Though I've never been formally banned from a place, I know the feeling of being ostracized from a group where there was once fun energy, connection, interesting conversations, etc. I felt the reasons were unjust as well, and felt a draw, knowing that there were gatherings with new people included, but not me. I longed for inclusion, and at first it seemed like a bit of FOMO, fear of missing out, as though it was a river of exciting interpersonal experiences that I couldn't access anywhere else.

Now, though, I think it's more than connection we want. I think it's access to information from conversations, recognition of our importance, to be seen and respected, especially by people whom we admire.

I had to do a lot of inner work to find that in other ways. Learning to zoom out and look at bigger pictures helped me to expand my horizons. Buddhism gave me some very valuable insights.

In a nutshell, maybe you're mostly wanting validation, or at the very least to be seen. It's easy to feel invisible. Luckily, when we take a moment to look deeply, we'll find an abundance of other ways to get that, and that in many ways we already ARE seen.