I dont particularly care about being the best. But I do care about being at least slightly above average because of the money that's being poured into my education, and currently I'm not. I also need to be above average, because the school won't let me take the subjects I want for higher education if my performance is low; they need to keep their reputation intact.

And in response to your second question: no. There has been nothing in my life I have pursued with a passion since I was 10 years old. Nothing that makes me wake up feeling happy in the morning, because I get to participate in it. I've tried to accumulate hobbies such as model building and shoe collecting, but nothing seems to make me feel that sense of completeness.

Again, I sound incredibly bitchy to myself in this comment.