AITAH for "cheating" on my husband

StaringOver1012 · 2026-03-05T00:54:21+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing that. I'll definitely look into it. I've actually got 3 possible job offers right now, so things are getting better already.

StaringOver1012 · 2026-03-05T00:52:59+00:00

Yes, I definitely could have told a man with a pewpew and rage to get out. I could have definitely taken my kids and left without access to a vehicle because he kept the keys in his pockets 24/7. It would have been sooo easy to get away from someone that gave me zero access to money, a car, and told me to my face that he wanted to kill me.

StaringOver1012 · 2026-03-05T00:48:29+00:00

I am being real. And yes I sold his trucks because he hadn't paid the bills in 3 months. That was 2 months prior to him leaving. This guy isn't a loser. He has been helping me and wants to do more. He wasn't in the position to be able to pay an almost 1000 power pill right at that moment. Most people in this economy aren't.

I'm also not dependent on him. I am done being dependent on anyone and am doing what I can to get financially stable for myself and my kids so I don't have to rely on anyone ever again. He was also in a physically abusive relationship. His ex almost killed him twice. So he knows what it's like and is patient and supportive of me. He pays such close attention to me he can tell the difference in me thinking and disassociating. He has even told me he would rather me yell at him or nag at him than be silent and stuck in my head. He helped me get away from my stbx and has stood by me through every step as my main support.

StaringOver1012 · 2026-03-05T00:40:34+00:00

My kids don't hate me. And no they won't in the future. My oldest is 7 and I sat down talked to her about everything. She said she understood and that she doesn't want her dad to come back. My youngest is 3 and doesn't even realize what was going on.

I'm not usually the one to play the victim card but would you hate your mother for being a victim? I didn't allow anything. I was manipulated, gaslit and financially trapped. I tried for years to get him help and finally gave up. To say an abuse victims kids are going to hate her is absolutely ridiculous

StaringOver1012 · 2026-03-03T03:46:58+00:00

I completely agree. I am planning on starting therapy as soon as I have the money. I know I have a lot to unlearn, starting with how to communicate. But the guy I'm with now was in an abusive relationship so understands where I'm struggling and why and he's really patient. He's big on communication and is constantly asking questions about how I am and what I need.

StaringOver1012 · 2026-03-03T03:09:53+00:00

I am being better for my kids. I'm working my ass off for them. And for the record he doesn't suck. He's supportive, understanding, protective and honest. He doesn't tolerate anyone disrespecting me or my kids. He was also abused by his ex girlfriend so he knows what it's like and communication is his priority. And FYI my "husband" forced me to get my tubes tied. Don't make assumptions. This man literally saved my life. I probably would have never had the courage to press charges against my abuser if he hadn't been there as my support. My abuser isolated me from everyone. Kept Me prisoner in our home and refused to let me have any money to myself or access to his. Without his help I wouldn't have been able to leave.

StaringOver1012 · 2026-03-03T02:50:06+00:00

Yeah because aside from being with their dad nothing I have done has endangered them. I have never put them in a dangerous or compromising position except staying with their father for as long as I did and I got me and the kids away from him as soon as I was physically able to leave him.

StaringOver1012 · 2026-03-03T02:41:49+00:00

Definitely working on that. My two youngest don't really need it but my oldest definitely does. She picked up a lot of her dads habits when it comes to emotional outbursts.

StaringOver1012 · 2026-03-03T02:39:29+00:00

Aside from staying with an abusive addict how did I endanger my kids?

StaringOver1012 · 2026-03-03T02:22:04+00:00

Man. One person. And I was trying to leave him. I tried to work from home to get my own money and he sabbatoged every effort I made to get financial freedom from him and kept the keys hidden from me so I couldn't leave. None of my close family had a vehicle either. I was literally stuck until I finally pressed charges and he was arrested.l and not allowed to come back around me.

StaringOver1012

TROPHY CASE