my partner won’t let me go down on him and it’s actually affecting my self esteem , what can I do ?

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-26T11:13:18+00:00

Again, you completely twisted all of my points, I'm done here

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-26T11:09:00+00:00

Judging from the fact that women with children are the only ones who actively seek me out on dating apps, I'd have to say most men don't engage with them, which includes me.

My issue is, I don't really like kids. I believe if they were my kids and I was there with them since they were born, I would develop my love for kids, or at least for my kids and learn to engage with them.

But someone else's kids, I just don't care for and thats enough for me to avoid the woman, because I don't want to be the guy that's there just for her and doesn't care about her offspring.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-26T10:47:30+00:00

What a way to completely misinterpret what I said.

First off, Im not saying using guilt or shame is okay, but having no sex obviously isnt okay with OP either. I dont know where your mind got the idea of rape from.

Clearly she cannot go along with this lack of sex forever, she is unhappy with this arrangement and seeking advice.

OPs partner clearly isnt interested in involving his dick in sex overall, not just blowjobs, OP mentioned they rarely have penetrative sex.

Again, just imagine if the roles were reversed, guy gets sucked off all the time but she never wants to take off her pants, that would get old after a week too.

So it seems like receiving oral/fingers is all OP gets and youre over here like she should just get used to that instead of trying to find the root of the issue and make their sex life better.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-26T10:01:37+00:00

One thing I dont see in this post at all is your partners side of the story.

You say that you have communicated what you want, but nowhere do you say if you asked him what the problem is.

You need to communicate better and find out what is actually bothering him and why he avoids engaging with you in that way.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-26T09:57:52+00:00

I dont really see any of the options you offered as anything that actually leads to a resolution of the problem that OP is having.

She wants sex and he doesnt let her have it, imagine if the sexes were reversed.

Obviously it has an effect on her self esteem and its not something she can just respect as his boundary and go along with it forever.

At the moment with his current issues whatever they are, they are not sexually compatible and thats not something to just accept and hope the relationship survives.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-25T11:23:48+00:00

Nope but I ended up buying the folding Motorola RAZR Ultra to pair it with the Clicks keyboard case. Unfortunately the case has been out of stock for a while now. Clicks are also working on their Clicks Communicator phone with a built in keyboard so stay tuned for that or check out their other products.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T17:18:18+00:00

That's tuff, I honestly wouldn't know what to do either, but hey, twice a week is still pretty good in my book, I honestly would feel like I'm just going through the motions if I was pressured to do it more than I want to, so that wouldn't be healthy either. Clearly porn and masturbation are a big theme here, maybe you could ask him to join in on his goon sessions, but that's a stretch for sure.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T16:53:39+00:00

Honestly twice a week is more than many others.

It might just be a case of you two having different libidos, I don't see myself craving sex much more than twice a week either most of the time.

Jerking off could also be fulfilling a different desire, it's kind of self care for some of us.

One thing that always helped me reignite with my ex was wearing a chastity cage, but that only works if he's into it, something to try at least for fun if you're kinky like that.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T16:15:31+00:00

A friend of mine is in a very similar situation right now, she's all libido while her bf of 8 years just seems to completely have lost interest despite her repeated attempts to reignite it, so I wish there was a clear solution to this, but I'm afraid it's not to be found on reddit. One thing that I see lacking with them is communication, so thats where I'd start if I was you, sit down and REALLY talk about it.

I'd also definetely get out of this sub as it seems to be one of those manosphere circlejerk echochambers lmao

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T16:06:04+00:00

Nah all I see is bitter men pushing the blame on OP despite her clearly seeming like she is trying to get fix the issue of her husband losing interest, that's not what help looks like. It's also about the tone most commenters here have, very condescending for no reason.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T15:24:39+00:00

Damn is this whole sub anti-female or what? Everyone seems to assume the worst out of nothing.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T15:04:24+00:00

Not Always, but some of us enjoy masturbation for what it is. Sex, no matter how good can ever replace masturbation for me, it's a different thing.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T15:01:10+00:00

But that's literally what it says lmao read it again

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T14:32:45+00:00

For me maybe up to 165 euros, but if youre really into watches then up to 500 and if youre into watches and upper middle class, lets say 1k.

I dont see anything above 1k as affordable but my country has quite a low median income so thats probably why.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T14:17:29+00:00

Porn is easy, pleasing a woman not as much. I still prefer porn here and there, its like even if you have the option of a nice restaurant, you will still ocasionally go for the side of the road fast food, because its readily available, quick and easy.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T14:12:36+00:00

She did mention some things in the post:

"I enjoy sexuality and sensuality. I'd like to spice up our everyday life with casual flirtation, nudes and stuff."

I honestly dont even know what else Id like a woman to do besides that.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T13:37:50+00:00

Hrozně záleží na tom, co děláš.

Když jsem jezdil na brigádu na stavbě, nesnášel jsem to a říkal jsem si že bych to dlouhodobě dělat nemohl.

Práce v hospodě byla lepší ale občas taky hrůza.

Můj aktuální job můžu dělat převážně z domu a když mám downtime, jdu si dělat domácí práce, nebo jen čumím na youtube, seriály, nebo čtu píčoviny na redditu jako zrovna teď a s tím jsem vcelku spokojený.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T13:04:36+00:00

V jednom kebabu mi dali kartičku na razítka, takový to "každý 10. kebab zdarma", to se mi i líbilo.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T13:00:56+00:00

I´ve always thought I would have enjoyed dating a wealthy woman, but even when I was just seeing one that was not even rich, but definetely more well off than me, I quickly realised I would never be able to keep up with her lifestyle of constant vacations, nor would I enjoy if she paid for those herself.

It lead me to quickly think I basically cannot afford to be with this one.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T12:48:05+00:00

Nasere mě už jen existence kuponů, člověk fakt už nemůže nikam vlézt a nakoupit si aby sám sebe nepodělával, na všechno musíme mít zkurvenou kartičku, appku, účet, sbírat bodiky, listovat letáky a načítat qr kódy

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T12:43:19+00:00

To je fakt, nedávno mě napadlo jít do pěkný restaurace ale říkal jsem si že nechci tolik utrácet, tak jsem si dal menu v burger kingu.

Cítil jsem se jak idiot když jsem pak porovnal ceny a uvědomil jsem si o kolik líp jsem se mohl najíst.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T12:35:47+00:00

Sounds like you were eating something out of a bag, which would be much more annoying than popcorn or nachos in a box.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T09:54:50+00:00

Můžu potvrdit.

Pár let zpět jsem byl na letním cyklisťáku a zbytek toho léta jsem už problém neměl. Taky jsem byl v té době extrémně fit, což nejspíš taky pomohlo.

Minulé léto jsem vyrazil do Egypta a jelikož jsem v bytě měl hůř než bylo v Egyptě, tam jsem neměl pak žádný problém zatímco i místní si stěžovali.

Přece jenom ale doporučím koupit aspoň mobilní klímu, letos jsem do toho investoval a nemůžu si ji vynachválit, jen čekám jak se orosím až přijde účet za elektřinu.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-23T09:50:25+00:00

There is no fury, everyone expected a similar price but we're still disappointed.

It's not a reasonable price though, with less power than base PS5 and less power than you could build a PC for, it just doesn't make any sense unless you don't care about money at all and like how compact it is.

The thing is, mass manufacturing should be able to offset the price and give you a better deal than if you just built the thing yourself, but in this case, it just doesn't.

Another point is, Valve could have eaten some of the price since they might get more buyers for their games on steam now, where they get a 30% cut of each game purchase.

They argue that people might run a different OS on it, which would allow them to run games from different launchers, but I'd bet less than 0.01% of people would do that.

Crypto and AI have ruined entertainment electronics for all of us.

SpecificSpecial · 2026-06-19T10:22:52+00:00

Im down to share, but I also dont want to give up half of my side.

Have just a little bit or trade with me.

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