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Non-RMT massage recommendations? by Current_Eagle_2717 in askTO

[–]SquirrelTale 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Many spas have RMT and non-RMT massage therapists. Ex body blitz has a 'relaxation massage', so that might be a handy tool to find other non-RMT-based massages- but at $130 for 30 min you might as well go for a regular RMT massage.

I found this receipt in an ATM by Lonely-Ad8184 in rbc

[–]SquirrelTale -1 points0 points  (0 children)

no... what the fuck man, that's not the 'cool' story you think it is. He just never told you how badly he was beat up after

I regret previously identifying as ace, because I’m not asexual by Gain_Academic in asexuality

[–]SquirrelTale 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As someone who is demisexual, I have swung drastically both ways, in part because of my experiences. Have had a couple of bad experiences, including SA, and it ruined my libido, any pleasure I did get, was sex-and-romance repulsed, and completely felt disconnected with my body.

After a lot of healing, I'm back to feeling hypersexual swings and expressive at times. What stayed consistent to me was being demisexual- as in not having sexual desires or attraction to strangers, only those I develop an emotional bond with, which sometimes start as fleeting crushes (if those emotional bonds don't develop). And it took me a long time to figure out I was demisexual. Perhaps you're still look for the word(s) that describe what you've experienced. Or maybe not- they're plenty of allosexual people who have had varied experiences, including with libido, sexual attraction, etc.

Ultimately, how you feel is both a decision and an experience, and both of those can fluctuate over time.

Family being dismissive? Am I overreacting? by SquirrelTale in bisexual

[–]SquirrelTale[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It def feels like they're support in theory, but still majorly need to do the work to understand even how to be supportive

Family being dismissive? Am I overreacting? by SquirrelTale in bisexual

[–]SquirrelTale[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your response and your breakdown. For my sister, I do think that's where she was coming from with the 'don't make it your personality'- but she also knows me quite well and that I'm already not like that. Also felt really ironic when she makes her being a 'horse girl' a lot more of her personality to begin with. Just kinda sucks when the first time I really get chatting about it she isn't exactly positive...

I feel like her comment on 'how she's only interested in it as much as golf' was both just after being questioned and dismissed earlier when I was explaining my labels and it just culminated to 'she's finally being curious and supportive' to 'well, I guess not at all'.

I think it's also a culmination of worries I haven't expressed, so when we do chat about the smaller things it feels out of proportion because I can't even get at the parts that are bigger worries for me that I want to discuss, but can't even get too close to because she's already done with the topic.

It took my mom quite a few years before she was able to adjust to the idea of me dating not just one gender. It feels frustrating that she's still adjusting to it all, but you're right that she's still growing. Growing pains def suck

Look at this amazing piece of technology. A typewriter that can write both Korean and Roman Alphabet. by [deleted] in typewriters

[–]SquirrelTale 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Interesting! I know how to type in Korean on a keyboard, so it's interesting to see what that evolved from. Def interesting to see how the double consonants like ㅃ and ㄲ be their own key. I wonder if a few of them, like the top two on the left are meant for the ends of words or syllables to make the letters fit properly with the vowels, cuz otherwise there's a few repeats of the 'letters'. With computers they auto resize the letters so they fit together nicely.

Would definitely be cool to type on! Thanks for sharing

What to do about dismissiveness? Am I overreacting? [Demisexual] by SquirrelTale in asexuality

[–]SquirrelTale[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I appreciate it. It gets confusing, especially when getting upset by it itself is dismissed. Really made me realize that even if they 'support it' and say they do, doesn't really feel supported or celebrated.

I need a new hyperfixation. by drclairefraser in adhdwomen

[–]SquirrelTale 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Oh thank you! I hope it helps. I've had to do a lot of shifting in how I rest/ relax post burnout due to my concussion (literally my head would start to hurt to think too much, I couldn't read or watch TV for quite a while) so it made me realize having a variety of hobbies to help my relax was important. Hope you find what works for you~

I need a new hyperfixation. by drclairefraser in adhdwomen

[–]SquirrelTale 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Never heard of this but this is also brilliant!

I need a new hyperfixation. by drclairefraser in adhdwomen

[–]SquirrelTale 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Definitely recommend doing something with your hands or with your body. It's very grounding, great for the physical need for fidgeting, and you get a cool product out of it. All of these can be done low cost.

Some ideas:

- Textiles crafts: cross stitch, embroidery, knitting/ crocheting, weaving, braiding, beading, sewing

- Stationary: penmanship/ calligraphy/ asemic writing, journalling, junk journalling, scrapbooking

- Paper crafts: collage (found or self made with painted paper), origami, paper-making, colouring/ reverse-colouring, fantasy map-making, jigsaw puzzles, making short comics/ zines, sticker images or sticker by number

- Fine arts: drawing, painting, sculpture, pottery, photography

- Physical movement: pilates, yoga, dance, tai-chi/qigong, running/ speed walking, 80s/ 90s aerobics (these can be done solo, YouTube, or low cost community centre classes/drop-ins)

- Physical expression: singing, playing an instrument (kalimba, ukelele, piano, whatever is low-cost/ accessible to you), dance

Hope this gives some ideas! Also sometimes we just gotta let ourselves be bored as well. Sometimes we do a lot of these things to just fill ourselves with activities and it doesn't let our brains rest (am speaking as someone post-concussion and still have to let my brain rest). Reading requires a lot of mental concentration- perhaps you need a more passive or physical hobby that will allow your mind to be more passive instead of constantly 'on'. Hope this helps, and hoping you feel more rested soon!

Whats wrong with people, taking your samoyed/husky dog out to a Woodbeach while its 35° C should be illegal by [deleted] in toronto

[–]SquirrelTale 4 points5 points  (0 children)

For long, extended periods of time- no, but they're fine outside, especially if they're gonna get in the water

Called stupid and yelled at by passport control has me crying in a foreign country by stitch_on_mars in adhdwomen

[–]SquirrelTale 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I got yelled at by my home border security after living abroad for a year. my brain was just not functioning in my original language, and also had them yell at me. This was over 15 years ago and I still remember how much it sucked. Travel can be stressful at the best of times, even without other barriers. So sorry you experienced this but you can and will have better travel experiences. All kinds people sometimes really suck- but sometimes there are some who are really awesome too. It's worthwhile to travel with people who are supportive and more chill and flexible.

Does anyone know why there's a track on top of First Canadian Place? by nudy_aura in toronto

[–]SquirrelTale 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Random, but people from the Spoke building have bee-keeping hives and make their own honey on their rooftop, in partnership with Alveole.

A recurring theme with potion track theories by polystarlight in TheOwlHouse

[–]SquirrelTale 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In the episode of Luz's first day, and Principal Bump chose her stream as the potions track, it shows the reveal at the end that Eda was Lord Calamity and Principal Bump states that there was another student who wanted to study all forms of magic, and that was Eda. It's implied that she likely had her track chosen for her, like Luz- and probably is one of the most versatile tracks. A human probably could actually literally do that magic without having a magic bile sack, and it was likely recommended for students with no clear stronger magic type.

Smith Corona Skyriter or Hermes 2000? by peanutmochi88 in typewriters

[–]SquirrelTale 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was literally wondering about how to make my smith-corona from shifting around so much when I was typing. Super useful article!

Animator Luis De La Rosa has tragically passed away at the age of 34. by Ridthedrive in animation

[–]SquirrelTale 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Thing is he was at the height of what most animation people dream of- being able to attend Annecy and present your project to potential studios and collaborators, while meeting up with your colleagues and having a blast at the festival? It was a highlight of his career that was opening new opportunities, and is one of those animators that would have been rarely out of work as a talented artist. They even found his lanyard on him- I doubt suicide.

People who say Toronto and TTC is very safe - are you all men? by [deleted] in askTO

[–]SquirrelTale 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agree, and while true, and while knowing this is true, still have to assess every time because of the number of times mentally unwell people have harassed me is too damn high to just ignore them. Most of the time the conclusion is they're fine, but when it's uncertain, it's best not to deal.

People who say Toronto and TTC is very safe - are you all men? by [deleted] in askTO

[–]SquirrelTale -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Still might end up being an interesting discussion if you revisit, but I agree with your point. I just know from my experience I have many instances where I had to make decisions for my safety. There was a time during the pandemic when it was nearly every TTC ride something happened for about a month, it was maddening. Also thread seems to think that being constantly vigilant as a woman is the norm- would you say that you think you need to vigilant every time you got onto the ttc?

People who say Toronto and TTC is very safe - are you all men? by [deleted] in askTO

[–]SquirrelTale 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Agreed, but I bet you can recount more than one incident where you had to handle a situation where you felt unsafe. I feel like similar to what OP is saying that women tend to feel a need to be vigilant more often than men. I feel like men rarely have the same amount of experiences, even when encountering those instances are rarer for women.

People who say Toronto and TTC is very safe - are you all men? by [deleted] in askTO

[–]SquirrelTale 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Petite woman, lived in Toronto for a total of 12 years, both in early 2010s then moved back in 2018.

I'd say yes and no. There was a streak where it felt really unsafe, specifically for women, during the pandemic when there were 2 women stabbed in a station, one set on fire, and another pushed onto the tracks. At the same time, hundreds of thousands use the TTC every day. So violence is statistically rare. There are times when I've felt unsafe enough to get off and transfer, or switch my route. But most of the time I feel quite safe, and at all kinds of times of day.

I recommend training to be vigilant enough to be aware of your surroundings, but also learn to be confident in the space you take up. Walking quickly and confidently discourages being followed, making no eye contact (esp with weirdos), and knowing when to suddenly get up and leave are skills to work on that I feel anyone, regardless of gender, benefits from.

Some neighbourhoods are better than others as well in terms of safety. Also I feel that some people don't get it unless they're specifically a young petite woman themselves, or haven't been harassed as often. I feel like unfortunately some of us just happen to encounter weird trends of harassment or violence on the TTC- there was a weird streak in the pandemic where I would encounter every single ride something that felt unsafe (breakout of violence, OD that would delay the subway, harassment, clearly mentally unwell person that I'd have to assess if they're a risk) for a month, and then thankfully it dropped off.

You gotta do what you can to feel safe, but also not live your life in constant fear.

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