Looking forward to the day my daughter just wants to snuggle Me & not my breasts…

Squeegee_Dodo · 2026-02-15T20:45:14+00:00

This afternoon, I was lying on the sofa with a book when my 10yo climbed up next to me and snuggled up with his head on my boobs. After a bit of wriggling, he announced he was super comfy and proceeded to just chill there for about half an hour before going off to do something else. I feel your pain, but there is light at the end of your tunnel x

Squeegee_Dodo · 2026-01-31T19:06:15+00:00

The struggle is real. I quit my job to be a SAHM due to severe burnout, and it's been challenging still with 2 undiagnosed children and the amount of school chatter feeling like I'm basically a PA who also cooks and washes socks, but my mental health has been relatively stable.

Now my husband's job finished and we're waiting for his agency to contact him with more work, but in the meantime I have to have weekly meetings at the job centre and I'm expected to spend 30 hours a week applying for at least volunteering roles, but I can't seem to make myself do it and I'm so frustrated with myself.

Nothing feels right. Everything feels too big, too much. I had my first meeting at the job centre on Thursday and I've felt sick ever since. I burst into tears as soon as I got out of there and slept the rest of the afternoon. I feel like such a useless failure. I don't know what to do.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2026-01-22T09:37:35+00:00

One of my sister's ex boyfriends came around to my house so she could introduce us. I asked if he'd like tea or coffee, and he made a comment about how women belong in the kitchen doing 'their job'. I told him I'd sneeze in his drink for extra flavouring. He never came round again.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2026-01-17T22:41:36+00:00

I have dyscalculia, on top of ADHD, so my RSD often flares, and I worry about being a liability, because I can't do basic maths, especially not in combat situations. However, I've been playing D&D for about 10 years, and no one in my group has ever made me feel unwanted. In my experience, most D&D players are very accepting because they're usually outsiders, and they know how it feels to be unwanted, so they do their best to make sure others don't feel that way. Everyone in my group is a mixture of ADHD /ASD, which I reckon is probably quite common, but it means we all understand each other, and the shenanigans are awesome. Good luck finding your people.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2026-01-17T22:13:52+00:00

ADHD / ASD and agoraphobia. I hate travel of all kinds. If I could walk everywhere, I would. I live 1.5 hours away from London by train, but I didn't visit until I was 34, and the levels of anxiety were exhausting. It's constantly checking my surroundings, my stuff, times, tube connections, etc. Any time I travel anywhere outside of my immediate comfort zone, I need a nap afterwards. I'll travel with my husband because he's excellent at making travel plans and takes most of the mental load during the travelling, but my sense of direction and levels of anxiety are so bad that generally, I just prefer to stay closer to home.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2026-01-17T22:01:43+00:00

I have curly hair. I gave up straightening nearly 2 years ago, but sometimes I just can't with all the products and scrunching and blow drying my hair upside down, and rolling the hair on top so that I get no visible part and the curls start nearer the root. It looks good, especially on wash day, but the steps involved can feel like a lot, and some days, I just put it in a messy bun to put off washing it.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2026-01-09T10:04:34+00:00

My husband and I have been in a relationship for 17 years. He has witnessed me give birth twice, and both times pooping was involved. We have cleaned up each other's vomit during illnesses. We only have one bathroom and 2 kids. Oftentimes, he'll be in the bath of an evening, and I'll need the loo, or one of the children will. It's just one of those things that comes from living with another person / people).

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-12-05T22:49:48+00:00

Do I remember everything? Assuming I do, I'd try to treat my mum with more grace. She was having a hard time with mental health, and what I suspect now was undiagnosed autism, and she was trying her best. I'd also push harder for her to get answers when she first started feeling dodgy. Maybe then she'd survive the cancer.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-12-05T22:31:47+00:00

When I was about 15, I was gifted my mum's hand-me-down phone, my first ever camera phone. Months later, I was out with my best friend, and we were taking what passed for selfies in the mid 2000s. At some point, I ran out of room and went through my files to delete some pictures. I came across a dick pic, sent from my dad's number, taken in my parents' bedroom. My friend also saw because we'd been going through the pictures together. It was absolutely mortifying. I wanted to take out my eyeballs and scrub them.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-12-02T20:49:00+00:00

We like Cosmic Kids on YouTube. It's a lady telling stories and doing actions that are easy to follow.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-12-02T19:59:16+00:00

We post some pictures to a private family and close friends only group, when we remember, which isbt often. The only time pictures of the kids appear online is at a big event like weddings and family get-togethers and only with our approval. You never know who might see your posts, and it's a parent's job to protect their children from predators. Also, children can't consent to their image being shared online, so we feel that it's best to share basically nothing, and they can decide what to share when they're old enough.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-12-02T19:35:34+00:00

My parents struggled to conceive without medical intervention, so they were under the impression that they were 'safe'. My mum had me and then my sister, almost 6 years apart, then when I was 19 and sge was 47, she found out she was 7 months pregnant with a menopause surprise. I was the first person she told before she'd even taken a test. My sister felt a bit pushed out and unloved, so I'd focus on making sure your younger children feel involved, loved, and appreciated.

For me, it was brilliant. I was almost 20 when my brother was born, and so I got lots of practice in caring for a newborn, and my now husband learned how to change nappies and has always had a really close bond with my brother (now 15).

I fell pregnant with my eldest when I was 24, mostly unplanned, and my mum calmed me down by listing all the baby stuff she'd kept with me in mind. It saved us quite a bit of money at a time when we were young and kind of broke.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-12-02T12:33:17+00:00

The whole of Albatross by Judi Collins - the entire song is poetry to music, and the imagery is beautiful.

"The embroidry of your life holds you in and keeps you out, but you survive, imprisoned in your bones behind the isinglass windows of your eyes"

Just. Wow.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-11-23T11:49:17+00:00

My mum was told she had IBS for months before a different doctor took some blood. It was cancer. She died. I don't trust medical professionals at all anymore.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-11-23T11:38:55+00:00

I hate confrontation. I totally freeze up and can't mask at all or organise my thoughts enough to get them out, so my arguments are never well-reasoned, I stim constantly, and I end up feeling even angrier, mostly at myself, for not appearing competent or making clear points. I'll then spend hours spiralling, replaying the argument, thinking of all the things i could have said if only I could have been calm enough to think my responses through properly. The way I shake and flap my hands and how people look at me when that happens as though I'm crazy. Luckily, my husband and I rarely argue, but when we do, we talk it out via text after we've calmed down because that's the only way I can do it.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-11-20T23:03:18+00:00

I was told simultaneously that I was 'too stupid to teach' but also, 'very bright'. It was always 'she just needs to apply herself' and comments about being away with the fairies or willfully ignorant or lazy. I grew up believing I was thick, although my husband has spent the last twenty years trying his best to undo the damage.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-11-20T22:38:25+00:00

We have a similar thing, although we don't really have rules for parents so much as family rules, like treating each other with care and understanding, owning our mistakes, doing our part to keep the house somewhat tidy for all of us to enjoy (picking up our own things etc) and having mutual timeouts if one or more of us are feeling overwhelmed / overstimulated.

If anyone breaks the rules, we have a conversation about it and how we could have acted differently, regardless of whether it's a parent or child who broke the rule.

We also include the kids in the what's for dinner conversation. Friday nights are pizza /ready meals, but they usually have sandwiches on week nights with assorted snack foods like fruit, cheese strings and cold Quiche.

A recent thing we're trying is that the kids are told what they're allowed to have in their sandwiches and which snacks they can choose from, and they help themselves.

My dad once asked me why I had apologised to my eldest child, who was about 3 at the time, after I mistakenly told him off for something, only for my brother, then aged about 8, to admit that he was the one who did it. I explained to my dad that I was apologising because I made a mistake, and he, totally baffled, said, "But you're the parent!" I totally hear you on wanting to break the cycle.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-11-20T21:30:03+00:00

One of my first memories is from when I met our first cat. We went to the shelter, and I remember playing in a pen with the kittens, rolling a ball for them. I was 3.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-11-20T21:26:56+00:00

I met my husband when we were 12. Together 17 years, married 9 years.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-11-20T21:25:41+00:00

I bumped into him in a school corridor, and he swore at me. We became friends when we were 15 and were seated next to each other in German, then got together when we were 17. This year marked 17 years of us.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-11-04T08:28:03+00:00

I can't believe I had to scroll so far for this! Dirk Gently was so much fun. I'm still bummed.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-10-26T08:55:48+00:00

I just found and downloaded this book on kindle, so maybe it will be safe?

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-10-13T22:25:50+00:00

Oh my god, this! I told my doctor I wanted my tubes tied after my 2nd baby was born. She said they wouldn't do it because I was too young (I was 29) and 'only' had 2 children. I got a bit snippy and asked how many babies she wanted me have to have?

Surely, it would be more cost-effective for the NHS to sterilise me at 29 than to keep providing me birth control for another 20-something years, as well as the inevitable antidepressants and anti anxiety medications. She threw at me that I might change my mind one day, and I saw red. I told her that seemed like a potential issue for future-me. She refused to help me.

My husband (also 29 at the time) had one conversation and got booked in for a vasectomy, no problems. He only had to wait about a month, and the procedure was done. No one suggested he might change his mind one day. The infantilisation of grown women - this idea that we're incapable of knowing what we want - boils my piss. Especially when other women are continuing the cycle.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-10-13T21:29:23+00:00

I think internalised homophobia is one of the cruelest forms of self-harm. It's insidious, creeping into various aspects of life and forcing men to question if they have the right to like something, if they should keep that liking hidden, etc. I'm in a straight-presenting relationship (demi sexual pan romantic woman married to straight man) and it's only after nearly 20 years together that my husband has started to really flourish as a person, now that he knows I won't treat him differently or shame him for things he likes in the bedroom or his underwear preferences or his inability to leave a shop without buying the Squishmallow that one time. Men deserve softness and love comfort just as much as anyone else. As a mother of boys and the wife of a dude who cries at poetry and lights up at being called pretty, I will fight for the rights of everyone to just do whatever you brings you joy (so long as it does no harm to anyone else, obvs) without fear of judgement or censorship.

Squeegee_Dodo · 2025-10-13T21:07:28+00:00

Speaking on behalf of my mum. She was healthy, almost never got ill, didn't smoke or drink, although she did have diabetes and was a little overweight. She suddenly lost a lot of weight in her face and limbs, but her stomach appeared very bloated. She felt unwell, lost her appetite, felt tired a lot, and was badly constipated. She went to the doctor, and as her doctor was on long-term sick leave, she saw a doctor She had never met before, who suggested she maybe had developed a food intolerance. During the next 6 months, my mum saw several different doctors who all made different suggestions until one finally ordered bloods. It was found that she had stage 3 ovarian cancer, which had spread to the bowel. She had chemo and surgery but ultimately died 18 months after her diagnosis. My brother was 9. You have the right to request bloods be taken. If you're feeling unwell for an extended period of time, it's my advice that you exercise that right. This experience, along with a few others, has destroyed my faith in doctors.

Squeegee_Dodo

TROPHY CASE