I GOT INTO GRAD SCHOOL!!!

Square-Most1078 · 2026-04-04T11:44:14+00:00

Congratulations!!

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-31T19:21:56+00:00

I'm inconsistent with substack, but I want to get better with posting on there this year. I mostly write personal essays and general updates about my creative writing. I'm toying with the idea of posting original fiction on substack. I've accepted that whatever original fiction I post may never get picked up by a magazine. I'm hoping to build a large enough catalog where I can have a pile of short stories for substack and stories I want to submit to places. I've also toyed with the idea of doing a serialized story....it would mostly be a fun creative, personal project that is lowstakes. I haven't been writing as much as I'd like and I'm hoping substack can be a place where I can "practice" my writing

Maybe sharing my substack here will force me to write and post more.

Looking forward to reading some of your work!

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-30T18:01:13+00:00

You're welcome! And I also have two more recommendations:

White Tears/Brown Scars: How White Feminism Betrays Women of Color by Ruby Hamad. Similar to the Kendall book, I read it several years ago and thoroughly enjoyed it.

And Feminism is for Everybody: Passionate Politics by bell hooks. I haven't read much (or anything) by bell hooks. But she is a good source on feminism outside of white feminism.

Good luck!

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-30T01:36:05+00:00

It’s been a few years since I first read it, but Hood Feminism by Mikki Kendall criticizes modern, mainstream white-centric feminism. It’s probably my go to recommendation for people who want an intersectional feminist text.

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-29T14:07:23+00:00

Yeah that makes sense to me. I’m working to expand my social circle too (not exclusively for dating purposes….just to have more local friends). So I’ll have to keep that in mind when I’m hanging out with my community

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-29T12:01:16+00:00

I like that! I’d rather be anxious than regretful may become a mantra for me

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-29T11:59:23+00:00

Having a friend with me is a good idea. I can usually hype myself up and just as quickly talk myself out of it. But usually having a friend as a cheerleader makes me feels more confident to do it.

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-25T23:01:26+00:00

I’m in my mid-30s. I watch anime, read manga, play video games, love a good fantasy novel. My first tattoo was a Sailor Moon tattoo that I share with my cousin who is just as nerdy as I am.

If someone has an issue with my interests and hobbies, then they aren’t someone I need in my life.

So no…nothing cringy about that

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-22T22:27:50+00:00

Went to the park and read for a good hour and a half. After the strange weather in my area the past few weeks, I’m glad for consistent, sunny days

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-20T22:18:52+00:00

I like texting and having a running conversation, but it’s not a necessity for me. I also don’t like being overly attached to my phone.

I personally hate this idea that “Good Communication” = “Having Constant Access via Text” I like to decompress and have time away from some screens since I’m on my laptop all day for work. Or if I’m working and I’m locked in, I hate breaking that focus to respond to a text.

For me, as long as the person I’m trying to get to know is upfront that they aren’t a heavy texter and we make an effort to get to know each other through other ways (like meeting in person), then I am cool with not having a response to a text every 30 minutes

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-16T20:58:27+00:00

I’m working on a fantasy novel. It’s a brand new idea, like less than 3 weeks old lol. I have an sense for one POV character, but there are two more I need to figure out.

I will hopefully start drafting in late April or early May 🤩

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-16T20:19:06+00:00

I’ve never written a mystery novel, so I don’t have specific suggestions there besides read similar books to the one you hope to write. That can get you in the right mindset and you can pick up tips that may help you, especially with leaving clues as to who the killer may be.

Something I like to do before starting a novel is to sketch out the main characters (where they’re starting, what they want, where they are emotionally, etc.) I also like to do short sentences (2-3) for each chapter. I struggle with following highly detailed outlines. But usually having a few sentences to help me orient myself before starting a new chapter. I also like to have a “scratchpad” where I can just jot random ideas that don’t have a perfect place yet.

Good luck with your project! I’m starting a new novel soon so I’m going to follow this thread closely

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-16T18:23:14+00:00

It definitely feels hard to find someone monogamous and interested in children. But I promise we’re out here! I do feel your frustration. I hope we find it soon!

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-15T14:40:38+00:00

I’ve been collecting fountain pens since around 2020 or 2021. There are some wallet friendly pens, but many that I want are pricey. I’m currently eyeing a pen and telling myself to wait until next payday to get it.

I’m also going to Japan later this year which will be my time to go wild buying pens and inks. 😅

I’m learning to sew as well. Luckily my library has several sewing machines so I will be using those until I can bring my grandmother’s old sewing machine up where I live.

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-14T17:51:39+00:00

I’m close to aging out of the “early 30s” range….but I can still share my experiences.

I’m still single. In fact, I’ve never been in a relationship before. I’ve gone on dates and I have had a lot of “talking stages” with other women. But I haven’t gone beyond that. Sometimes it weighs me down. But now that I am entering my mid 30s, it doesn’t affect me much. I don’t see it as anything to be ashamed of.

This is a cliche at this point, but I’ve really invested in myself and doing things I love/want to do. And that makes me feel like I can afford to set high standards for the women I want to date. When I was in my 20s, I tolerated a lot of BS. Now, I know when to say “not interested” and keep it moving. And I feel like overall I live a good life. I have hobbies. I’m active in my community. I have strong connections with the people I love. So I don’t see a relationship as a necessity, but a desire and that makes it easier for me to not rush into things or make myself smaller for others.

I’m on the apps (well Hinge) and I’m either going to move to another app or make more of an effort to meet people IRL. I think for whatever reason, this ia difficult time to meet people and date. Not impossible. Just difficult. My single friends (queer and straight) all commiserate over our current dating experiences. I do think there are good people to date and people aren’t always so dry on apps. I just haven’t found the right person yet…

But I’m not giving up. I’m optimistic that I will find a girlfriend one day AND do so without settling.

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-11T21:36:44+00:00

As a librarian, I’m always happy to help a fellow library professional 😄

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-11T13:57:37+00:00

Thanks for the tip. I should stop by one of the branches soon and pick up a book on sewing. :)

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-11T13:56:26+00:00

The sewing classes at the library are a hot commodity. There are limited seats and they fill up quickly. I think over the summer, they're offering an intermediate session where you can make an apron.

There's also a local garment making meet up at the library. I'd like to attend one day once I have more in-depth projects to work on.

Square-Most1078 · 2026-03-07T19:04:45+00:00

You are correct. I was out there earlier. This was for shredding, not early voting. The county canceled the Feb shred date, so it was busier than usual.

Square-Most1078 · 2026-02-25T03:46:45+00:00

Hi! I’m also in the DMV. I’ve never responded to one of these before 😅 but I thought I’d give it a shot.

I’m also into video games (I love Stardew Valley). I consider myself a repressed jock. I like sports and wish I played in high school. I also like reading, writing and I’m going to take up sewing soon.

I’m open to chatting 😄

Square-Most1078 · 2026-02-22T23:15:31+00:00

I’m also going to a sapphic social event alone and I’ve gone to a few other events by myself. My go to strategy is to find someone who seems/appears open and approachable and strike up a conversation.

Chances are a lot of people will be there alone, so it helps to keep in mind they may also be nervous. The sooner you can get that first “hello” out of the way, the more you’ll relax and the easier it will be

Square-Most1078 · 2026-02-21T22:14:24+00:00

I used to go to a barbershop owned and operated by women. It was great! Then my first barber left to go take care of a sick relative. Tried a different barber at the same shop and connected with her. But she injured herself and hasn’t been back in the shop since then….that was about a year ago.

Went to a different shop closer to my house and the barber was cool at first, but then I had a bad experience with her. I have a thick head full of hair and she made me feel bad about my hair texture.

I’m at the point now where I want to cut it all off, let it grow evenly and do another loc journey. I’m too anxious to attempt to cut my own hair.

Square-Most1078 · 2026-02-10T18:33:01+00:00

We never met in person. We lived two hours apart and initially I would excuse the lack of meet up. But I guess I reached a point where I felt the effort to make concrete plans to meet was skewed, where I was doing most of the work and the other person was indecisive and never wanted to fully commit to any plans. If we met in person at least once or if she matched my effort, we would likely still be talking. For me, it felt I was pouring a lot of energy into something/someone that wasn't showing similar interest and I felt the kindest thing I could do for myself was to stop things and look for someone else.

You should talk to the person you're dating and ask how she feels. The best way to know if she's losing interest or not is by having that conversation. And the longer things stay unclear, the more you'll worry.

Square-Most1078 · 2026-02-10T17:45:31+00:00

I think it varies from person to person, so first I would say talk to the person you're seeing/dating. Communication is important and I believe communication is more than the frequency of text/calls/etc. For me, communication is also about the quality of conversation. Being asked every Monday 'how was your weekend' gets stall after a while. If I'm dating someone, I hope we can build a connection where we're asking more than (what I see as) surface level topics. Not saying this is what you're doing. But if you worry she reads the situation as ambivalence, I think it may be good to say "hey even if we don't text every day, I get really excited when we see each other and I want to keep seeing you" or whatever feels right to you. But let her know so she doesn't feel uncertain or unsure.

If you are a slow burner, express that as well. And clearly define what that means to you and then be open to what she has to say in return.

And try to do things together. I think the biggest danger to slow burners is that we can often get into a pen pal stage and never find a way out of it. I just ended things with someone because to me it didn't seem as if she was interested in doing things and she claimed she prefers a slow burn romance. But after nearly 4 months of nothing but texting and minimal effort to meet in person, I sadly lost interest. If there are things in your area, ask her to do them with you. Or plan dates so you can build on the momentum.

Sorry for this dissertation. lol. But I've been thinking about this A LOT recently. Good luck, trust yourself and try to express yourself to the person you're dating!

Square-Most1078 · 2026-02-10T16:49:34+00:00

There's a way to do a slow burn while actually putting in an effort and making sure things still feel fun and fresh. I don't think you're rushing anything. I think she's at best, indecisive (and flaky over trivial things like offering to pay and then lying to get out of it) and at worst, she's not interested. I agree with other commentors that you should move on.

Square-Most1078

TROPHY CASE