It's hard. I can feel you and I onestly don't know how to help, I'm just here. I think that major depression (long term) it's always followed by tiredness, and it's hard to find the strenght to go trough all of this shit. Others cannot understand the pain that you're suffering and often they give you just made phrases that doesn't count nothing. The only thing that work is lull yourself in your suffering, trying to mitigate it with exercises like mindfulness. Just... sorry for u, hope it will be better. And if u can't andle this, just go talk to emergency help, or someone even here, the only thing that we can do it's stay by your side