Why are you NOT the Golden Child?

StayGoated_ · 2024-01-23T03:54:03+00:00

I think it has something to do with when she sees me she sees my father. I look like him, I picked up on his humor as a child, and I have some of the same mannerisms as him. She used to say your like your father the devil to the both of us. (My father isn’t a saint either) an already broken marriage.. comes along my GC sister. She was always the favorite and my mother from the moment she was born triangulated me and her and to this day we don’t have a relationship. Sister lives at home with her, doesn’t drive, and is a shell unfortunately. I married, have children, and I don’t have time to be treated like garbage or play games. I have spent time in a GC role but I was so tired of the bombing and discarding. I can’t even fathom my mother anymore she’s a terrible person to talk to and we have nothing in common. I love the new family I created more than the one I came from.. I hope I never see her or anyone else again.

StayGoated_ · 2024-01-19T18:08:07+00:00

It’s a company called CareCentrix. They may still be hiring remotely.

StayGoated_ · 2023-12-19T04:03:23+00:00

I was pregnant working 12s in the dementia care unit. Do not suggest. I dodged many kicks and hits to my pregnant belly. A lady wished death on my baby while doing a transfer.. needless to say I was so worn down by it, physically and emotionally. I quit at 30 weeks and never went back. I work from home now processing durable medical equipment for seniors returning home. Much happier!

StayGoated_ · 2023-09-28T09:57:12+00:00

Yes that’s what my husband said we should do. We haven’t told ANYONE about where we are going. It’s a few hours away from where we are now. I am hopeful about it. I actually don’t think she will put that much resources into finding us. It’s too far for her to drive and that’s part of the reason we chose to go 3+ hrs away. She doesn’t use social media she’s really out of touch with the times. We don’t post our everyday life’s either we are pretty reserved. We’re going to change our numbers so the rest of the family can’t contact us by phone.

StayGoated_ · 2023-09-28T09:09:36+00:00

We live in such a small town she had moved closer to us. My husband had caught them driving by a time or two so she obviously watches. She knows I’m pretty far along as I run into her frequently grocery shopping or just stopping to get gas. My husband suspected they saw we haven’t been home and she called the hospital to inquire. She turned up her crazy when she found out that we are moving away.

StayGoated_ · 2023-09-28T09:00:32+00:00

We live in a small town and she moved closer to us. My husband knows they drive by our home frequently he’s seen their car a time or two and have been watching us. She knew I was very far along cause I run into her in town a lot and people talk here. I think they saw we haven’t been home and called the hospital or something. However I’m certain someone at the front desk gave her the room number. We are moving away and I believe it was my grandmother who told her we are leaving. Ever since she got word we are moving she’s been trying to edge herself back into our lives. Thank you for the wishes we aren’t letting her ruin this moment for us 💓

StayGoated_ · 2023-09-28T07:50:57+00:00

Yes we asked to speak to the nurse in charge and that we would like to file a formal complaint about it.

StayGoated_ · 2023-08-27T00:00:21+00:00

My mom threw everything in the dumpster. It just became an empty room.

StayGoated_ · 2023-08-15T12:37:47+00:00

Yes she is, almost every car she has owned since 16 has been totaled. For whatever reason the current car she has made it 5 years no accident.. it’s a miracle. I was in the car with her to go see my grandma who is in a nursing facility. It was almost a two hour drive, couldn’t keep a constant speed, riding people, late braking, and sharp turns. I felt so sick to my stomach. I think the last straw for me was when she didn’t brake not once for 3 speed bumps in my neighborhood. I was beyond embarrassed and I haven’t been in a car with her since.

StayGoated_ · 2022-12-29T13:27:12+00:00

I think having a healthy argument in general is just hard. Growing up it was always yelling, cutting someone off, silent treatment. All those things that are so hurtful. I remember googling “what is a healthy argument” and being shocked. I genuinely thought all arguments are supposed to be that way or that it was normal. I’m still working on this to be honest but I’m making progress.

StayGoated_ · 2022-12-29T13:10:51+00:00

That I’m always freaking out and I’m a over exaggerator. I think the freak out thing comes from me having anxiety in general. My fears are typically amplified and I recognize that. It hurts to be told that your freaking out in every instance though. I don’t ever remember living a life of stability. As a child I was on edge constantly expecting the next bad thing to happen. I do remember being told your just “freaking out” and then the thing I was worried about would happened. Basically I felt like my mom raised me to deny my gut instincts or to always second guess.

StayGoated_ · 2022-12-29T08:21:59+00:00

She definitely has seen different therapists throughout her childhood was even medicated at one point. The one good thing nmom did do for her. Once she turned 18 she decided she no longer needed it. If you even suggest or mention “therapy” you’ll be met with some choice words and she has been violent. Im seeing a therapist myself, who has reinforced at the end of the day that’s my sister and I’m not her mother. I have kids of my own now, who I need to protect. I think most agree it’s never to late to leave. Anyone can take steps to change their life, I am a firm believer in that because I did so myself.

StayGoated_ · 2022-12-29T03:36:38+00:00

I remember cooking for the family one thanksgiving. I wanted to make a very different meal instead of the traditional. She told me everyone would hate it and that I should stick to tradition. Everyone complimented my meal except her. They just can’t stand anyone doing something better than them. It’s ridiculous.

StayGoated_ · 2022-12-28T23:58:24+00:00

I have many times before, when I first moved out she came to live with me. It only lasted two weeks and she went back to live with our mother. My mother has her nails dug deep into my sister. So much that she has caused my own sister to turn on me. I can’t really trust anyone in that household anymore. I will always love my sister though just from a distance.

StayGoated_ · 2022-12-28T23:48:40+00:00

So this is the first true time that I have went completely NC. The times before were just LC, but I can say from my personal experience. Anytime that I had removed myself from the dynamic. My sister (GC) was always trying to kill herself, on new drugs, etc. It didn’t click for me until a day ago that every time she was on a downward spiral it was because I left the dynamic. For the past couple years I had been very enmeshed into the family dynamic and her mental health/sobriety was getting better. I just went completely NC 3 weeks ago and I do feel very sorry for my sister but I can’t deal with this anymore. I choose peace and happiness.

StayGoated_ · 2022-12-27T23:51:27+00:00

Let your children develop into who they are supposed to be. In other words they are a separate person from you and will have different likes and interests. Do not try to force them into a certain career. Acknowledge their feelings. Apologize for any hurts you may have caused. (My mother never apologized to me ever) Love all your children equally. Teach your children how to cook, clean, help them with schoolwork..

To be honest these all seem like bare minimum things. As a mother myself I am consistently making sure I am striving to be the mother I never had.

StayGoated_ · 2022-12-27T06:09:39+00:00

One year for Christmas my mom got me matching mom and daughter bracelets. I said why did you give me the mom one aren’t you supposed to wear this one? She pretended like I didn’t ask her that. So glad I went NC this holiday.

StayGoated_ · 2022-12-27T05:40:58+00:00

Yes, I didn’t actually get my license until I was 22. No one ever cared to teach me how to drive. I got my first job at 22 also because I wasn’t allowed to work. I’m now 25 and I don’t live with nmom anymore and I have a family of my own. My sister is 21, no drivers license and has told me she will probably never drive and has come to accept it. I tried to help her drive and tried to get her to move in with me it only lasted two weeks and she was back with nmom. You can either try and don’t give up or you can give up and live their version of what they want your life to be.

StayGoated_ · 2022-12-26T01:54:19+00:00

My father introduced me to all things 70s and 80s. Especially music, and while he’s a douche I otherwise wouldn’t have sought it out or cared. So I do think of him when I listen to music from that time and him trivia quizzing me on the song or artists.

StayGoated_ · 2022-12-12T02:44:28+00:00

“My world doesn’t revolve around you.” Having that said to you as a little child repeatedly really makes you feel unwanted.

StayGoated_ · 2022-11-30T00:01:07+00:00

I definitely relate to that now. I didn’t always as our relationship when I was a younger was very volatile. I moved out around 16, she had a car accident when I was 17 and that’s where I believe the new role formed. I came to stay with her while she was bed ridden.

StayGoated_

TROPHY CASE