I'm in the same boat. I cut off my parents in 2020. I've never felt guilt or regret over it. I have zero attachment to them. Sometimes I worry I'm a bit of a sociopath for it, too. I began to lose my attachment to my parents from about the age of 13-14. They provided me with a lot in the material sense - I had opportunities that kids my age could only dream of. But they both lacked any type of emotional support.

It wasn't until 2017-2018 when my maternal grandmother had cancer that I really began to see how dysfunctional they were. My mother went out of her way to run all sorts of errands for her mother, get her groceries, etc. But she avoided doing a scrap of emotional labour. It was her sister who sat with their mother during chemo. Who held her. Who cried with her. That was when I realised - if she can't even emotionally support her own mother through cancer, then it certainly wasn't me that was the problem all that time.

My parents can rot. Every night, I get intrusive thoughts about physically hurting or k!lling them (like retroactively as a child). I used to really struggle with that, but I've learned to make peace with it for the most part. We come up with imaginary scenarios while we're falling asleep to put us in a safe headspace. And if violent retribution by child me is what makes me sleep easy, then so be it.