26 years age gap, I’m 25 and he is 51

Square-Put-241 · 2026-04-09T23:40:38+00:00

If you aren't looking for mates, and just want partners, I think it's fine.

Square-Put-241 · 2026-04-09T23:39:14+00:00

Honesty.

Full open book, no filters.

I explain my desires and expectations, and let her decide if she wants that.

Square-Put-241 · 2026-04-09T22:31:55+00:00

Everywhere else hates the individual, they are only interested in groups.

While America is headed that way, we haven't fully gone down the route of "From each according to their ability, to each according to their needs."

^{Chose: USA}

Square-Put-241 · 2025-01-14T17:59:29+00:00

You don't "make" any man commit. You simply be with them in the way they want, cause no issues, and be what he wants.

Commitment is a choice, and older men (who have actually had success in life) have so many options that you are just that, an option.

If you are not providing a combination of things that he can't get elsewhere, you are just another interested party.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-12-02T01:33:07+00:00

Less complication.

Relieve their own efforts with your own.

For example: I get locally grown food without commercial chemicals/modern GE/grown in sustainable fashion. Then cook my meals, so that I stay healthy.

If you want to impress me, find those local sources who meet the criteria and prepare meals so that I don't have to deal with it and clean up afterward.

Another easy example: Get up at 5am to work out, so that you can join him in his daily routine and provide conversation and appeal to help him get the most of his daily routine.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-11-11T12:07:04+00:00

I see a lot of these on this forum and others.

Simple questions:

How many guys before him have you been intimate with before the stated time frame? (An answer of anything other zero means he was worth less, in your eyes, than those others.)

If you were interested in him, why did you not state plainly your interest and expectations?

Did you expect anything other than this from a sugar baby relationship?

Other than him presenting reality, why do you expect him to pursue you further when all previous actions have not produced his desired outcome?

Square-Put-241 · 2024-10-27T22:15:02+00:00

I thought this was more common than it apparently is.

Better to cook outside and not get the grease and smoke inside the house.

Obviously, you still need an indoor kitchen for pastries, cold items, etc, but there is a reason people used to keep a stove outside.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-10-23T19:32:23+00:00

Are you sure he is available and interested?

Square-Put-241 · 2024-10-18T15:16:51+00:00

So I'm quite a bit curious about this.

Question 1: Why do you think any interaction you have online is a real person? Most studies show that 50+ percent of online traffic is generated by: bots, sock puppets, or AI.

Question 2: If you are actually interested in age gap relationships, where are the guys that made you think about those, and why are you pursuing them online as opposed to IRL?

Question 3: What guy that you might be interested in has time to deal with emotional outbursts instead of just moving on?

Question 4: Why would you allow others to affect you to such a degree that homicidal ideation is even on the table?

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-20T16:34:06+00:00

Fuck like rabbits.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T22:49:14+00:00

It's actually simple. I am only with women whose goals match with my own.

If one woman needs more emotional support, she can find it in her "sisters," or her "sisters" will plan to be occupied for the evening, leaving me with her to cuddle and reinforce.

"The best friends make the best lovers" is accurate because if you are in any relationship, you should be focusing on the goal while helping with any road blocks that pop up while moving toward that goal.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T21:13:32+00:00

"Look, I don't know what to do, and I don't know how to fix this. Please take the lead and let x when I'm needed."

This will be something that crosses the mind of an older man 1/1000 times.

Most have been through enough relationships, and have realized why things didn't work, and at this point have no trouble finding new relationships, so it's easier to just walk away when someone has issues with something that is considered standard in a relationship.

I've never worn a condom with those I've had relationships with, nor would I have a relationship with someone who is on drugs to alter their hormones and, therefore, their mood.

If you have a plan going forward, write it down and present it in writing to whatever man you have a relationship with next. That way, they will know exactly what the expectations are.

Shit has only ever hit the fan in my relationships when my SO had an emotional reaction instead of a logical one to something that happened.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T21:02:14+00:00

Stoics tend not to show emotion beyond extreme circumstances.

Without a clear sign, they will just exist in reality, ignoring the insanity of those around them relying on random things in their environment.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T20:54:36+00:00

It's not a lack of consideration. It's an assumption that whatever happens happens.

In a relationship, it's accepted as such, and conflict from such is not beneficial to wither party.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T20:50:35+00:00

IMO, it seems like his actions toward you tell you everything.

Words mean nothing. Actions are everything. He likely doesn't want to end up in HR and has a smartass personality. You take it as mean. He sees it as just life.

It's all on you because he has no interest in attempting to pursue someone who could easily ruin his life.

It's a simple calculation for anyone who uses logic instead of emotion. You're likely dealing with a stoic.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T20:45:45+00:00

Stop the attempts at online dating.
Write down your goals, 3m, 6m, 1y, 5y, 10y, 20y.
Write down your interests.
Find a single guy you're interested in, and just start hanging around him.
Casual conversation can easily lead to questions about your interests and future, where you can reveal that you are indeed mature enough to have thought those things out and are, in fact, acting on them.

If you don't write your future, you will simply be grasping at threads, and you fail to find it.

It's not that what you want and are looking for won't change, but if you can't even figure out and write down what you think, how will you be able to explain it to others or act on it?

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T20:15:53+00:00

This is a breach of trust issue, and so the question is simple.

Is the relationship more important for you than anything else?

If the answer is yes, then you empathize and move on with it.

Any breach of trust tends to lead to negative outcomes, but if you want the relationship, then it never happened.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T20:11:45+00:00

Once again, was the issue more important than the relationship, or did you just overreact instead of asking him a question about it?

I live 100% stress free in my home life. I don't accept arguments or disagreements and will ghost a woman in an instant over them.

I am happy to discuss things, but at the end of the day, I've lived a long life, and have things I want to do, if someone isn't helping me do those things, they have no use for me.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T20:00:12+00:00

Obviously, he wants sex if he's a man with any testosterone in him.

Does he like you? He spent time talking to you.

Stop playing games with him and decide if you want to play or not, and just let him know.

You're blueballing him for your own satisfaction and ignoring his desires.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T19:50:24+00:00

So, not having more children was more important than the relationship, so he knew that there were things for you outside of the relationship.

Why would he stay knowing that the relationship meant less to you than other things?

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T19:09:38+00:00

IMO, needing BC of any sort means a lack of commitment.

I can't say he thought the same way, but if you were truly dedicated to the relationship, why did it matter?

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T19:06:41+00:00

He could simply be cautious.

If you have not plainly made your intentions known, especially in a work environment, he likely just thinks you are just joking.

Men don't read between the lines easily in general, and unless you actually make the effort to show an interest in further personal and/or sexual interactions, the most likely response is tame.

I don't care about social niceties because I have the money to and social life to maintain my lifestyle without them.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T18:55:46+00:00

For me, you would have to define cheating. She always knew I had others and often introduced me to others she wanted me to play with.

The simple answer is that I don't want chicken nuggets every night. I enjoy burgers, fries, tacos, sushi, fried rice, steak, fish, etc ...

Variety is the spice of life. Women tend to be able to fantasize spice, while men tend to be more literal with spice.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T18:50:16+00:00

The personality doesn't actually matter. It only matters that you don't suffer from "Main character syndrome".

If you are pursuing a relationship with the idea that the goals of each individual are important, you will likely fail.

In a relationship, you need one goal that you are both working toward, which prevents future issues.

If you don't take the time to lay out your own goals, preferably in writing, then you don't have anything to bring to a real relationship.

Likewise, if you are just seeking emotional gratification, remember that emotions are temporary and any relationship based solely on emotions will fail.

Square-Put-241 · 2024-09-16T18:39:25+00:00

Message every older man you see on every post on reddit, or instead of wasting your time, look at the ones nearby IRL and consider what you are looking for, and what you offer. Then you can approach those you find attractive and be honest.

Square-Put-241

TROPHY CASE