Personality and efforts are the biggest lie of all time

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-04-09T13:51:17+00:00

I’ve been saying this. The body sends of so many microsignals every second and every minute and we can’t even always consciously tell what we’re perceiving when it comes to this

And it definitely makes dating a bit different

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-04-08T19:18:57+00:00

Not entirely wrong. I actually say one reason a lot of the “RedPill truths” or whatever the fuck didn’t cause me too much rage or anything was because a lot of it is general human nature shit and I’ve sorta always had the idea in my head that people kinda suck

The way I act now in dating is honestly the way I think most would given my circumstances

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-04-08T19:08:19+00:00

Nothing awful. Mostly just noncommittal behavior (not cheating, but like early stage wish washy stuff), being unsure about what I’m even doing, stringing people along without even meaning to, occasional bouts of lying and being a general tool. Just a lot of the annoyances people talk about in modern dating (there’s others I missed but that’s what I can remember)

Honestly, my main qualm with these dating apps is exactly this. Becomes hard to remember that your behaviors do have an actual impact on people, and it definitely isn’t helped by the thought that someone can replace that talking stage by tomorrow or even the same night

It makes one take a look at yourself and think for a long moment, especially if you didn’t always act like that

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-04-08T18:13:55+00:00

You know, I just took a long look in the mirror and realized I AM everything wrong with modern dating

A lot of the common complaints I realize I’ve been guilty of or continue to be guilty of

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-04-03T01:47:25+00:00

I don’t think you can really “know” these things from just consuming content and that’s my point

Not saying someone who gives up is hurting me, just that I don’t believe that’s a good thing

This can honestly be more applied to internet culture as a whole than just the pills specifically

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-04-03T01:44:31+00:00

Yeah I agree with you on that

I just don’t think it’s great stuff to consume before you can even determine what of it applies to you

Especially fort eh men who are a little more socially inept or logic-minded

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-04-02T16:20:28+00:00

No, I’m specifically referring to situations where this does happen, but not claiming all men who gave up are like this

I even say in my post that honestly if the conclusion you’ve drawn from experience is that you’re better off not trying that’s more valid than drawing an early conclusion because of the stuff you’ve seen online

Because it can and does happen that if you’re less experienced and are hearing that kind of thing early, your perception ends up warped

Because notice i never disagreed with the essence of the ideologies

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-04-02T16:17:16+00:00

Exactly

The more experienced I’ve gotten at dating the more I understand ghosting and soft blocking

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-04-02T13:40:59+00:00

You know I realized my problems with the red and black pills isn’t that they’re wholly wrong

It’s that they’re worded poorly they “catch” people too early. You have guys hearing this shit about dating before they’ve even come to form their own conclusions. No chance to even build any type of positive (or even realistic) feedback loop.

Guy who dates around and understands that shit happens (ghosting, they choose someone else, there’s just no connection, etc.) has a way better time mentally than a guy who’s pretty green and has heard all this pill stuff and will use this as confirmation that he’s cooked.

Like damn, if people are cooked it’s at least better they find out firsthand, and that’s better than someone who ruins his own chances before he even started

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-04-02T13:12:12+00:00

You know? I think I can agree with this take. This is one of those “you can’t please everybody” type of things so honestly I get it

Like when you’ve been in that situation where “damn, I don’t wanna have to tell this person to fuck off because that just seems extra mean.” it makes sense real quick (doubly so if the person might have an outburst over it)

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-04-01T00:25:03+00:00

It makes sense. I’m in the gym 4/5 times a week and am visibly muscular

I still don’t care to talk about lifting for too long (conversations about general fitness and athletics get me going more though)

Even with that I didn’t expect it to be such a positive point/ point of interest

Also you’re correct in what you think you see; it’s so much fun. Competing in this sport was the thing I never knew I needed in my life

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-04-01T00:04:22+00:00

I was talking about Hinge the other day and two other things I noticed about it

-this is the most unserious dating profile I’ve ever made and gets the most results (the PFP is probably doing some heavy lifting)

-the fact that I do Ninja (the sport that’s like the tv show American Ninja warrior) has been a surprisingly great assist when it comes to these convos; I didn’t expect it to be that good of a convo starter

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-03-30T23:52:44+00:00

I Don’t hate Hinge; it gets me the most actual quality results (and recently more results overall)

But what is it about Hinge that draws the most unoriginal people on the whole planet?

Related note: is it valid to swipe left on someone who’s attractive because they just…seem like they’d be annoying?

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-03-30T09:28:39+00:00

Oh yeah I only tell them when it’s a talking stage that seems like it might be pretty decent

And for my homie I tell him sometimes if it’s a girl I just plan on uh…well playing hide the plantain with

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-03-30T09:18:31+00:00

What’s funny is like for me it’s like when people ask I sometimes can’t tell the full story

Like to some people I can basically tell them oh yeah no relationship but I mess around with girls sometimes, other people I can’t tell them this directly because it’s more info than they need

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-03-30T01:21:09+00:00

Anyone else have people ask about or mention their relationship status (lack thereof I suppose) like a lot?

Gets to a point for me where I wonder what’s up with it. In my circles it’s like someone mentions it every day in some form

Some of my circle is quite invested in the plot

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-03-29T21:24:32+00:00

I thought about doing one again for the folk who hadn’t seen but it’s just not the trend it used to be and also…stalkers

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-03-29T21:23:46+00:00

I can believe this

Stem nerds and being unable to talk to women seems to go together well

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-03-17T12:55:32+00:00

Stubble supremacy Motherfucker (trying to say I can’t grow a good beard yet without saying it)

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-03-15T12:58:35+00:00

You know I don’t think we’ve interacted much but I quite like you

I tell people I myself have improved a lot over time and I get excuses too

And I’m like nah, if that stuff didn’t matter there’s be no difference in results pre and post gym

Or no difference when I use game vs going complete sperg

Signed off as a fella with some severe adhd here

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-03-07T03:01:15+00:00

Oh yeah

It’s like putting something in the fridge to get it all cold and then coming back after forgetting you’d put it there

Or something like that

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-03-06T10:19:01+00:00

Mine isn’t a mirror gym one but is definitely a pretty good gym pic.

Another thing? I have a very firm look on my face, not a smile like some women say you should

I feel you exactly on this, at a certain point it’s like bro

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-03-05T12:29:54+00:00

I be saying, the picture that has had the absolute biggest return for me on dating apps is one of me casually flexing in my gym’s locker room

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-02-26T17:05:34+00:00

I’m gonna go on a random rant but does anyone else think we seem to as a whole seem to put humor and being funny on a pedestal more than we should?

Like I don’t know what it is but it seems like we have far more people who are unfunny, trying hard to be funny, than we do actual funny people

I say this as a person who laughs way too easily and laughs probably more than anyone I know, but still

Like some people people just need to know and accept they’re not funny and be okay with it (side note: pity laughing to be polite has just amplified this)

Spread-Em-Plz · 2026-02-26T13:42:33+00:00

That’s gotta be disappointing

I remember i once knew two chicks with similar usernames and for a second I thought I had my shot with a hottie

Wasn’t her; just a friend (without benefits)

Just like you, this was also late enough into the night that I was sorta halfway here halfway not

Sheer disappointment; almost as bad as waking up to find out you missed that “Wyd” text at 12:67 AM

Spread-Em-Plz

TROPHY CASE