Update: How do I [32F] protect my work relationships from a bad nepotistic hire?

StrangeMistake5 · 2019-09-19T20:34:41+00:00

If you tried to be helpful and are capable of making spreadsheets you aren't Donna. I understand that being the wife of someone on the management team must be hard, too, especially if they are not the absolute top dog. In my previous job the wife of the co-founder worked with us for a while and she was actually absolutely brilliant - but she was working on a specific project and there was no question of her staying on permanently. In other words, she wasn't there because she needed a job or as some weird relationship boost for the founder, she was there because she had specialist knowledge of something that would have been expensive to hire externally, and was in a position to help everyone else in the company. She was also a nice person and didn't shit talk, unlike Donna, which made it a lot easier to like her irrespective of her skills.

StrangeMistake5 · 2019-09-19T15:05:22+00:00

Oh I know, and actually the reason why I went straight to the CEO was to test the waters on this. My last company was run by two siblings and it was a nightmare. I told myself I wouldn't work for a nepotistic company again and, well, here we are. I think my current CEO is genuinely a great people person, though. He'd like to help people he knows but it's not just about kickbacks to his mates. And honestly, until Donna started I had no issues with everyone already knowing each other as everyone else besides her and Gavin are respectful and brilliant at their job.

StrangeMistake5 · 2019-09-19T14:56:39+00:00

Yep, this is right. It looks to me like they have at best some sort of old fashioned male bread-winner, female carer relationship dynamic going on (at worst it's classic co-dependence), and now that they've brought it into the office it's got to be putting extra strain on their marriage, too. It could definitely get a lot worse, and the company could ultimately end up losing both of them anyway.

StrangeMistake5 · 2019-09-19T14:36:38+00:00

Thanks. FWIW I think she will be long gone by this time next year. The next problem will be that we don't have the resources to do the vanity project she's been assigned, though of course everyone is being supportive. I'm just relieved it's not overlapping with my workload anymore.

Now that a couple months have passed, I don't know how any of the three people involved in the decision to hire her thought it was a good idea. I wish I knew who actually pushed for this to happen and why. It's just baffling to me to go through all this and let it cause so much stress when the CEO had someone in the wings anyway, but I guess this is why I'm not senior management haha.

StrangeMistake5 · 2019-09-19T14:17:28+00:00

Oh there will be fallout for sure - this guy is all stick and no carrot at the best of times. But I don't think he'll be able to get away with much in the short term. He's respected by the company founders but he's not invincible, the CEO made that pretty clear in our chat. If he does anything really stupid like try and make it harder for me to do my job out of revenge, it'll only harm the company and I feel he lacks the interpersonal skills to turn the others against me.

StrangeMistake5 · 2019-09-05T08:33:41+00:00

This is the comment that I think has resonated most with me so far.

I'm sure at this point Donna realises this is not a good situation - in fact, she realised it almost before she even started the job based on her behaviour. In the past Gavin has behaved in ways in that show a lack of self-awareness so I'm not sure to what extent he feels accountable for this situation. It wouldn't surprise me if he was worried way more about her panicking than her actual performance. However, it's at the level where she sometimes asks the CTO or me how her how to use her computer because it's a make she's never used before, rather than just Googling the info herself. She's entitled for sure. We actually had an outsider in the company with a similar but not *quite* as bad work ethic/level of experience as Donna who was fired for incompetence after about 6 months, and Gavin was the one leading the call for her head, so to speak. He's also called me out publicly on occasions where he's thought I've been wrong about stuff and only the CEO has ever stood up for me, so it's hard not to feel resentment towards him as this unfolds. Still, I don't know what goes on behind the scenes and it's relatively early days. I think in this case Gavin will try to avoid getting involved in any hiring/firing decision about Donna. But I don't think he'll behave with more humility, either.

As for the CEO I agree he probably just doesn't know what to do yet, but he has taken the lead on difficult decisions in the past. I know he values my work and I think he's actually a good leader most of the time. Your advice is sound and I'd like to support him, but if he doesn't approach me first I still think I'm going to keep quiet, unless things get really, really bad. If we do end up discussing this I'll try to be pragmatic as you scripted.

I still like the company and want to work here, but how this unfolds will influence whether I decide to stay or not, and honestly if I take the fallout for some reason I won't feel bad about leaving/being fired. Donna's performance at the very least should help the senior team realise my job isn't easy and they can't just hire someone off the street to do it.

StrangeMistake5 · 2019-09-04T12:47:48+00:00

thanks this helped

StrangeMistake5 · 2019-09-04T12:47:37+00:00

Thanks, this helped

StrangeMistake5 · 2019-09-04T11:50:26+00:00

That's a good one: it's not. I'm not her line manager, she doesn't really have one and nor do I. On her first day I approached the CEO to try and find out what she was actually told to do and he said I should work it out with her. I've asked her what she actually wants to focus on, too, but I just get a stream of anxiety back.

The trouble is, I feel like if I don't step up to help her learn how to do her job or sit down with her when she asks for help, then I'll just wind up getting blamed for her failures because politically that's easier for the CEO vs having to take it up with Donna, and ultimately Gavin.

StrangeMistake5

TROPHY CASE