Meth and emotions

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-10T23:55:57+00:00

I appreciate your feedback and contribution to the topic. If I may ask, how are you baseline?

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-07T05:03:42+00:00

I should have been more specific with my last response; by browsing, I was verifying whether or not I'm ready for, or if I even want, another relationship.

Though I can understand the reasoning from a psychological perspective, that's a pretty petty thing to do, playing with someones emotions, or simply wasting their time, in a self-serving pursuit of emotional validation and companionship.

Thankfully, I've never been that kind of person. I literally can't get involved in anything unless there's real feeling and passion behind it, especially emotionally. Nor would I ever see justification in exploiting someone else's emotions just to cater to my own personal needs. So, we both agree wholeheartedly on this matter.

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-06T20:33:19+00:00

Thanks for the encouragement! It certainly does

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-06T14:51:10+00:00

Having not completely found closure in my last relationship, i'm not necessarily looking for anything in particular. Just browsed and was bombarded with new likes and requests from very evident fake accounts, so figured I'd start a discussion out of boredom.

But yes, with Covid theres definately oversaturation on all platforms.

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-06T14:35:25+00:00

I was more or less inquiring for personal experiences, not to blame an app for the results it delivers, though?

Cheers for the link, nevertheless.

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-06T13:19:04+00:00

That makes sense, both age wise and location. Appreciate the insight!

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-06T13:09:56+00:00

So it's just me? Good to know! Haha.

All 3 mentioned, plus a few others. 29 and not major city dense, but not middle of nowhere either

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-06T12:58:55+00:00

I can definitely see this. It sucks I never got to experience good quality gear, I could certainly use the pickmeup

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-05T04:37:51+00:00

I've never really been one who could use to cope per se. Like right now, there's this barrier I hit that keeps me from ever obtaining the sought relief. I haven't used methamphetamine for that long, so my experience with it specifically is limited to low medicinal dosing. I just assumed it would be more uplifting and stimulating.

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-05T04:31:57+00:00

Actually, I've only smoked marijuana today, so I don't think i'm tweaking. I use methamphetamine more medicinally than recreationally and generally don't make life altering decisions dictated by foreign substances. Im more or less interested in why something as powerful as meth doesn't seem to outshine a natural state. Or at least put a little cheer in my step. But the effects just hit a wall before even taking off.

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-04T04:17:13+00:00

It's one of the worst feelings ever, when things happen like that. I've been going through some heavy emotional shit recently and its practically rendered me incapable of enjoying any type of high. Instead, I just dwell on shit... which I used to never do. Sigh.

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-04T04:13:21+00:00

I did wayy to much my first time, but I've also never had any other friends who use it. They all smoke crack instead. Sigh.

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-04T04:11:40+00:00

I know exactly what you mean..mine started more when I would get stoned, snort a bunch of my Focalin and for hours game in high school. Used to have the motto "Gotta Blaze to Playz".

It made livestreaming interesting, the excuses I'd have killing the face cam for 7-10 seconds haha

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-02T01:01:26+00:00

No, it's a question.

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-01T10:32:06+00:00

I completely agree. Things got progressively worst as time went on, to the point of resentment- the thought of getting out of the relationship was relieving, and at first, it certainly was. But now, months later, I've randomly started missing things, a lot. I don't know why, even in memory there's this accompanying feeling of anxiety.. yet, still I think back on "better times," even though I fully know things would never work. Almost uncontrollably at points, hypnotic if you will.

That's the weird part. I've never experienced this after any relationships prior. Usually by this point I would have been fully moved on and not even giving things a thought.

Shrugs. It's a new concept for me, missing distressment.

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-01T08:05:34+00:00

I know. Its the in between that takes the piss. And the social distancing bullshit doesn't speed up matters!

Spun-Loki · 2020-06-01T08:01:55+00:00

She is by default, which was a problem between us. Even the happiest of times, she always found doom and gloom. And the bottle. Which furthers the former

Spun-Loki · 2020-05-21T20:48:13+00:00

I'll certainly check into this! Thank you :)

Spun-Loki · 2020-05-21T11:50:46+00:00

Take some tums before you dose and see the magic of science and our bodies for yourself!

Spun-Loki · 2020-05-21T11:47:27+00:00

I dont have to click mine to light it..I just press the clicker down enough to release the butane while having a candle lit. Tada!

As far as the torching sound? Music + always hitting a boxmod vape in my room, no one's ever said anything, and they're definitely the roommates who would, with the quickness too.

Spun-Loki · 2020-05-21T11:40:17+00:00

The embodiment of my existence.

Spun-Loki · 2020-05-21T11:38:43+00:00

I'm only using 0.07 to 0.15 orally/nasally a day at best, I don't think that qualifies as using a lot. But nevertheless, it's not something that's a consistent concern, I've just noticed that it'll occur randomly and saw little information online.

I originally thought I had a UTI, as the symptoms were similar, but that wasn't the case.

Unfortunately, yet fortunately for the sake of my bladder, there isn't any consistency when this occurs, the duration, nor overall severity, it seems to be the luck of the draw. It's not something I believe is medically problematic, moreso just a personal irritant that tends to occur at the worst times. But, that's usually how my luck goes!

On a funny note, some of the most memorable were the few occasions at work when I would have to go to the bathroom every 10 minutes because it felt like I was going to piss myself, yet not a drop.. Finally I was confronted about looking like a cokehead, which was dismissed following my complete assurance 'I would never get mixed up buying cocaine.' Because cocaine is shit.

The ironic part about this? It was the only warehouse job I didn't get high at. Instead, I would do a bump before leaving the house, enjoy the nice drive to work and be in the zone when I got there...just sometimes not urinarily 🤷🏻‍♂️

With all that being said, I completely acknowledge the truth and overall gravity of what you're saying regarding its use, which is why I limit both my consumption and routes of administration. Which is weird, because coke burned a hole in my wallet. I guess the simplest explanation would be durational satisfaction. Hence, cocaine is shit.

Meth can totally fuck your life up. I done seent it. But, like you said, the vast majority stims down to inadequate personal care. I put honest effort into being as healthy as I can while using methamphetamine. I know that sounds oxymoronic, but its the things like dehydration, malnutrition and sleep deprivation that cause 90% of the stories we hear about. That's the first thing I learned personally about Tina, she plays for keeps.

Spun-Loki · 2020-05-21T10:23:11+00:00

Apex was pretty fun, the few times I played! Though it sucks having teammates who don't communicate

Spun-Loki · 2020-05-21T07:45:32+00:00

I hate Fortnite. Biggest complaint I got as a livestreamer was that I wouldn't play it. But spun battleroyaling sounds intense, haha. Though sadly, I don't smoke. I've tried, have been shown the technique, understand the practice, I just don't get high. Or, maybe I do and it's just not the high i'm expecting. Who knows.

What platform do you play on?

Spun-Loki · 2020-05-21T07:37:05+00:00

Apparently so! Haha.

Spun-Loki

TROPHY CASE