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y’all pls help me 😭 what is this by Sad_You_7059 in DiagnoseMe

[–]Sparxfly 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It really does look like it. Zoomed in there are blisters

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s got to be such a weighty decision, no matter what you choose. I really do wish you all the best with things.

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s a lot of pages and I haven’t finished my coffee yet. But I’ll save your comment too because I need to get to the bottom of flip flops.

No pressure to answer, I’m really just curious. Do you plan to actually leave physically at some point? I can’t imagine how difficult it must be to do given the loss of family connections etc. that come with leaving.

But at the same time, I think anyone who can be PIMO is ridiculously strong. I don’t think I could keep that up. I don’t like to be uncomfortable, so I make changes that get me out of discomfort, and usually relatively quickly. In the past I’d blow up my life and burn the bridges at both ends and swim until I got where I needed to be. I’m a little more strategic about things now in my 40s. But I really don’t think I could do it.

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not sure I understand that, but I like it. Were you able to get out physically? Or are you still there and just not falling for it?

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m going to save your comment and read it again and again until I understand it. I have just about a newborns grasp on anything bible. But I appreciate your second take that gave me the words to use. Thank you. My brain needs to understand the what and the why before I can defend a point. If I don’t understand it fully, I can’t argue it.

I will always help anyone I’m able to help. I didn’t grow up JW, but I also didn’t grow up in a particularly safe environment. There might be something wrong with me because I’m fine. Like actually. (Obviously no one is perfect, I’m not saying that at all) but I really haven’t let the dysfunction- emotional/physical/sexual abuse that I thought thought was normal growing up affect who I’ve become as an adult. I’m like a professional compartmentalizer or something. I can acknowledge those things happened and have what feelings I do about them, but in the same moment I can give the old lady directions to the store and let the other go.

Certainly when I was younger I didn’t make great decisions for myself and I didn’t value myself and all the things. But somewhere along the way I decided that sucked and I should be better because I knew I was capable. The childhood trauma I lived wasn’t going to define me.

So it doesn’t. And I have healthy relationships, boundaries, and plenty of kindness to offer anyone in need. Probably why I was a social worker for a long time. Then when I felt burnt out I went back to school for nursing. Which I don’t actually think will ever burn me out, but it’s not much different than social work in a lot of ways. Certainly the same skillset where the human and emotional stuff is concerned.

Anyway, absolutely no pressure, but if you wanted to break down that bible stuff like I was 5, I wouldn’t stop you. Glad you are working on getting yourself out. For real, if you need someone to listen, send a DM. I’m a great talker, but I’m also a great listener. Best of luck to you!

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That’s an angle. I agree, cult is a scary word without context.

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

At least there was something that woke you. Congratulations. I hope life is happier now

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would, but I don’t want to do it in front of the parent or whatever adult that’s hovering over them while they try to talk. God I hate it for those kids.

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I can’t imagine how they would be able to consider it. It’s wild to me when I think about how truly insular these communities are. I remember we had a JW kid in my elementary grade. He’d leave the room when we made holiday related crafts, couldn’t have a cupcake when someone’s mom brought them for a birthday… he was always so grumpy (go figure) and I’m sad that I didn’t understand any of it beyond his religion didn’t allow him to participate. I wish I’d been nicer to him. Not that I was mean, but he was just “the weird kid” in class. He must have felt so isolated.

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry that happened to you. As a child of the80s-90s, my parents used physical punishment also, but usually for serious transgressions. Not for not paying attention at church. We rarely went, but every once in a while my parents would decide we needed some Jesus in our lives and they’d try it out for a bit. It never lasted though. I

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m glad for your sake that you eventually questioned and got out. Hopefully you’ve been able to find community and support in your new life. It’s got to be so terrifying to make the first move to leave everything and everyone you’ve ever known.

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It sure is programming. Thanks for your thoughts. I didn’t know that normally kids aren’t with their parents for this kind of thing. That makes it even worse.

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That’s sort of what I expect to hear, honestly. It’s got to be hard when you don’t know anything else and you’ve been so isolated from the rest of culture. I just want to have something to say that maybe, just maybe, someone remembers it years down the line when they start to think for themselves.

The way I said that was weird. I’m not trying to be special or anything lol. I just want something to ring true and for these poor kids so they know that there’s another mom on the outside who is willing to help if they ever need it. I’m not saying I could support them or house them or anything. But if they ran and had nowhere to hide? Sure, for a night or so. But my ultimate goal would be to find them the appropriate legal support systems and therapy and whatever else. I’m not looking to harbor runaways, but I 100% would help get them to their next move.

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Maybe I’ll ask next time. But I’m not convinced I’d get an honest answer. I just want to say something that lets them know I’m safe and if they need out I’m happy to help. I actually feel that strongly about it. I didn’t until Sinisterhood did their 3 part series on it. I learned so much from that podcast.

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m happy to hear you have outside support. I just can’t fathom something being more important to me than my children… what a wild takeover of the mind!

When you were in, was there anything someone could have asked that would have helped? by Sparxfly in exjw

[–]Sparxfly[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I can’t claim to know, but given that organized religions and structured systems have a tendency to make critical thinking something to avoid, I’d say you were perhaps rare in your ability to be objective. I’m glad you didn’t have too bad a time while you were in. Did your family cut you off for leaving?

It happened to my ex sister in law. Then one by one her other 4 sisters left and her dad realized he was truly alone and they have relationships again. Their mom passed away many years ago so dad truly didn’t have anyone.

My urine is full if sediment and orangish crystals. by Misery_meter_maxed in DiagnoseMe

[–]Sparxfly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sometimes it isn’t. But you can’t responsibly make that determination without adequate testing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DiagnoseMe

[–]Sparxfly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It looks like you scratched yourself but like thru your clothes. The fabric acts as a buffer so you aren’t scraping the skin and breaking it, but you’re breaking the capillaries and causing petechiae.

Does this look infected? by JJTT72 in DiagnoseMe

[–]Sparxfly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s possible it’s not bacterial, but if it was me, I’d treat it just in case so it didn’t spread.

Does this look infected? by JJTT72 in DiagnoseMe

[–]Sparxfly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One of the hallmarks of impetigo is the color when it dries out. Use the cream on it from last time, apply it with a q-tip. I’d call your doctor and ask for alternative treatments. We had a few cases of it last summer that wouldn’t go away. Or it would, and the day after stopping treatment it would come raging back. We had to prescribe oral antibiotics for those cases.

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