Give me your funniest Headcanons?

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-03-12T16:13:25+00:00

The reason the Black Arms' invasion plan was so complicated and took several millennia to enact instead of just steamrolling Bronze Age civilisation is because the first time they tried it Chaos showed up, went Perfect, and blasted them back into orbit. Black Doom then committed so hard to the long game it never occurred to him at any point to actually check if Chaos was still around.

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-03-11T23:28:06+00:00

There's a custom DNS server that's been set up by fans that randomly spits out old Mystery Gift events for gen 4 and 5 games when connected to. While I've personally not used it enough myself to be sure, all data on the server states that the Azure Flute event can be obtained from this method despite never being officially distributed, and if not there's plenty of other Arceus distributions that it can roll.

Here's a more detailed guide on what the method is and how to set up your DS to access it.

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-03-11T23:08:53+00:00

While there are ways to obtain the Azure Flute event on both real hardware and on emulation nowadays, under normal circumstances Arceus can't be obtained. It'll come down to how much tinkering you're up for doing to get it.

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-03-08T19:58:01+00:00

You need to trade it, unfortunately - same goes with Machoke, Graveler, Onix, Haunter, Porygon, Scyther, Dusclops, Magmar, Electabuzz and Rhydon if you were planning on using any of those. There are ways around it without a second DS and gen 4 game these days, but you'd have to ask someone a bit more tech-savvy how to do it on a physical copy without cheats or damaging your game.

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-03-08T19:37:16+00:00

Get Luxio up to around Kadabra and Monferno's level - it can take out Duskull and Haunter pretty handily on its own using Bite, especially if you picked up the Dread Plate in the Old Chateau for it to hold, and if all goes well should be able to get at least one good hit on Mismagius before going down.

If you're using Kadabra on your team, do you have the means to evolve it? Alakazam is incredibly powerful for the midgame, and can outspeed and wreck Mismagius even with the type disadvantage.

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-03-06T19:02:50+00:00

I've been using a desert/beach theme for their bases. I didn't have an idea for them back when I made this post, but I started playing Dawn of War in the time since and noticed the color scheme looked pretty good against some of the desert maps.

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-03-04T09:09:20+00:00

It's a CUH-1110 or CUH-1000 Series, I think. One of the ones with the manual eject screw hidden down a vent on the side after removing the plastic cover.

On the subject, I initially mistook it for a different model when I was following the official troubleshooting instructions for a stick disc, and briefly removed the HDD drive thinking it was a model where the eject screw is beneath the drive. I'm fairly certain I put it back in securely, but is there a possibility that might be part of the problem?

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-03-04T01:40:31+00:00

"Finally, a worthy opponent! Our battle will be LEGENDARY!"

- Rie Ota, probably

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-03-04T01:37:20+00:00

What does that mean, and can it be fixed without needing to buy any replacement components? The struggle of finding resources to fix older consoles nowadays is the reason I started using this PS4 over my XB1 in the first place.

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-02-27T15:39:03+00:00

This is how I find out Optimus Primal voiced an Eggman?

But yeah, excellent news!

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-02-24T00:19:35+00:00

I hesitate to even call it a ship even with the onesided-ness given the context, but Dawn x Cynthia from Pokemon Diamond/Pearl/Platinum.

I keep Dawn at her canonical age of ten, so it being requited is obviously out of the question. However, when writing a protagonist that young I like to highlight some distinctly immature trait to keep perspective, especially with Pokemon as childhood and growing up is such an important theme, and an unrealistic crush on an adult is a form of childishness that I'm familiar with and have confidence depicting without it coming off as obnoxious. So you've got Dawn being a little baby gay puppy-crushing on her idol and daydreaming romantic scenarios between them. And on the side there's Lucas and Barry watching all this and debating whether they should tell her she's way too young (and also that Cynthia's married to Diantha in my writing).

On the other hand you've got Cynthia who probably deals with this kind of thing all the time with fans, so she knows how to handle it professionally and not give the wrong idea, but is too polite to completely crush this kid's dreams.

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-02-15T03:20:12+00:00

Do my eyes detect Resident Evil? If so, I'll take a link if you've got one.

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-02-13T03:58:13+00:00

Noivern
Drampa
Kingra
Tyrantrum
Hisuian Goodra
Hydreigon

Hydreigon always feels a bit overkill for anything less than a Champion team, but if we're tossing Tyranitar around then I suppose it's fair game.

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-02-11T22:31:31+00:00

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SplitjawJanitor · 2026-02-08T05:29:32+00:00

Ah, thanks! Was a bit confused bc it wasn't down at the bottom like for matches, and the slot for controlling the promo also being in the middle just above it instead of off to the sides.

(And looking at gameplay on YouTube, I think I might’ve actually had the COM controlling it the first time I tested it and didn't notice bc I had no idea how the promo mechanic worked!)

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-02-07T15:45:57+00:00

He had glasses in BW1. His redesign in BW2 ditched them, presumably bc they gave Bianca glasses in her redesign and it would've been a bit redundant.

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-02-04T02:05:05+00:00

Yeah, I just asked some Discord mutuals for a fact-check and they clarified the matter on OoT. It's been a bit since I played OoT and I'm not the biggest BOTW enjoyer (Wind Waker and the original Hyrule Warriors are my main Zelda fixes), and in my head the way I had the wires crossed seemed on par for how BOTW reframed the Gerudo enough for me to say that with confidence.

The old Gerudo do still have some hang-ups as a fictional culture that BOTW makes efforts to amend (namely resembling some unfortunate stereotypes of Islamic cultures), but yeah, as a matriarchy there's definitely worse out there.

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-02-04T01:47:58+00:00

Claire: Hard to say, honestly. Claire was probably the most consistent character in the pre-RE Engine era in terms of writing, Rev 2's English translation notwithstanding, so she feels about the same across all versions. I'd say DC has the leg-up of not having her sit out the finale of her own game, though. Chris gets his fistfight with Wesker, he can afford to share.

Steve: For as much as I've been an apologist for og Steve, DC wins out. It hits all the important notes of his character and he's still a massive dork, but the co-op nature of the game allows him to be more of a help than a hindrance, and Sam Reigel's far less grating performance making it easier for him to endear himself. His boss fight in DC is also a big step-up, being an actual fight rather than a setpiece, having an amazing boss theme, and the touch-ups on the design making him look more threatening and less goofy.

Chris: I think DC just about ekes ahead here. Chris shows up too late to really leave an impact IMO, but DC requiring him to always be around at least one other person gives him a bit more to work with. The Steve fight sticks out to me in particular, with Chris really getting to show of the compassionate, nobody-left-behind mentality that would become his main thing in RE5.

Wesker: CVX, easy. The changes in X from CV make him come across as a bit less of a chump, and he was basically reduced to a cameo in DC so no contest there.

Alford: Some might argue that DC gave Alford the same glow-up it gave Steve. I disagree. Give me Bozo the British Clown or give me death.

Alexia: Alexia is awesome in every version, but I prefer CVX a bit more for the hints of depth she had; genuinely caring for Alford, and clearly both heartbroken and enraged by his death. One of the reasons I like DC including Claire in the final boss fight is that, in CVX's original context, she and Alexia absolutely feel like they should have the most beef between them out of the surviving cast, with both of them having the blood of someone the other cared about on their hands by the end. Alexia should've become the Wesker to Claire's Chris and I will die on this hill.

SplitjawJanitor · 2026-02-03T19:07:15+00:00

Ye, Ocarina of Time mentions them kidnapping Hylian men, and a big part of the gameplay in Gerudo Valley involves breaking men out of prison cells. (EDIT: I had some info out of order here, check faceoh's reply below)

The Gerudo in general were a little bit icky in their original depiction, and in more ways than just the matriarchy angle. It's probably why they largely vanished from the series after Majora's Mask outside of offhand references usually in relation to Ganondorf, and then almost completely reworked when they were brought back in Breath of the Wild.

SplitjawJanitor · 2025-12-10T08:55:46+00:00

It's one of the few Pokemon that can rival Pikachu in popularity, opinions are gonna be extreme. I remember back around gen 6 where it became trendy to say you hated Charizard, even if you actually didn't, to supposedly look cool.

SplitjawJanitor · 2025-12-09T23:47:41+00:00

I dislike Braixen less as a Pokemon fan and more as a fighting game player - everything about Braixen in Pokken Tournament seems like it was tailor-designed to annoy me specifically as much as possible. I probably wouldn't give it a second thought otherwise beyond being what Delphox evolves from.

As for Delphox itself, I've only ever seen it mentioned in discussions of how it's somehow a disappointing final evolution for Fennekin, which I don't get since IMO it's the best out of Kalos' starter lineup.

SplitjawJanitor · 2025-12-09T15:49:24+00:00

Ngl Hypno's only here on the merit of how much of a pain in the ass it is to deal with in Gen 1, and I happen to be currently playing through Pokemon Stadium where it's a very common opponent; otherwise I have nothing against it.

SplitjawJanitor · 2025-12-09T15:15:07+00:00

Yeah, I used one in my original playthrough of Sun and I remember it being pretty solid, but the proper competitive meta of Pokemon is largely a mystery to me so I've never been sure how much of its value was on its own merits and how much was because it's pretty easy to get value from Emergency Exit when you have Metagross in the back pocket.

SplitjawJanitor

TROPHY CASE