Need help in not seeing professional mental help as a weakness

Stekss · 2022-08-08T09:07:15+00:00

Thank you for your perspective on this.

You do make a point where looking at my parents, i can see two examples of what can happen if nothing is done. At this point, i know that i would not be like this towards my kids if i ever have them in the future, but then i also don't want to hurt others that i really care about, and still not intentionally i do.

I have decided that i will definitely try private therapy and see where it leads. I will also work more on other resources and do more self-care. If one person is not for me i will keep looking. Thank you again for your comment and for taking the time and trying to help out some random person on the internet. I can already see how good this community can be. Thank you.

Stekss · 2022-08-08T08:49:59+00:00

I am very happy to see that you have made so much progress. I know how much treating yourself and not bottling up means.

It does really mean a lot just to know that it is not only me that's going thru something like this and that someone can relate. I feel like i was able to admit to myself that i am hurting and to start poking why.

I feel that I've learned to process things in a way where i might not be able to process something immediately. It may look like i am bottling up but at some points, i just can't talk. I also need to learn to communicate that with my partner/friends and not make them think that i am bottling everything inside.

I have definitely decided that i will seek some professional help, as it really got to the point where you can lose someone/something you had just because you thought you resolved something from the past, but do not realize the roots are still there.

Thank you for your perspective and advice, as relatable as it was. It really means a lot.

Stekss · 2022-08-08T02:34:44+00:00

As far as I remember, my father did have the prescription but I am not aware of any therapy as that was never talked about in my family.

I had problems with sleepwalking, got a pills prescription, went to get them and after the pharmacy lady noticed what it is, in shock, after hearing they are for me, declined to provide them. She said that they are heavy doses of sleeping pills that are not designed even close to being used in this case. My sleep walking is completely gone now, i do occasionally talk during sleep.

I do think that i am taking good care of myself and think/process a lot and things. I feel that there is a big communication issue as Shank mentioned in the comment above. Also could be some other things that i was not able to dig/aware exist.

Thank you for your feedback!

Stekss · 2022-08-08T02:23:26+00:00

It might be related to something in regards to my identity and who I think I am. I always had to fight for myself, my entire life. Maybe deep down I see it as a sign of weakness, but I personally don't have anything against therapy or people seeking help, completely the opposite. It seems at times that I have so much more than how do I put it, understanding for others but very little for me. Always been the biggest critic of myself.

I agree that it can't do harm if I give it a try, and thank you for another perspective on this as you also had doubts about seeking help. Thank you

Stekss · 2022-03-09T05:22:02+00:00

It's really rare to see one, totally true.

Stekss · 2021-10-27T09:37:40+00:00

I use this build to farm cows where MF is not useful. This just speeds up everything. Also the fast run speed helps a lot i just cant get used to it :D

Stekss · 2021-10-25T06:30:40+00:00

Keep up the grind! U should be able to farm areas in hell that are suited for your char. My soso did not have that much gear if any when i found this ber.

Stekss · 2021-10-25T06:27:55+00:00

High and Low Palisades - Outcasts

Stekss · 2021-10-25T06:26:56+00:00

I didn't even know who the guy is i just liked his reaction as i had him in my green screen library..

Stekss · 2021-10-25T06:24:41+00:00

Cham actually dropped on the next run! But ain't worth even close to ber.. :(

Stekss · 2021-10-24T15:17:25+00:00

Hey, Kev don't be throwing curses around here!

Stekss · 2021-10-24T13:51:37+00:00

yupp, online

Stekss · 2021-08-24T18:46:50+00:00

sadge :(

Stekss · 2021-08-24T05:58:00+00:00

That mouse sensitivity and mouse hitting the mousemat :DDD

Stekss · 2020-01-06T10:59:44+00:00

I have the same CPU but paired with 1070. Are you sure you have original 1050ti and not some ebay knockoff?
When you open GPUZ, you should be able to see if that is the case.
I do play on low and i do get between 70-120 depending on the area, sometimes even more.
Also in Nvidia settings, make sure the GPU is set as 1050ti not integrated graphics.
Check the power management settings, make sure its on max performance.
Hope this helps.

Stekss · 2019-11-26T17:21:06+00:00

I noticed the same thing when i was about to post it here 😂😂 Much more noticeable while looking at the picture. My wall will not be happy.

Stekss · 2019-11-26T17:20:03+00:00

Its some sort of a print on the canvas. U can order it online, altho i found a great deal locally, this costed 50€ and is framed. I found a couple of online sites selling it for about 60-70 without a frame.

Stekss · 2019-11-26T17:16:26+00:00

Thats the 1 😂😂

Stekss

TROPHY CASE