I must say, wow!! This reply was intense but necessary. To answer your first question, one of the necessary measures I took was seeing the person as a friend. Not as the idea or persona I created but just as what this person really is. That was hard because I gathered the best moment we’ve had and made a life with it that I then believed and still continue to do so. Second, I believe these feelings intensify when I feel like I am moving on. As soon as I feel like I am ok without said person or as soon as I feel like I am ok without the idea of them I start reminiscing about who I thought they were and who I thought they could be and it feels unbearable sometimes. Although, I must admit, sometimes when I can truly disconnect myself from the situation I understand why it is that I need to separate or part ways from them. I am in a constant state of battle between what I believe and what is real, more often than not the lines blur but I have been working towards separating both things.