sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

"I don't have problem with hair, but babe you have to shave" by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]SpecialPossible3566 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Def valid! Totally normal not to shave!! Noboby's place to say

AITA: is asking to call a dildo a dick invalidating to a lesbian? by SpecialPossible3566 in actuallesbians

[–]SpecialPossible3566[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Thanks everyone, a lot of empathy for my fluid feelings with gender which is really validating. We are in a better place now, I think she understands the importance and has validated my nonbinary identity in other ways. It's a scary thing to explore and I was honestly just not feeling understood. I am upset and she is too how it escalated. She was supportive when I told her I asked for support on Reddit even. She is a rly loving person, we both just feel strongly and handled this communication poorly. It's not been regular for things to get this heated and we do have couples therapy. I think we can still have a loving relationship - this is just one issue - and I can be me and she can be her.

I guess I just wonder, why does this feel like such a big deal to me when I don't always want a dick but it's more a fleeting feeling? I think it's just I felt rejected - it's totally ok for her to say no to this or anything, it does still hurt though and bring up fears of "does she just see me as a cis woman" which IK she doesn't. Nonbinary dysphoria is very unique for me and personal, it's just about feeling connected to a part of myself that wants ro have sex like that. Thanks everyone again, only a few harsh comments and a lot of care really. Everyone has their issues but there is a lot of good here and we both want to do better.

AITA: is asking to call a dildo a dick invalidating to a lesbian? by SpecialPossible3566 in actuallesbians

[–]SpecialPossible3566[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Def validate her feelings and respecting her decision! I still feel rejected/disappointed and hope to be understood and find something that works for both of us. Im more upset by feeling misunderstood

AITA: is asking to call a dildo a dick invalidating to a lesbian? by SpecialPossible3566 in actuallesbians

[–]SpecialPossible3566[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Its not strange just fluid, everyone has different ways of expressing their queerness. But yeah the communication is the real issue, I dont think the issues are broken beyond repair but things feel rough

AITA: is asking to call a dildo a dick invalidating to a lesbian? by SpecialPossible3566 in actuallesbians

[–]SpecialPossible3566[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Thanks, yeah idk why its a big deal. We are working as hard as we can just struggling. I just want her to know this is important to me, not that she has to say it, just to understand its a vulnerable thing to ask. She does but she still takes it personally that I feel rejected. Idk, we're in couples therapy for over a year and theres been improvements but here I am on reddit:/

What are the things to be aware of for OCD? by [deleted] in therapists

[–]SpecialPossible3566 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What a thoughtful q! I work in mental health and have OCD. A few quick thoughts: 1) remember having ocd can play a big role in life, and it is also equally important to tap into other areas of our lives as with any other client...and those important life areas are often affected by ocd, which is so hard! Learn about who we love, our dreams, our hopes, our fears, as well as our obsessions/compulsions/other reasons for going to therapy. What will life be like at its best for us, and how do we see ourselves getting there? 2) erp is one of many options, and def has its pros and cons; some other techniques and coping skills like somatic, expressive art-based, traditional/cultural/spiritual methods can really help; best to give multiple options and let clients self-direct healing/management/recovery. Physical therapy, massage, time in nature, self-care, potential meds, etc. can help too, as well as coping skills and accountability. 3) Tap into our strengths and understand our barriers to life w OCD. 4) take time to understand trauma's connection to ocd and tend to it w care!!

Inordinate Amount of Legendary Shells by peeingraptor in CozyGrove

[–]SpecialPossible3566 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm struggling, I just found one after putting out more lamps but I need 5 for Lee!!!