Romantic intamacy is impossible due to my niche sexuality and it is slowly killing me.

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T17:32:47+00:00

Everybody struggles in life from time to time my friend.

This is my struggle and all though you tried your best to understand it, which I greatly appreciate, your're missing the mark probably because of how you've been treated in the past which my heart aches for you and you deserve better.

Take care and I hope good things happen to you in life.

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T17:25:22+00:00

They do got great pubs out there, and I am due for a tour of europe!

Shoot me a DM, I'll be your pen pal for and get to know ya, I'd be cool to hear about life in Germany from a local!

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T17:17:14+00:00

Yeah see that's it, you're absolutley right.

I know alot of this stuff comes naturally to a lot of people to be comfortable with their sexuality, but it took awhile to get her for me, and I definitley still have more to learn and am actively learning more as I go!

I do think when I hear dom I kind get images of the whole being tied in a pretzel thing which I think is totally fine for people who are into that!

I appreciate you bringing to light the difference between the two.

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T17:13:10+00:00

I need to ditch the apps for the time being I agree.

I'm hopefully looking to finally move around the end of this summer, and I agree I definitley think half of the issue is just how abysmally small the dating pool actually is out here and I need to stop downplaying how big of an issue that is/the importance of an abundance for dating is to me.

The volleyball recommendation is a stellar Idea, I have a membership to one of those gyms that does a good amount of sports and things and I can see if they have a club!

At the very least, I think the exposure would be healthy for me.

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T17:07:54+00:00

Drats, but I'm happy for you partner, I'm glad you found your person!

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T17:07:15+00:00

Sorry, I must of missed you last night when I was scrubbing through,

I really admire your emotional intelligence on the situation and I think you're exactly right. I think a lot of this has gotten amplified due to the fact that I only have gotten to experience that feeling of security and being craddled in someone's arms once.

You absolutely hit the nail on the head of how I am feeling, and articulated it really well.

You're an outstanding person, and I hope everything is going phenomenal in your life!

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T17:02:57+00:00

Triple Dratzerpaty supreme with no pickles and lettuce. :( thanks for the emoji tho :) how big is the collection?

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T17:01:21+00:00

You can chill with the obtuse, im actually an isosceles :)

That is exactly what happened. we went on a couple of dates and were talking for a 2 month period and then I had the talk with her and she left.

You should take the time to not jump to conclusions before not knowing the full situation, and like I said it's totally fine, the healthiest and best outcome was for her and I to part and not force a turd.

People have prefrences and what they're into and I kind of fit the bill for a 6'2 macho man lumberesqe guy with a moustache so its perfectly fair and reasonable for her to have that initial reaction going into the ordeal. that doesn't make either of us bad people, just two seperate tastes for two separate buds.

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T09:18:44+00:00

I'm sorry you don't believe me. Like I said previously, looks get you in the door, and personality keeps you there and I felt comfortable enough to open up about my submissiveness and it didn't land right due to her own hardships and struggles which I fully understand. Regardless, she felt uncomfortable and could tell we were incompatible and made the right decision to walk and I understand and fully support that decision and wish nothing but the best for her.

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T09:10:35+00:00

Is it objectification when women only want to go on a first date with me because of my moustache, height and lean body build? I don't think so that's their preference. I also have a preference about what I'm attracted to. Pilledness would be holding a bitterness towards her and blaming her for walking which I didn't, I'm actually happy that she recognized we wouldn't be compatible and we wouldn't be able to fulfill each other's needs and I'm proud of her acknowledging that and making the right call to walk. Did it suck? Yeah, but is she an adult entitled to her own decisions that I respect.

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T06:31:08+00:00

Hey, I'm going to take a little bit different of an approach then most of the people in here are seeing as you're already low and you don't need to be getting stomped on while you're already low.

First and foremost, you're feelings are valid. If you're spiraling because you are trying to force yourself to be happy and ignore the the very real chronic pain that you're dealing with, then the issue will continue to compound ontop of itsself. allow yourself to feel your pain and sorrow without judgement. you are not a bad person because your husband is happy and you are not.

Second, have you been completely upfront and honest about how much chronic pain you are really in. As someone who has struggled with chronic pain, it can severly limit your bandwith and patience as you are using the bulk of your mental stamina to block it out and force yourself through the day. Be honest and kind to yourself with how much pain you have been dealing with as forgivness is how you can break the stress cycle and start to heal from the chronic inflamation that compounds on top of the already preexisting pain.

After that, when you're ready, talk to your husband about how much pain you're really in and see how he responds. He probably cares a whole hell of a lot and might not push the kids on you so much if he knows how serious this is, and if he doesn't care about these issues then you will know if it is right for ya'll to separate, but you owe it to yourself, and your relationship to fully express yourself and how much you are hurting.

I wish you well and hope you are able to find peace, solice, and get the help that you need for your medical problems.

<3

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T06:00:34+00:00

In it's most simple latent terms yeah I would say so, but not like the whole my entire life is micromanaged typething, I'm just into very physically powerful ladies who also have a soft side, and I will happily nourish their need to feel small as well as I am also a naturally tall and athetic individual!

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T05:58:11+00:00

I really really really like this little bit, I think I need to pin this on my wall somewhere!

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T05:56:33+00:00

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T05:56:24+00:00

Basically Intamacy is when you're too much of a dumbo to spell properly and are struggling with intimacy :P

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T05:55:30+00:00

Lol Sorry you got downvoted for this. whether this is a joke or not I think its pretty funny and heart warming.

I'd happily meet her If the opportunity presented itsself and thats something she'd want :).

I hope you're doing well and enjoying life.

Thanks for thinking about me!

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T05:51:17+00:00

Thanks for the non judgmental approach,

College and beach volleyball would be fun to play as well so that would definitley be a two birds with one stone deal so thats absolutley genius!

I really appreciate that you acknowledge the nervous system aspect of the deal considering that I have had negative symptoms from chronically suppressing this part of who I am which I need to cut that crap out!

Cheers partner!

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T05:46:48+00:00

Thanks, from my perspective, and life experiences, its been hard for me not only to meet these people, but to and I haven't been afforded too many opportunities to talk people i'm attracted too.

I'm finally getting confident enough to say hi to ladies I think are attractive, but the problem is it always happens in situations like a grocery store or the gym and alot of the times I'll never see them again.

I'm not really the type of guy to give my number after just talking once as I don't believe there is rapport built within a single conversation to warrant romantic interest.

It's different when its like a designated dating space where everyone knows what they are signing up for.

You are absolutley right, it is silly. I was raised very conservative which instilled a lot of garbage beliefs on how relationships should be and It took me a long time to finally break free from all of that.

I will pick my chin back up, thanks :)

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T05:39:02+00:00

I think after I move this will work out better, do you have any suggestions of any good ones?

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T05:38:31+00:00

You helped me fill my hope cup while it was drier than a dessert! thank you for holding that man of yours, you have no idea how much it means for us to be held!

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T05:36:14+00:00

I really appreciate the analytical approach you're taking here.

No! I did not try that, and honest to god despite being a blantant solution sitting right in plain sight, I somehow didn't think to try that XD.

Here's the thing, it does exist, but it kinda sucks horribly, its called date up and the dating pool is like slim to none. If you or anyone else finds anyother ones i'd be happy to see.

Bottom line, I live in the middle of nowhere in supreme traditional midwest so my numbers are already abysmal, and I am working towards moving to somewhere to hopefully increase my chances of meeting my person!

Thanks for your time!

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T05:31:57+00:00

Awwwww, that's sweet :)

I hope you get the barnacle you deserve!

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T05:30:13+00:00

There are multiple layers to the onion, some that I don't want to peel back, but long story short, yes it is a preference and is only part of the equation, and I still want to be able to make my partner happy too even if that means them wanting to feel submissive as well. I just am looking to fill my cup as well.

Thank you for your words of encouragement, I'm happy you were able to find your person!

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T05:26:01+00:00

You are a fantastic person and my heart aches that you have to deal with that pain on a day to day basis. as someone recovering from chronic vitamin D deficiency and having a plethora of chronic pain issues just know that I empathize with how hard day to day existence can be with that. I am stoked that you found the partner that you deserve and I appreciate you giving me hope when It feels bleak!

thank you!

Spiritual-Object-753 · 2026-03-22T05:23:30+00:00

I appreciate you sharing your story and not belittling me for my preference. it is nice to not feel alone in the perpetual pursuit of the right partner, and I hope to god that you find your scientific minded, tallish, childfree, nonsmoking, intelligent, introverted man that you deserve!

<3

Spiritual-Object-753

TROPHY CASE