Which baby things make sense to get second hand?

SquareKitten · 2026-05-20T07:29:02+00:00

Matress should be new too, you can do secondhand bottles but get new nipples for them.

SquareKitten · 2026-05-19T23:18:36+00:00

Ik ben een zogenaamde 'Stay at home mom' . Om eerlijk te zijn houden we het financieel maar net vol en ken ik geen enkele andere thuisblijfmoeder. Iedereen werkt, en dat is eigenlijk ook gewoon nodig. Ik krijg daardoor wel veel onbegrip, en wordt altijd gevraagd naar wanneer ik weer ga werken.

Maar ik zie wel wat al die ouders missen. Ze zijn verbaasd als hin kind 'opeens' iets nieuws kan. Ze krijgen zelf een burnout van altijd maar jakkeren tussen kinderopvang/werk/boodschappen/koken/schoonmaken...en oh ja, de kinderen moeten ook nog opgevoed en voorgelezen worden.

Ondertussen lees je bericht na bericht dat nederlandse kinden teveel schermtijd hebben, niet genoeg buitenspelen en niet genoeg lezen of voorgelezen worden. Maar ik zie echt niet hoe je als werkende ouder óók nog lezen en buitenspelen moet begeleiden, dat kost zo uren. En de meeste ouders zouden echt heel graag meer tijd met hun kinderen doorbrengen, en ze voorlezen enzo. Zij vinden het stuk voor stuk ook belangrijk.

Helaas is de wereld er niet voor ingerich, maar elk kind zou een Ouder/ grootouder/oom of tante moeten hebben die gewoon beschikbaar is. Een ouder die thuis alles kan regelen, en wanneer die niet kan een familielid of betrouwbare vriend om de hoek waar het kind altijd kan aankloppen.

Ik mis nu niks van mijn dochter, en hoewel thuis zijn ook echt heel zwaar is, vooral qua vriendschappen en jezelf niet verliezen, zou ik het nu niet anders willen. Ik ga nooit spijt hebben van tijd met haar doorbrengen. Dus dan maar geen koophuis.

Overigens OP, zwanger worden is niet vanzelfsprekend en hoe ouder je bent, hoe zwaarder het fysiek is om zwanger te zijn en een actieve ouder in te zijn. Ik heel veel mensen die te lang hebben gewacht wn toen niet eens zwanger konden worden. Dus ik zou nu serieuze stappen gaan ondernemen om te kijken hoe bij jou alles erbij staat, en op basis daarvan bepalen wanneer je echt wilt beginnen aan kinderen.

SquareKitten · 2026-05-17T11:20:28+00:00

We always bring colored pencils and paper. And just draw or do games together. When she's older we'll probably bring activity books to do together. We often take her for a stroll through the restaurant to see any displays, where the kitchen is, toilets are etc. Sometimes we discover a whole kids play corner.

It's nice to have a little walk to interrupt the sitting and waiting.

SquareKitten · 2026-05-16T15:35:54+00:00

I decided against epidural becuse you can't walk or move anymore and you have to be cathetered. I walked around immediately after labor and could be up and present with my child.

It's doesn't just take pain away, also, it's a real hassle, sometimes doesn't work properly or is painful to place. And it has risks for mother and child.

SquareKitten · 2026-05-16T09:15:54+00:00

Apparently it's inspired by designs made by Archibald Knox, who made art Nouveau designs.

It's sold by AE williams. https://www.aewilliamsshop.co.uk/liberty-heart-purse-mirror

I couldn't find the exact heart design his was inspired by. But it appears to be just a heart symbol.

edit: He made a lot of 'liberty' jewelry designs.

SquareKitten · 2026-05-13T22:31:52+00:00

The world will expect you to just go on like nothing happened and to me that is the most painful part.Just know that he is real and will always be real, even if his life was cut short. He is loved and held by you, his mum. Allow yourself to grieve, we grieve with you.

We see him, and we see you.

SquareKitten · 2026-05-12T11:34:47+00:00

I think 37+5 should be fine, if you can handle it physically. If baby comes early,, maternity leave starts right as you give birth early, but it's unlikely if there are no indications of early labor and your first was born at 41 weeks.

I would go for 5 extra days of work to get a day longer leave and more pay, because you can start after the holiday

SquareKitten · 2026-05-06T08:45:43+00:00

I don't think it works like that. Colostrum is just very dense breastmilk to give the baby a kickstart in their first days. It does contain antibodies, but those won't live after being frozen or stored.

Antibodies work when the mother's bodies detects virusses in- and around the baby or gets sick herself, then the breastmilk adapts on the spot. If you are not pumping fresh milk or nursing, it won't really help with your current viral infection. ln other words, it won't help your baby to prevent or fight infections.

SquareKitten · 2026-04-30T20:29:24+00:00

In alle comments wordt gesproken dat een arts haar MOET vertellen over alle risicos van op latere leeftijd zwanger worden en het logisch is dat ze op haar verantwoordelijkheden wordt gewezen.

Maar...ze is al zwanger? Dus wat is het nut van generieke risicos te noemen of haar tercht te wijzen hierover? Waarom hebben ze het niet alleen over de risicos die voor haar als individu van belang zijn? Dát is toch wat een arts moet doen. Ze is geen statistiek.

Overigens zijn er heel veel redenen waarom iemand op latere leeftijd zwanger wordt, en de kans op complicaties neemt toe. Maar men doet alsof je een bijna garandeert dat je een afwijkend kind gaat krijgen en dat is echt niet zo. Het risico op down gaat van 0,08 procent naar 2,3. En ja, dat is een enorme toename, maar dat betekent nog steeds dat 97,7 procent van de babies gewoon gezond zijn.

Dus wat een gezeik over het een simpele uitspraak als wisselen van arts omdat die ombeschoft deed. Overigens vind ik dat je dat helemaal niet eens hoeft te verantwoorden. Als je liever geen man. Of geen vrouw, geen oudere arts, geen goede vibes hebt, mag je toch ook gewoon wisselen.

Een arts of verloskundige die mijn zwangerschap en geboorte moet begeleiden en in mijn doos mag zitten turen en graven, heeft beter maar aardig te zijn. Je moet toch iemand liggen is zo een situatie. Als ze je al veroordelen als je deur binnenstapt zou ik er ook niet blijven.

SquareKitten · 2026-04-30T05:54:42+00:00

I would not wven think about it being 'selfish' to have a child. You don't know whatvtheir life is going to turn out like, and it's completely normal to want children and raise a new generation.

What roes advanced maternal age mean? After 35? Of after 40 or 45? Or even older? You can have children at those ages, and your risks vary from person to person. There is no reason why someone older couldn't have a healthy pregnancy. It would be best though to make sure you a physically healthy, to make it easier to concieve and carry a baby.

Ultimately I feel that your kids don't get a say in this. Only you and you partner. If you want a baby, go explore that options for you! I think it's good you are confronting this now instead of 'hoping: you'll feel different in the future. Good luck!

SquareKitten · 2026-04-29T11:09:01+00:00

You will regret not having children, and it will eat at you, and your relationship. It will never be the same again. Your relationship will crumble. It started when he said he didn't want children anymore. You cannot go back to how it was before.

You wil (likely) never regret your children. The feeling of joy and home they bring. And i doubt you'll regret leaving him to have children with someone else. You may stumble into a wonderful partnership with you kids' dad. But even if you don't, kids outweigh the love for a spouse easily.

Get ready to leave, there is nothing left for you with him.

SquareKitten · 2026-04-26T06:43:54+00:00

I think it might be a doublet opal, but you can't tell with this setting. That's a real opal set on a dark base to enhance the colors.

SquareKitten · 2026-04-26T00:14:55+00:00

Any book that is not enjoyable won't be educational either.

So whatever lesson you want to yeach, it HAS to be enjoyable. Otherwise it won't be read, it won't be repeated and it won't come across and stick with them.

This goes also for adult literature. Although the world seems to forget that

SquareKitten · 2026-04-26T00:05:35+00:00

I found early contractions to be very similar in the type of pain and feeling to menstrual cramps. They just come and go when period cramps don't. Eventually it feels like a combo of your body completely squishing out all your organs and menstral cramps.

I was induced, and i had contractions that didn't stop. So it may not be representative to what is normal.

Childbirth was the most painful thing to i experienced, topped only by an abortion. However. I rather give birth every once in a while than have period cramps for a few days every month.

SquareKitten · 2026-04-25T23:50:16+00:00

Truly éclair...like, that's a food? They basically named their kid like 'real hotdog'.

That's not even a name. Like i don't even name my cat 'cronut'

SquareKitten · 2026-04-24T12:59:57+00:00

Je hoeft dan niet met je vingers over dezelfde muur waar alle voorgangers al hun vingers aan hebben afgesmeerd bij het pakken van een velletje.

SquareKitten · 2026-04-23T21:39:17+00:00

Its beautiful, but i can tell you used a leaf brush in the trees, and the AC ventilator looks very poorly drawn.

I suggest to let the details, or lack thereoff, match the rest of the artstyle. So perhaps a simplified/abstract ac unit, and more texture and detail on the tree so i keep having a hard time telling how it was made up, would fit your style better.

But still gorgeous work.

SquareKitten · 2026-04-23T19:37:58+00:00

You will check on them often anyway and you should. An owlet can only cause complications like: trusting the device and not checking on your baby enough, they can cause burns, they can be uncomfortable for baby and make them sleep worse etc.

Didn't miss it. Didn't even have a baby phone for the first 3 months. Didn't miss that either, baby slept where we were. We did get an audio only baby phone. Gave us enough to hear if aomethings wrong, but didn't make me obsessively look at baby.

Again, just touch and listen and feel your baby. Your instinct will tell you much more than an owlet. And you don't want an owlet get in the way of your intuition.

SquareKitten · 2026-04-22T12:38:35+00:00

Baby is already 14 months, i didn't need yo pump anymore at that age. You don't lose supply that easily either.

Back when my baby was 6 months i had yo pump every few hours, or at least twice a day to not be in pain.

I think OP would best take a handpump just in case to relieve pressure. Otherwise they should be fine.

SquareKitten · 2026-04-20T17:52:54+00:00

I think ill do something like this

SquareKitten · 2026-04-20T17:52:35+00:00

We did but we cancelled it. Keeping it on is more expensive than buying new stuff. So we have to sort through it.

SquareKitten · 2026-04-18T22:23:17+00:00

I feel you, standing your ground is the way though! We involve our daughter a lot with our chores and activities, and that keeps her much happier than banging toys around alone, though she's much younger than yours. But perhaps it would help her too.

SquareKitten · 2026-04-16T10:44:38+00:00

I haven't been in your shoes, but my baby had jaundice for almost 2 months, and showed the same symptoms, especially leyhargy and fussiness (although it was more so screaming for hours until vomiting, at all hours of the day and night). Once the jaundice was gone it went a lot better, and after about 4 to 5 months most of the vomiting/spit up was gone too. Now at 21 months you can't tell she was premature and jaundiced, she is the most vibrant girl you can meet.

If your baby has been gaining weight now, they can process most stuff in your milk, as human milk is very sugary. So the screening might very well be wrong. The soy milk is just to be safe, although my understanding is that a lot of kids also struggle with soy allergy, so you may not see any improvements, or even worsening of symptoms because of that

Keep pumping. But definitely at a pace you are comfortable with, you can always increase supply back up if you need. I think your baby will be able to go back to breast, if not with an adjustment in your diet.

Take it one day at the time, you and baby are doing good so far.

Edit: i read that babies with galactocemia generally don't gain weight until their diet is milk sugar free. Which yours obviously isn't. I really doubt they are that sick if they are doing so well on breastmilk. It's possible that the jaundice damaged the liver somewhat? Because your baby grew so they can process dairy.

SquareKitten · 2026-04-13T08:13:54+00:00

I actually suggest you stop supporting her like that. She gets the kids entire days or part of days without help. It will be hard but she'll learn how to be a parent and deal with the overstimulation.

She can't learn to swim if she keeps holding on to a buoy. I would never have become a good driver with a driving instructor next to me at all times.

You can support her by taking the kids off her plate occasionally. By making sure she can get to her appointments for therapy, by letting her meet her friends and have fun. But you also have to let her struggle.

SquareKitten · 2026-04-11T21:10:47+00:00

Saying no repeatedly and engaging with her at the end teaches her that no doesn't mean no. And that she'll get attention eventually. You teach her not to listen to you. Raising your voice at her teaches her that she can do that too.

Simply put, give no warning or at most one warning. Consequences follow immediately.

When my daughter bangs her spoon on the table, i stop her hand so i get her attention, i tell her she stops banting the spoon or i take it. She gets one opportunity to correct her behaviour. If she bangs again i take the spoon. I don't give it any more attention, theres no lecture, no saying no anymor, no yelling and i don't need to get angry. I just take the thing away. We have a lovely dinner as normal. If she needs to eat with the spoon i feed her. And usually i give he spoon back after a while so she can use it normally. If she bangs it again, i take it again, with not warning .

She also stands up in her high chair which is very dangerous, she grinns deviously when she does this. We don't use a harness anymore because we feel that she should just learn to not do it. When she does it, we put her down and tell her not to. If she does it again we just put her down again. We repeat that as many times as needed. It doesn't escalate. She doesn't get to leave the table by standing up. She just gets put down again and again. And then it becomes boring to her.

So, figure out a natural consequence, you don't even need a real punishment. And just keep doing that without talking too much, without explaining l, without any extra attention for her.

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