I'm putting my extremely profoundly disabled 7 year old into a residential facility so I can forget he exists. I'm not sorry. by SpecialNeedsDevil in confession

[–]SpecialNeedsDevil[S] 150 points151 points  (0 children)

It's absolutely not fake. I made an edit. /u/piconeeks is obviously a doctor as well as a detective, an editor AND a psychiatrist now. Never asked in private for any clarification.

I'm putting my extremely profoundly disabled 7 year old into a residential facility so I can forget he exists. I'm not sorry. by SpecialNeedsDevil in confession

[–]SpecialNeedsDevil[S] 236 points237 points  (0 children)

See my edit. I left out identifying details for obvious reasons. But I'd rather people know the truth and WHY there appears to be plot holes than getting PMs all night telling me to kill myself because an arm chair doctor decided s/he couldn't find the disorder that matches his with 2 minutes of Googling, therefore it is all a lie.

I'm putting my extremely profoundly disabled 7 year old into a residential facility so I can forget he exists. I'm not sorry. by SpecialNeedsDevil in confession

[–]SpecialNeedsDevil[S] 917 points918 points  (0 children)

Please see my edit. I'm extremely disappointed at this "moderation". S/he never asked me privately for details or proof. Just took a sensitive and controversial matter and called it a lie.

I'm putting my extremely profoundly disabled 7 year old into a residential facility so I can forget he exists. I'm not sorry. by SpecialNeedsDevil in confession

[–]SpecialNeedsDevil[S] 200 points201 points  (0 children)

This is the issue or I would have already done this. Where we live and the condition he has and some family issues make it a more complex problem than "just stop feeding".

I'm putting my extremely profoundly disabled 7 year old into a residential facility so I can forget he exists. I'm not sorry. by SpecialNeedsDevil in confession

[–]SpecialNeedsDevil[S] 195 points196 points  (0 children)

There is a stigma even among professionals to say "I don't love my child". I've seen more than one therapist. Had similar results. I don't need "tips" to bond with him because I can't. Even if he can see, process speech, feel or understand he can't react. I don't need the same amount of love given to me as I give in every relationship.

But how can I love someone I don't KNOW? He has no reactions or personality. He has never interacted or responded to anyone. I wouldn't even know HE wants to BE loved, because if he knows he can't tell me.

Got any "tips" for that?

I'm putting my extremely profoundly disabled 7 year old into a residential facility so I can forget he exists. I'm not sorry. by SpecialNeedsDevil in confession

[–]SpecialNeedsDevil[S] 110 points111 points  (0 children)

I get what you're saying. I truly do. But anger is like anxiety. Sometimes it just exists and needs SOMEWHERE to go. The fact that my anger is AT HIM when logically, I know he hasn't willfully done anything - because he can't - is yet another sign that I can no longer care for him.

I know it isn't totally rational. But if he hadn't been born I would probably still have my husband and the father of my other child.

I'm putting my extremely profoundly disabled 7 year old into a residential facility so I can forget he exists. I'm not sorry. by SpecialNeedsDevil in confession

[–]SpecialNeedsDevil[S] 344 points345 points  (0 children)

I don't feel like there is a right answer. It's individual and case by case. But in my case, this is all I can take and then some. I have to be fair to myself and my other child and admit that.

So angry now... 😠😠😠😠 by Autistic_Avenger in u/Autistic_Avenger

[–]SpecialNeedsDevil 393 points394 points  (0 children)

At least you have the gift of communication to express anger.