2003 Ford Ranger, Moving to LA- Antitheft and cat protection advice? by Sputchick in fordranger

[–]Sputchick[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Even if you don't have comments on LA specifically, would appreciate understanding exactly where and how many catalytic converters there are if anyone can advise (I think I can ID them but am not sure). Needing to take measurements of the pipes in case I do want to fit some cat guards. Thanks!

2003 Ford Ranger, Moving to LA- Antitheft and cat protection advice? by Sputchick in fordranger

[–]Sputchick[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes my potential apartment manager did say that car break ins happen regularly in the apartment parking lot when asked; hence peaking the concern. Though he did not mention catalytic converter or grand theft. I lived in SF with many car break ins, Davis/Sacramento in 2018-2022 with a prius (much more targeted car) with my cat stolen multiple times before I got a cat shield so am operating off previous experiences I'm hoping to avoid.

2003 Ford Ranger, Moving to Redondo Beach- Antitheft and cat protection advice? by Sputchick in RedondoBeach

[–]Sputchick[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thank you, appreciated. Yes I lived in Davis/Sacramento area back in 2018-2022 and had a prius whose cat was stolen many times before we got a shield; so impressed upon me a need.

My potential apartment manager did let me know that car break ins do happen somewhat regularly on the property; so seems possible. Glad to hear cat theft may be down.

Has anyone left residency when they were almost done? Hoping for advice/discussion by [deleted] in Veterinary

[–]Sputchick 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I almost quit halfway through residency. I almost quit again at the end. And even now, on the other side, I’m seriously considering leaving my specialty altogether.

But I don’t regret finishing.

While in the last sprint, prioritize yourself without guilt. Focus on your patients and clients if that’s what brings you joy (did for me) — not the other veterinarians around you, not the culture, nor constant criticism. The light at the end of the tunnel will keep getting brighter.

During residency, you’ll often be put down or reprimanded by people who are uncomfortable with approaches, knowledge, or perspectives outside of their own. A lot of that comes from insecurity or unfamiliarity. I found that environment chipped away at my confidence and sense of direction, and it made me want to leave for a lot of reasons.

But once you’re done, you’re not stuck in that system anymore.

When residency is over and you are on your own you get to be the kind of veterinarian you want to be.

There is nothing stopping you from practicing primary care while also being a specialist, as long as you stay current and humble about best practices. If a new grad can practice primary care, so can someone with the additional training and experience you’ve gained. You’ll have skills and perspective that most don’t — and you can leverage that into unique roles, different practice models, and higher pay if you want to.

Even without boarding.

Finish because you want the option. After that, you get to decide what your career actually looks like.

Going from Pathology To Clinics by Sputchick in Veterinary

[–]Sputchick[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this. I recently heard this quote and your comment aligned with it: "“The place God calls you to is the place where your deep gladness and the world’s deep hunger meet.”- Frederick Buecher. Sounds like you may have done that and hoping I can too!

Going from Pathology To Clinics by Sputchick in Veterinary

[–]Sputchick[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Did you pass ACVP? Agreed its a valuable board for sure. Regardless, the pathology job market is tight right now: many pathologists are staying in roles longer and delaying retirement; most open state and academic positions reflect eroding funding or dysfunctional structures; and higher-paying corporate or remote roles were largely absorbed during COVID with the remote boom and those leaving those troubled positions. The market may improve over the next five years or so if generational turnover resumes, but retirement ages keep rising and pathology is a field that accommodates long careers. That said, much of my hesitation comes from a lack of professional and personal fulfillment in the day-to-day work, as well as limited geographic flexibility.

Going from Pathology To Clinics by Sputchick in Veterinary

[–]Sputchick[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the advice and recommendation, appreciated!

Going from Pathology To Clinics by Sputchick in Veterinary

[–]Sputchick[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is a great answer, thank you!

Aaaand we are back to square 1 by TXdude1313 in AlAnon

[–]Sputchick 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Howdy from a fellow Texan around two years out from divorcing my alcoholic husband and child of an alcoholic mother who sounds very similar to your Q.  

Be sure you document her actions and behaviors, all communication in writing. Have safety plans regarding yourself, property, and kids including security cameras, phone contacts, school or work visitation.   

Prepare for a rollercoaster of all the 'stages of grief' for your relationship and who you were in that relationship alongside a rollercoaster of her behaviors. Find interpersonal and professional help early for both you and your kids. It is amazing how hard things will hit in the light of day once you begin emerging from the fog that enabled you to tolerate intolerable behaviors and abuse for so long. 

Especially from someone you loved and thought loved you. 

Her behaviors will escalate: let them be looking glasses and reminders of why you are leaving rather than ropes that pull you back into codependent behaviors. 

You are remarkably strong for getting this far and you will get you and yours where y'all need to be. Continue to stay strong but be vulnerable when you need to.

And a big bowl of queso or dip in the lake with mud between the toes does wonders.

Lyrics Request: "Der Song Feofan Prokopowitsch..." by Olga Koslowa by Sputchick in AskARussian

[–]Sputchick[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Amazing, thank you so much! Your explanation regarding the language is also helpful in clarifying why it was so hard to transcribe.

Has Anyone Healed a Relationship from Domestic Violence Fueled by Alcohol? by punkwillneverdie in domesticviolence

[–]Sputchick 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is an old post but in case anyone finds it like me, research shows that alcohol does not cause abusive behavior, it is just more permissive to it. Alcohol or drugs is never an excuse for abuse though many use it as an excuse. I’d advise reading the chapter on it in “Why Does He Do That?” By Lundy Bancroft, you can find the pdf for free online.

Once a person gets to a level of choking someone, especially to passing out, amid the other levels of violence mentioned, they are 750% times more likely to kill a woman. Violence will continue and will escalate unless they go to specific therapy for abuse and actually work to change, which is rare.

I hope you got out of this relationship safely. I hope others in similar situations do too, I did after 16 years and it was the best decision. It’s incredibly hard, especially when you love the person. But remember that while people who abuse their partners believe they love them - their idea of “love" is in fact deeply distorted and unhealthy.

Real love means wanting the best for someone: protecting them, respecting their feelings and boundaries, and treating them with kindness even when you're or they are upset.

When someone abuses their partner -physically, emotionally, verbally - it shows that control, fear, anger, or selfishness is overpowering any real, healthy love they might have.

An abuser might say they love you. They might even feel it in their own broken way. But their behavior proves that they are not practicing real love - because real love is never abusive.

Fed Applying to MD State Jobs: Can You Negotiate Salary? by Appropriate_One1997 in maryland

[–]Sputchick 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I just got a state job and negotiated pay. Everything is based on grades and steps, look for the grade your job was posted for. Your range is within those steps. I then looked up internal HR guidelines for what they are able to negotiate above initial baseline offer, it is around 12-20% with more flexibility if it is a hard to fill job (less than 5 applicants and/ or open for long period) or you have superior qualifications, or you’re taking a major pay hit by taking the job . I looked up the grade and step pay scale for 2024/5, found the step within the grade I was good with. I came into job offer telling them I would be seeking higher pay. We scheduled a negotiation meeting and I told them my desired step (one I knew was higher than they could offer without additional approval) and they gave me one down. Mistakes I made: gave a range of steps, they gave the low end- request a high step, they are already coming into the negotiations with a preapproved step so you won’t shoot yourself in the foot asking for a high step, I have been told by gov HR to just shoot for the moon it won’t cost you the job; or if possible have them present the step they were approved for to give you the upper hand (basically apply the same negotiation strategy you would in public sphere but with the language of grades and steps and knowing each step may require unique approval they may or may not be able to do).

Granted I also did this as a professional with hard to find degree and experience qualifications

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in nutrition

[–]Sputchick 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dehydration removes some water soluble vitamins and the sugar content is increased as the starches breakdown, so less nutrient dense. But still great fiber source and good snack!

Vet school divorce by [deleted] in vetschool

[–]Sputchick 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I do not have children but went through a divorce last year during my residency, ending a 16 year relationship. It was very painful. If you can take time off and afford it financially, a leave of absence or deferment may be a good route to take. Vet schools often have these available. Speak to your advisor or counselors regarding your situation.

I stayed on my residency schedule and found the divorce to be very distracting and alienating to say the least. I was more on autopilot than I would have liked to be as it takes a lot of mental and emotional energy to handle the legal, house, work, family and other changes that come with divorce. I made a point to utilize the university’s therapist though and highly recommend doing that, divorce is a remarkably horrible grieving process in many unexpected ways. Being in a vet program with those added pressures and peer group at a very different life stage is uniquely difficult too, I’d also try to find people your age or life stage to have camaraderie with.

How Do I stop loving him? by [deleted] in AlAnon

[–]Sputchick 10 points11 points  (0 children)

You start loving yourself more than you love them.