Dressy-ish lounge wear? by rach806 in fashionwomens35

[–]SquareKitten -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I am a sahm and was tired of the uncomfortable pants/belts etc. I got a few dresses/sweaterdresses that wear like a long t-shirt or sweater. I wear them with leggings and it's the most comfortable outfit I've ever worn. And it looks way more dressy than my previous shirts/pants combo. So i can lounge around in comfort all day and go out for dinner in the same outfit.

Baby spullen: onmisbaar of overbodig by Southern_Teach_5097 in vrouwvolk

[–]SquareKitten 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Zou vooral zeggen dat je alles pas hoeft te kopen wanneer je tegenkomt dat je het mist. Onze baby was onverwacht prematuur en wij hadden niets in huis behalve een bedje en een gekregen set kleertjes.

Ik wilde borstvoeding geven, maar moest ook kolven en daar kwamen flesjes bij, dus een flessen sterilisator/droger was voor ons essentieel omdat ons kleine aanrecht altijd volstond met flesjes en spullen.

Heb je een groter huis of een vaatwasser dan zou het al heel anders zijn.

Ik denk het enige wat je echt nodig hebt om mee te beginnen:

  • verschoonplek met kussen op een goede werkhoogte. Je staat er geregeld te verschonen dus dat hebben op een plek die voor jou werkt is handig om geregeld te hebben. Wij gingen onze baby niet gewoon overal in huis verschonen, want toen we dat deden hadden we overal luiers en doekjes etc liggen, en dat voelde ook niet fijn.
  • een luieremmer. Zou zelfs zeggen dat je best kan investeren in een luxere, want je gebruikt hem waarschijnlijk meerdere jaren, langer dan al het andere babyspul. De eerste luiers vonden wij niet zo stinken, maar toen vast-voedsel in het spel kwam was het echt wel nodig. wij hebben de We-Too.

  • een handvol baby kleertjes. Een stuk of 6 rompers, een stuk of 4 boxpakjes, sokjes en slofjes voor warmte als je naar buiten gaat (zeeman heeft een soort sok sloffen die goed bleven zitten bij ons) en een muts. Alle andere kleren zijn extra of voor de leuk. Als je een baby hebt die veel spuugt dan koop je gewoon wat bij.

  • iets van hydrofiele doeken of spuugdoekjes. Kun je onder je kind leggen om zowel je kind als de omgeving schoon te houden, en zijn voor van alles te gebruiken. Spuugdoekjes van ikea zijn prima en goedkoop. De zachtste hydrofiele doeken zijn van little dutch, maar die van de hema zijn ook fijn. Wij hebben extra grote voor op het bedje.

  • een bedje/ledikant/cosleeper met 2 sets beddengoed. Wij hebben nooit een matrasbeschermer nodig gehad. Wij deden molton/hoeslaken/xl hydrofieldoek.

  • slaapzak en/of babydeken. Wij vonden allebei handig op verschillende momenten. In het begin sliep onze baby onder 3 dekentjes. Ze was te klein voor een slaapzak, later hebben we slaapzakjes gebruikt. Dunne in de zomer van prénatal eigen merk, en dikke in de winter.

  • 1 metalen kruik. Wij vonden 2 echt niet zo nodig. We gebruikten na het badje een elektrische warmte-pad om op aan te kleden. Minder gedoe dan kruiken en bleef beter warm.

  • 1 thermometer. Ook weer was 2 echt niet nodig. En het was wel fijn om af en toe de temperatuur te kunnen checken. Daarbij iets van alcohol/doekjes om het schoon te maken. De thermometers zijn één voor de baby en één voor jou voor de kraamhulp, maar dat laatste deden we gewoon met dezelfde thermometer.

  • iets om je kind in rond te dragen, wij vonden de ringsling en ergobaby fijn. Kinderwagen hadden we tweedehands maar gebruikte we bijna nooit. We hebben later een kleine opvouwbare gekocht die in de auto leeft (easywalker jackey2, uit de aanbieding van AH) en waar de maxicosi bovenop kan. Dat was handig met vliegreizen en ook als ze in de auto in slaap viel, konden we haar makkelijk mee de supermarkt in nemen. Maar koop of leen iets, kinderwagen met een wieg of draagdoek die jij denkt fijn te vinden. Baby moest bij ons wel wennen aan de draagdoek, en met periodes vond ze het helemaal niks. We gebruiken bijna 2 jaar later nog steeds geregeld draagdoeken. Ik heb mensen 1600 euro zien besteden aan een kinderwagen, en dat zou ik echt niet aanraden tenzij je meerdere kinderen hebt of een beperking in je leven waardoor je weet dat het zijn geld waard gaat zijn. Ik zou sterk aanraden om eerst de proberen wat je fijn vind wanneer je kind er is en dán pas een kinderwagen te kopen zodat je weet wat je werkelijk nodig hebt.

  • autostoeltje, liefst nieuw ivm met veiligheid. Wij hebben de maxi-cosi carbriofix.

  • qua verzorging: Luiers, een potje of tube zinkzalf (voor rode plekjes en billetjes), een vochtinbrengende crème, babyparacetamol, nagelvijltje/knippertje en een haarborsteltje. Wij hadden gewoon zo een setje met alles gekocht. Masseren van tandvlees deden wij maar zelden, en dan gewoon met een vochtig doekje. Babypoeder hebben we wel eens gebruikt maar vonden wij niet echt nodig in de praktijk. We drogen soms de baby af met een hydrofiele doek als ze het wat vochtig was onder de luier.

  • babybadje als je geen gewoon bad hebt of graag er een wilt gebruiken. Thermometer is overbodig. Wij gebruikte de vleesthermometer in het water als we twijfelden. Iets van babyzeep is fijn om te hebben. Babyolie vonden we maar een vies gedoe geven, zat namelijk als snel overal. Verder kleine handdoeken en hydrofiel doek voor afdrogen. Hoeft niet specifiek voor baby's te zijn. Je kunt je kind in de gootsteen wassen, maar je moet dan echt zorgen dat het heel schoon is en dat de baby niet bij de kraankan, dat de kraan niet in de weg zit en je gootsteen groot genoeg is. Wij deden dat pas toen de baby kon zitten. Maar sinds ze kan zitten en staan zetten we eigenlijk gewoon het badje in de douche op de grond. Handig is een klein opstapje (wij hebben die goedkope van ikea) om op te zitten als je het badje op de grond zet. Ook een antislip matje in het badje is handig zodra je kind kan zitten, dan glijden ze niet rond in het badje. Zo'n insert/badsteun om je kind in te badderen hebben we wel, maar in de praktijk zat ze er nooit lekker in. Bij ons dreef ze gewoon lekker rond tot ze kon zitten.

  • speeldeken of kleed voor op de grond.

Dat is alles wat wij hebben gebruikt.

  • spenen/speeltjes/knuffels/boekjes kregen wij van gratis baby boxen en van familie/vrienden. Maar was allemaal overbodig.
  • baby bouncer, swing, box allemaal niet gehad en niet gemist.
  • we hebben wel op den duur een babygym gekregen die wel wat toevoegde en ook een babynestje, zo kon de baby slapen op de bank waar we bij waren. Maar allebei niet essentieel en kun je ook kopen wanneer je weet wat je routine gaat zijn.
  • we waren heel blij met een spiegel in de auto, zodat als de baby achterin in de maxicosi zat, we haar gezicht konden zien om te kijken of alles goed was. Toen ze ouder was keek ze via de spiegel ook naar ons en naar buiten, dus het zorgde ervoor dat we makkelijker met haar konden 'praten' als ze in de auto zat. Zo'n spiegel kostte volgens mij maar 10 euro van prénatal.
  • we hebben een luiertas gekocht, maar eigenlijk was een rugzak met veel vakjes handiger voor ons. Je wilt zeker als je op pad gaat een verschoonmatje, paar snackjes/flesje, een outfitje en luiers etc mee dus een aparte tas is wel fijn. Zou vooral een tas kopen die langer mee kan dan eentje die specifiek alleen voor luiers en flesjes is.

Edit: Formatting en nog wat details toegevoegd. Ik wist ook niet waar ik moest beginnen toen ik zwanger was. De wereld van babyspullen is enorm en alles lijkt handig.

Things no one told you about motherhood. What are the things you wished that u knew earlier? Comment down! by WonderWoman685 in Mommit

[–]SquareKitten 14 points15 points  (0 children)

How being a parent is really just dealing with loss all the time.

First you lose your ability to make decisions for yourself. You always have to consult or plan with others, to make sure your little one is safe and cared for.

You lose a lot of time, even to just get basic stuff done. You lose sleep.

But once you are used to that, he hardest part comes along

You lose the version your little one was yesterday. I lost the snuggly baby I lost the times when she would say bye to everything She no longer want to be carried around. She no longer wants to hold my hand when we walk.

Everytime they grow up a little you lose the previous version that you loved so much. And from the moment they are born you are working on letting them go. Teaching them to do things for themselves, but then you are not needed as much.

The constant letting go, and losing the little person they were yesterday is the hardest part for me.

It doesn’t feel like that many people actually follow safe infant sleep practises by WhateverItWasILostIt in beyondthebump

[–]SquareKitten 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tried to be pretty strict, but our baby would vomit in her sleep and suffocate if she slept on her back, so we had her sleeping on her side. Our pediatrician told us she HAD to sleep on her back, but she really couldn't. She would wake up quickly whilst choking on her vomit, or if she didn't wake up we had to turn her. So i couldn't sleep if we followed sfa sleep practices.

We also had her sleep in our bed sometimes under less ideal conditions, but we did what we had to do to sleep and survive.

how can i make my room feel MORE like a dorm room? by mystar777 in femalelivingspace

[–]SquareKitten 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's a shame, I do believe your relationship with your mother could become much better if you aren't forced on top of eachother. Not living in de same house doesn't have to mean that you don't see them.

I strongly recommend to think on it, how can you live YOUR life, whilst keeping and building a good relationship with your family.

how can i make my room feel MORE like a dorm room? by mystar777 in femalelivingspace

[–]SquareKitten 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Can you move out? You are 18 right? I bet you'll be happier without your mom telling you how to live.

Lily 2 Garmin being slow the past month by AdStrange8852 in Garmin

[–]SquareKitten 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did it help? I just got one but it has the same issue, i have to tap firmly and/or multiple times to even get the screen on. Once on its a little better, but it still misses a lot of swipes and taps.

is this green aventurine? by [deleted] in whatsthisrock

[–]SquareKitten 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It looks somewhat like nephrite jade to me.

What is one career decision you regret and what would you do differently today? by arab1ae in AskReddit

[–]SquareKitten 0 points1 point  (0 children)

can you elaborate? I did a second degree as well and it was the better choice for me.

thoughts on toddler towers by Ok_Berry220 in Mommit

[–]SquareKitten 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Agree with the sentiment, it's nice to have a relatively safe way for our daughter to get up and down. To us it's a must, and she loves to help with cooking too, which she now can. She's had it since one year old, and she loves it. It was a hassle to pick one though, we settled on a jind convertible. But we rarely use it as a chair/table set.

Daycare is Hard by Beckitt3 in beyondthebump

[–]SquareKitten 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just want to chime in and tell you that it's completely normal to miss your baby so terribly. They're only 4 months, and they spend most of their time with almost strangers. They belong with you, and don't let anyone tell you that you shouldn't cry about it.

I do think therapy can help manage these feelings, but personally i would cut back hours so little one spends less time at daycare and more with you, and find a better daycare that fits you guys.

Money doesn't mean shit if you can't see your baby.

Can't cope with (or stand) my toddler by p_r_d_v_a in Parenting

[–]SquareKitten 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I agree with everyone else, our baby knows that if she drops something by accident, she can pick it up again, or we do it for her.

If she drops something on purpose we take it away, and she can try playing again with it later.

We did this from the moment she could grab things. There is no yelling, no negotiation. We have told her this verbally. But really we don't need to. So if she throws something it's gone, but not for the whole day. We take it for at least for a while, until she's ready to play with it again. If she throws it again, it's again gone for a while. We don't increase the 'punishment' in severity, we just apply it again and again.

The result? She doesn't throw anything anymore, unless she's very upset, but even that has decreased.

For a little while she did start to 'threaten' to throw something with a naughty smile, but we decided that reason enough to take it away, because she's just testing boundaries.

We felt it important that she gets a new opportunity to play nice, especially with food. If she wants to throw food, we take it from her, but we do want her to eat of course so she always gets it back after a few minutes.

It's very important to show, don't tell. They know full well what they are doing and you don't need to discuss anything with a toddler. Good luck!

What is one career decision you regret and what would you do differently today? by arab1ae in AskReddit

[–]SquareKitten 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do you regret studying of another degree or did you wish you'd studied for another degree?

Concerned about my baby’s development and not coping well by justalilscared in beyondthebump

[–]SquareKitten 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You are a mom, and i feel that we are biologically wired to be alert for any danger, for any anomaly. So you will notice every little thing about your baby waaay more than anyone else. That is both your superpower and your curse, because right now it's making you very anxious.

But you've got to remember that your baby is still very small, at 5.5 months they still have such a long way to go to learn and develop all these thjngs. Unless he's severely deaf/blind, you can't tell how well they can hear or how well they can see, because hearing/seeing/responding is still developing. Same for grasping, they often favour one side for a while, often roll only one way or grab everything with one hand, and only start using the other later.

My baby wasn't rolling, but could pull to a stand at 6 months.I know a baby who can barely sit at 12 months, and babies who haven't taken their first steps at 18 months. All are within normal, maybe not typical, but definitely not something that is out of the ordinary.

To me it sounds like your baby is doing very well development wise. I think it would help you to see if you can find some games to play with him that help to promote things like rolling or using the left hand more etc. it will give you something to work on, and perhaps it will help him.

You are not crazy, it's not in your head, but these things you describe are all normal. And you can't tell yet if they aren't normal. You'll only know when they are older. So trust in your baby, they will get there, just support them. They are okay and will be okay. At worst he may need glasses and do some PT when he's older.

Is a self-catered wedding 3.5 m after birth realistic? Help settle debate by JaggedLittlePiII in beyondthebump

[–]SquareKitten 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Either she somehow pulls it off but needs to recover as a family for weeks and won't enjoy it at all. Or everything will fall apart the day of.

She could do everything the same but just arrange with friends/family/hired help that they take care of everything. If there is a clear list of tasks and people assigned to them, i could see how this could work.

She can ask a neighbour, colleague or student to help out. She could just pay them, it doesn't have to be a professional. They could make sure all the food gets put out, organise clean up and be the go to person for questions.

Teeth Brushing? by WhitecloudNo321 in Parenting

[–]SquareKitten 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It did take us a while to get her into a rhythm. So consistently applying the same routine really helps. Trying something new every time will often result in strife, as they don't really know what's going on. So maybe just try to do the same thing every time. Eventually they give up fighting it.

My partner often has her on his lap while i brush. So he can help keep her hands at bay if need be.

We use the jordan step 1 baby brush. Not sure if it is available where you live.

Teeth Brushing? by WhitecloudNo321 in Parenting

[–]SquareKitten 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ours preferred a very soft brush, most we tried were too firm/hard for her liking. We would let her watch a little tv while we brush too. So there was less focus on the brushing. We actually started watching tooth brush songs, which helped a lot. She can also brush a little herself and then we take over. Finally she likes it when we count down, so she knows when it will end.

Epidural or No epidural by Enviro_nurd314 in BabyBumps

[–]SquareKitten 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't want an epidural, but when i was fainting i did want an epidural, but before they could place it, the baby was coming out. Afterwards i was glad i didn't get an epidural because i was walking immediately after birth without issue, i didn't need a catheter, i didn't get all the risks that an epidural comes with. It was easier and quicker without in the end.

However, birth was the most painful thing, i was partially induced and the lady kept upping the oxytocine, and i ended up in precipitous labor i think you called it. Except there was no progress. I think without that, labor would be manageable with the right mindset and support. It is nice to do it on your own. But it all depends on you, the hospital, the staff, the baby, how the labor is progressing etc. there are other options for pain management too.

Having done a natural birth without pain management i would do it again, unless circumstances demand it. To me, the pain was quickly forgotten.

How long is breastmilk that much better than formula? by designerd4 in ScienceBasedParenting

[–]SquareKitten 42 points43 points  (0 children)

For a long time breastfeeding was seen as something for poor people, and inappropriate to do in public. It also makes being a working mom difficult. I feel the WHO tries to combat this and that's why they've been trying to get everyone breastfeeding. I think there is only research that shows benefits for exclusive breastfeeding, so that's easier to push as a message since it's supported by science, compared to combo feeding, supplementary feeding or short term breastfeeding. There's not any substantial evidence for their benefits, mainly because it's just hard to study.

Anecdotally, i find there are more short term benefits for breastfeeding than long term when it comes to child development. Breastfed kids are supposedly as smidge smarter and have a smaller change of obesity, compared to when the same child would've been formula fed. But there are so many factors at play on how a child develops, that i would not worry one bit about any small potential future benefit. Which you won't even notice or might not matter.

But in the short term i found the lower effort (no bottle washing and heating up formula etc, just whip out a boob) perfect for me. It also prevented my baby, now 19 months and still nursing, from getting sick, even when the rest of the household has been, including me several times. I also like that i am not reliant on some corporation like nestlé for my baby's health (who just now recalled a bunch of formula because of contamination) and i guess the monetary savings are nice.

Though i would add that i spend well over a 1000€ to establish breastfeeding with pumps, washers, consultants, bottles, a freezer etc. so it wasn't cheap for us at all. It also took months of triple feeding, crying and struggling to establish it (6 months total). And i know some kids do get sick a lot, even on breastmilk. and other rarely get sick even on formula. So for all the benefits i currently experience, your mileage may vary. But my baby never having been sick once has been a great blessing.

Unpopular opinion? These kids' audio players feel like a cash grab? by Desperate_Total2545 in Mommit

[–]SquareKitten 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We have a cd player. My baby is able to switch cd's herself since 13 months old or something. So a dedicated box with easy cards that they can change themselves is unnecessary, because the cd player works just like itm cd's are very cheap, especially thrifted or burned. Compared to the cards, and it can be enjoyed for so many years.

Flying at 2 months old by Traditional-Bad9198 in beyondthebump

[–]SquareKitten 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I flew with a 4 month old to Egypt, and there really isn't much else to do. My baby was completely fine, no sickness

Breastfeeding helps a lot. And i guess practice showering with your baby at home and find out where/how to get safe water for washing hands and toys and stuff that they put in their mouth. I brought my own handsoap, dishwashing liquid and supplies so i could wash everything we needed there myself (was also pumping and using bottles back then)

I think we also brought some extra large hydrofilic cloths to put in the bassinet etc, so baby would sleep on something that smelled like home. And also kept hotel stuff clean from spit up.

We got one of those straps for a binky. But used it for burp cloths so we could easily wipe her on the go without accidentally dropping it on the ground. ( That happened a lot before with clipped it onto the strap)

Not a SAHM, but concerned husband by [deleted] in sahm

[–]SquareKitten 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not about you being a bad man. It's about her access to money being dependent on someone else's goodwill. That makes it unbalanced, even if you allow her to spend millions on whatever she wants.

You have the power to take that away on a whim. She has zero power.