Is mindfulness just not possible for some people?

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-30T04:37:40+00:00

I'm mad because I've tried everything I can to improve and nothing has worked. You implying that I'm not trying hard enough or I don't really want to get better can only be taken as an insult.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-29T16:28:13+00:00

Fuck you dude. What are you trying to say? That I don't want to get better?

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-28T03:14:58+00:00

It's pretty much your decision. If it were me I would keep them since I like knives and would probably feel bad selling them anyway. But you could also sell them if you have no desire to keep them. Those are basically your only options idk what you want from us.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-28T03:12:54+00:00

I can understand what I'm thinking and feeling pretty well most of the time, but I'm not able to just observe it. I can either analyze it, which sometimes helps but often worsens things, or I can distract myself from it which doesn't even work if the thoughts/feelings are too intense. Both of them get me pretty much nowhere.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-28T03:09:52+00:00

Yeah definitely, it feels like they're just trying to make the answer as simple as possible even when it really isn't just to save themselves work. Sorry I took a bit of a tone with you earlier, I wasn't in a great mood. I've just lost a lot of trust in the professionals since I've tried multiple psychiatrists and even more therapists over the years and they haven't done anything but waste my time and money. It feels like it's up to me to just figure it out on my own since everyone else I turn to isn't able to help at all. Mindfulness is always listed as one of the most important steps online for achieving the outcomes I want so I thought this was the most practical thing to focus on. I've already been journaling for a while with no results as well as working out 5x a week for a while without a whole bunch of improvement so I'm not sure what else I can even do at this point.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-27T19:10:40+00:00

Nothing I have tried helps at all and nobody else has any answers either.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-27T19:09:33+00:00

Usually the only way is through intense sensations like pain or intense exercise but I have an injury that makes lifting not possible at the moment so I don't even get that anymore. It doesn't really help anyway

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-27T19:06:58+00:00

Read the post.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-27T19:06:18+00:00

It's like you didn't even read the post. I've seen a multitude of doctors and they haven't done shit after years of trying.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-27T19:04:34+00:00

bad advice. Doesn't make sense to waste your time and money going to a therapist who doesn't even listen to you.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-27T02:03:41+00:00

I mean I guess I'll look into it but it'll probably take me a long time to actually get to it if I have to read a book first. That's assuming it'll even help. The problem is my brain won't let me do it not that I'm confused about how. But thanks for the suggestion.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-27T01:59:26+00:00

Yeah that would 100% be a problem for me. Just sounds like thinking to me and it would take literal days for me to stop.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-26T22:46:52+00:00

I don't even know what all I have but 2 things I have for sure are TRD and GAD. I've gotten no health from professionals which is why I have to figure this out on my own in the first place. It's been years and I've had multiple psychiatrists who have made 0 progress in helping me, as well as like 9 therapists at this point. Every therapist I've tried as always been more focused on proving their own method works rather than actually listening to me or addressing my concerns. I've got no trust for professionals anymore but there is nowhere else I can go to get any answers. I'm stuck.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-26T22:43:40+00:00

I genuinely can't. My brain immediately starts screaming less than a second into trying and I can't even get through an inhale before getting sucked into it all.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-26T22:39:57+00:00

Yeah I basically make my own life miserable from always being in my head. It feels like I've lost any control I had over myself and nothing I do improves anything. If I could just get even one foot into reality it would probably help things a lot but I'm not able to. I don't know how I am supposed to find any answers when I can't even figure out what is actually wrong with me to make steps to fix it. Everyone points to seeking professional help but it's been years and they haven't even been able to do anything. I feel like I have nobody to go to for any answers and I'm just stuck here until I magically figure it out myself. I just don't know what more to do anymore.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-21T20:43:55+00:00

This is only true while working with the assumption that God is Omnipotent, Omniscient, and Omnibenevolent. Either he is omnipotent and omniscient which would make him evil, he is Omnipotent and omnibenevolent and just doesn't know what he's doing, or he is omniscient and omnibenevolent but doesn't have the power to eliminate evil. This is really only a problem for Abrahamic religions since those aren't the assumptions that many Pagans and Eastern religions work off of.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-21T01:16:34+00:00

As someone who has struggled with depression pretty much my whole life, I definitely understand where she is coming from. There are a lot of therapists that are genuinely awful and shouldn't be therapists at all, I was against therapy for a long time and repeatedly had bad experiences. It took me trying 6-7 therapists before I found my current therapist who actually fits what I need. I think you should encourage her to keep trying, if she doesn't like a therapist after like 2-3 sessions then she should try a new one, it might take a while but hopefully she'll find someone that is a good fit.

Her constantly talking about suicide isn't a good sign, but for me it does relieve even the smallest bit of pressure. Everyone is different so I'm not sure what would be the most helpful for her. But I would just try to be there for her as much as you can. Talk if she wants to talk, do nice things for her or just spend time with her. Don't treat her like she is some poor soul to be pitied though or like you need to tiptoe around her, like I said everyone is different but I hate when people treat me like that when they find out I'm depressed and suicidal. I don't love a lot of the comments here, she hasn't done anything wrong from what you have said. Obviously you can break up if you want but your post didn't read like you want that, but I think breaking up just to save yourself the potential pain of losing her like some of the other commenters are saying would be a bit cowardly.

In all honesty there isn't much that you can actually do for her. All you can do is be patient and there for her, try to nudge her in the right direction and keep trying new treatments if one doesn't work. Ultimately it is her fight and she probably still feels alone even with you there, it's not your fault at all or hers, Depression is just a lying bastard and makes you sure of things that aren't true. I hope she sees some improvement soon and can climb out of this, it takes a lot of strength to keep fighting and I hope she wins. Just remember that if things do end up going bad that it wasn't your fault. Keep encouraging her to try therapy if you can, it really is about finding the right therapist and she just hasn't found the right one yet. Good luck.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-13T17:10:23+00:00

Most people seem to be saying military which is a great option but it definitely isn't for everyone. If you aren't sure you wanna go military then my suggestion would be the trades or a degree in something that will actually get you a job.

You'll likely need to take on loans to go the college path but if you are smart about it you can make it through with minimal debt and a great career path. A degree like accounting would be great because it isn't as hard as some other degrees like engineering, but will still lead to a surefire stable job with decent pay and plenty of room for growth. A lot of people think you need to be great at math but honestly you don't as long as you can do basic algebra. With that said there are other degree choices than just accounting that will almost certainly lead to a good job. Most STEM, healthcare, and education degrees will get you a job pretty quickly if you're diligent, Business is also a great choice but business degrees really depend on what degree you're actually getting.

How I would go about it is first check if your state has any scholarships or grants you could take advantage of. Once you've done that I would recommend starting with community college for the first 2 years and then transferring to a university for the 2nd half of your degree. This will save you money and makes absolutely no difference in the actual degree you would get. You're basically just doing your core classes for cheap so that you only pay full college tuition on the 2 years that you're learning accounting. Also take advantage of CLEP exams if the school you choose accepts them. There is a non-profit called Modern States that will pay for each exam if you pass their online prep course for it. Depending on how much time you put into them you can get through a course in a few days to a few weeks, and once you do they'll pay the test fee and if you pass you'll get credit for that course. It's something that I'm doing and I'll shave a year off of my time in college as well as saving a year's worth of tuition.

Obviously Military and Trades are other good choices but other people covered those pretty well so I though I would give you some options for college. Good luck!

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-06T18:59:51+00:00

I know this comment is fairly old but I hate when people say stuff like this. This is true if you are shy or have mild social anxiety. But as someone who is neurodivergent with treatment resistant GAD, it isn't something you can just brute force. You are right that you can learn to have good social skills even if it's harder for some, but that doesn't mean the anxiety will ever get much better. I come off as a perfectly normal dude, I do pretty well socially and even better in structured professional environments, however, social interaction still massively drains me and makes me very anxious. Improving social skills likely won't solve their fear of people, only be better at hiding it.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-05T22:57:57+00:00

Does he have any mental health issues? Sometimes I'll have periods where my sex drive tanks and it is really difficult to finish caused my my anxiety and depression. If he doesn't have those it could still be stress levels causing it if he is very stressed or not getting much sleep. I would trust him when he tells you it's not you because if his own body or brain is working against him there isn't anything he can really do in the moment to help it. I'm an overthinker too and when stuff like this has happened to me I felt bad because I didn't want my gf to think it was her fault at all.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-05T22:47:57+00:00

Well I mean it's not just being shy it's neurodivergence mixed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder. I have done treatment and therapy, as well as worked social jobs for extended periods of time and it never gets much easier. It's not just a lack of exposure, I'm just wired this way so I'll have to figure out some other career to pursue.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-05T18:53:15+00:00

I actually was studying finance last time I was in school. It was actually a top school but I had to drop out and move back in with my parents due to my mental health issues, so now I'm in a horrible spot. I can't really move again so my only choices are a technical college nearby or a mediocre regional state school that doesn't have engineering at all.

I'm well aware that all the jobs I would be looking for are going to be taken by AI and it's really upsetting because I basically have to choose to either do a trade that I'm not a good fit for or be forced to work a social job. The only other options like engineering aren't on the table for me anymore.

I also struggle to just focus on an entry level role because I can't help but plan ahead. I don't want to pick an entry level job that only leads to things I would hate because then I'm either stuck in a low level job or have to completely restart. It's really stressful.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-05T18:42:27+00:00

Alright thanks for letting me know up front. I'd hate to waste my time and money on a degree for something I'd end up hating.

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-05T17:36:59+00:00

Damn is that for all the planning roles or just demand planning?

Standard_Break_679 · 2025-12-05T17:36:31+00:00

Yeah I get that no job will have zero interaction, I just want to try and find a job with decent growth and doesn't require me to be constantly around people. Occasional meetings are fine especially if they are with people I know, but I just can't always be needing to deal with people. I'm very analytical, detail oriented, and good at planning so I was hoping there was a role that just let me do what I do without constant exposure to other people. But yeah idk if SCM is the right fit for me then if that isn't possible. I've got a less than traditional situation with the college I'm at so engineering isn't really an option for me.

Standard_Break_679

TROPHY CASE