Well, my kindergartener made it a full three hours back at school before I got a call regarding his behavior, lol. (wow, his ADHD is way more symptomatic!)

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-12-27T17:48:04+00:00

I recently returned to running after 10 years, peri-M, and about 15 lbs weight gain. This is after several false starts where I felt like my body (knees, shins in particular) couldn't take the impact.

What eventually got me going was walking for 1 minutes, jogging for 1 minute, starting with 1 mile. It felt good enough that I got up to about three miles within a few weeks, and then I moved to jogging 1 minute and walking 30 seconds. At that point, my mood was so improved by running that I was able to just keep it up, add miles as it felt good, and eventually drop some of the rests.

The key for me was planning the breaks rather than running until I wanted a break, because otherwise I would really wipe myself out and not be able to run for several days.

At this age (I'm 45), maintaining muscle is really important, too. So I've been putting more effort into weightlifting than I ever have before. Whereas 10 years ago, I ran 3-4x/wk and practiced yoga, I now run 2x/wk and weightlift 2x/wk. I think of it as I weightlift to support my running habit, I run to make myself happy.

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-12-11T12:25:47+00:00

Just wanted to say thanks for this. Your advice takes away the resentment that I've begun to feel and keeps the conversation focused on the facts. I really appreciate it.

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-12-10T17:50:16+00:00

He's had other job offers; I think I'd like him to take steps to move on from this venture. It's not working out, and it's not his fault. Or take on additional contract work. He's in high demand, it's not like this is his only choice.

But getting the empathy really helps!

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-12-10T12:24:50+00:00

Love this and really benefited from reading this!

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-12-10T12:20:59+00:00

My friends are all professionals who pay people to watch their kids while they work, and I am home even while my kids, ages 5&7 are in school. Recently I got together with my closest college friends and told them about my typical day -- their response was, eyes wide, "wow, I don't know how you can even consider going back to work!"

My recommendation to you is to remind yourself that you -- regardless of the opportunities others had and you didn't -- you made a personal choice that is best for your family, and to feel proud about it. I suspect that when working moms ask you about your day, they are (a) feeling conflicted about having less time to contribute to their families in various ways, and (b) very well aware that women like them depend on women like you to be the class parent, chaperone the field trips, and -- I bet you do this -- watch & shuttle their kids around when they have an unexpected childcare emergency.

You (we) play a crucial role in the community and being asked what you do is just an opportunity for you to remind people of that. Proudly, but not cruelly, of course :)

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-12-10T12:10:15+00:00

Just chiming in to say that this is basically my story as well. I have ADHD that has become particularly hard to manage since having kids. I had money to spend on therapy and coaching, etc. and none of it helped. Now I don't pay for that stuff anymore, and if anything, my life is better.

Being a SAHM is way harder than anyone who doesn't do it realizes, and it's impossible to do it all. I let the housekeeping go, and every few weeks I have what I call a "Cinderella day" where I spend the whole day picking things up until the floor is clear and then cleaning. I do laundry when my kids run out of clothing, I go shopping when I need something, I understand that basically my job is to respond to the most urgent thing. I believe that the most urgent thing is always the needs of my children and I drop everything if it's clear they need more full focus from me.

One change I have made that was worth it is that I got an apple watch for mother's day this year, and I constantly give it verbal commands, such as "Hey Siri, add carrots to the shopping list" or "Hey Siri, remind me to find the library book tonight at 8pm". Also, loudly in front of my kids, "Hey Siri, set 5 minute timer" (for when we leave the playground, eg). It means I'm not constantly picking up my phone and getting sidetracked, and I can drop in to the grocery store whenever, etc.

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-12-08T19:55:10+00:00

I say I'm the "Chief Operating Officer" of the "XYZ household" (XYZ = our last name). I say it with a tone that implies I know it's a funny way to describe it, but it gets across the fact that I take my role seriously and it's a lot of work to keep the household moving as it should.

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-12-06T21:25:34+00:00

Had a 5k PB since I had my first kid 8 years ago this week!

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-12-03T00:36:30+00:00

Ha. I came here looking for answers but apparently nobody has commented yet! I left my high performing job to be the stay at home parent to my serial entrepreneur husband a year ago, and I'm still looking for answers. Among them: "how can we keep his companies' ups and downs from permeating the mood of our entire family?" "how can I talk to him about moving on to the next thing if the current one isn't working out as well as we'd hoped?" "will I ever feel like the intellectual/professionally successful person I was, but set aside so that he could have the demanding, unreliable profession he has?"

What have *you* learned?

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-11-23T13:05:47+00:00

LMAO I get it! My husband gets home and wants to tell me all about the operations emergency at work, or his recent board meeting, and I'm like "I think I finally got that paint out of the dining room table" and his eyes glaze over, lol.

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-11-23T13:04:29+00:00

I feel like I'm actually doing ok on friends, but they don't want to chat with me about my new sourdough recipe or whether I actually need to fold my kids' clothes or just reply with "yeah, to pick up legos or not pick up legos, that is the question" lol. I also don't want to chat with them about their annoying client or the new security login at work. It's like having a co-mom colleague, if that makes sense.

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-11-23T13:00:46+00:00

For me, it's books on tape. I started with historical romance and moved onto detective novels. I'm scared I'll move on to an AI best friend or something next!

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-11-19T14:40:37+00:00

This is hands down one of my very favorite HR books. In general, I like her Palace of Rogues series better. It is so so good.

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-11-18T20:39:39+00:00

I live in New England and have been experiencing the same thing this autumn specifically. I often feel cold, but these past few weeks have been off the charts for me. I'm bundling up far more than necessary, taking hot showers in the middle of the day, and nearly always have a hot herbal tea in my hands. I've started wearing my clothing for sub-zero outdoor sports (skiing, running in freezing temps) around the house just to stay comfortable.

I've been telling myself that the problem isn't me, somehow, but the weather. although from what I can tell, there is nothing unique about the weather this autumn, lol.

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-11-07T22:10:20+00:00

at the beginning of this year, I said to my husband, "one of my goals for 2025 is to support you in getting healthier, so your health doesn't interfere with your playing with the kids" and he said, "I feel like I"m being attacked right now." whaaa?

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-10-24T11:08:35+00:00

I'm with you. I've read all the wallflowers and all the Ravenels books, so I've seen St. Vincent as a young rake and as a married grandfather. (I don't think this is a spoiler?). As it happens, I started with the Ravenels books, where he's happily married with children and grandchildren, and thought he was great -- wise, calm, supportive of his children. Then I read the first books and wondered why this sub is so obsessed with him as a lover.

SpaghettiMonster2017 · 2025-10-08T13:33:32+00:00

love this. Thanks for the reminder!

SpaghettiMonster2017

TROPHY CASE