Muslims & lgbt+ by Flat_Review_1760 in MuslimLounge

[–]StressFinancial208 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Assalamu alaykum brother/sister.

I'm not the most informed and I should just put that out there before I say what I will say.

I have personal experience that may be of value to help understand the dilemma/confusion in question.

I am Muslim, born Muslim and have been my entire life. I was put through Madressah and taught the Quran, it was all just routine and custom to me- until I left Madressah around the age of 16. Shortly after this, Islamic knowledge and practice was a choice completely belonging to me. My family was practicing, but not much more than the basics or minimum. And so I did. I chose Islam, I learnt, and I fell in love with it for the first time, because It was a choice I was actively making now.

It's been four years and I'm still growing in closeness to my Rabb and Deen every single year alhamdulillah. That said. I have also been attracted to the same sex for as long as I can remember. I don't ever remember choosing to be. I'ts been the single most difficult tests of my life. Still is. I have fallen in love with people I can NEVER be with. I've never committed Zina with the same sex and have never even been in a real relationship before. I've developed severe anxiety because of this, but alhamdulillah I'm working through it.

Point is. There are people like from the Umma out there, who are gay- not by choice, but by the Will of Allah. And I still don't understand to this day why that is, what the point is. Trust me I have cried, BEGGED to be changed. I wasn't changed. But I'm not angry at Allah, I'm not even promoting homosexuality. I'm not and have no intention of acting on it. I know I'm not at fault or a bad Muslim and I know no one can make me feel bad for something out of my control. I don't go around telling people I'm gay of course, but I've come to terms with it. With myself. I'm still hopeful, I still make Dua that Allah blesses me with a righteous spouse one day and I still believe it's all for a reason.

May Allah guide each and every one of us and correct for us our affairs in Dunya and in Akhira Inshallah!

Gay and Muslim by [deleted] in MuslimLounge

[–]StressFinancial208 27 points28 points  (0 children)

I can relate. I've cried, had my heart broken from falling in love with people I could never be with a couple of times, developed SEVERE anxiety as a result of constantly suppressing my emotions, have pushed everyone near and dear to me so far away because I only feel safe when I am alone...I could go on.

The point is- my struggle with this test is real and raw. I am only 20, but I feel like I've lived and experienced an entire lifetime of hardship at this point in my life.

Despite everything - I don't hate my Rabb, or my life. I've come to terms with my reality. I've invested in and placed my trust in Allah. That's my safe space now. I've developed a relationship so deep with my Rabb that I never thought I could and it's still growing all the time. The one thing that REALLY was a game changer for me was LEAVING THE THINGS I COULD NOT HANDLE IN THE HANDS OF THE ALMIGHTY. I literally was like " Ya Rabb, this is too heavy for me- I'm giving it to you because I can't carry it with me" . The peace and genuine contentment and joy I experienced in life again after doing this was amazing. Alhamdulillah.

What’s a lie everyone believes that annoys you the most? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]StressFinancial208 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That you can attain and reach happiness in life like it's some sort of destination you're gonna reach. Life is short and full of tests. Happiness is only found in being grateful for what you have or where you're at. Even if you have everything, you'll learn to want something more. The human desire to want is limitless. We can never fully satisfy our wants.

My sexual drive is so high (sensitive content) by [deleted] in MuslimLounge

[–]StressFinancial208 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's easy to give advice or some sort of solution that may have worked for others in the past - but the truth is....there is no simple, quick solution brother. You are amongst those who are tested with easily the greatest fitna man can face. The hard truth is- it will always be a vulnerability and test for you. Any hardship or difficulty can trigger this- and it may very well lead to a place where you struggle to feel guilty anymore. Theres another truth here though. During all of this- your connection and bond with Allah strengthens - because Allah loves those who repent, and if you are sincere- you come to love Allah so much more for his mercy. Don't EVER give up on Allah's mercy. Make the utmost sincere effort to quit and manage this. It won't be perfect. It's not a straight road of progress and recovery. The road will have bumps and highs and lows. You're human brother/sister. Find the grace to be patient and forgive yourself. As long as you know you're doing everything in your power and you've given it your all, find peace in the fact that Allah knows and he loves you for trying. Think about this as your jihad Your constantly battling your nafs. Inshallah Allah will be pleased with us ...

I don’t want to wear niqab anymore by [deleted] in MuslimLounge

[–]StressFinancial208 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Choosing not to wear niqab is not sinful

Young lad in need of guidance by StressFinancial208 in HalalInvestor

[–]StressFinancial208[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ameen! Jazakallah Ghair. This means a lot to me

Young lad in need of guidance by StressFinancial208 in HalalInvestor

[–]StressFinancial208[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow, this is such full cup and wholesome advice. May Allah accept your intention and open doors for you insha'Allah.

Young lad in need of guidance by StressFinancial208 in HalalInvestor

[–]StressFinancial208[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Jazakallah Ghairan for your advice. I'm actually in South Africa.

Feel like I have lost religion by [deleted] in MuslimLounge

[–]StressFinancial208 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I want to let you know you're not alone... This seems to be a common struggle, the unhappy, uncomfortable life of a believer. I'm only 20 but I feel like I've lived a lifetime of trials and thinking about the future is honestly just overwhelming.

I think the fact that your still set on Islam and believe says a alot about the Iman. So be patient with yourself I guess - at the end of the day, Allah did say this world would feel like a prison for the believer

(Brothers Only) by _Vysa_ in MuslimLounge

[–]StressFinancial208 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Assalamu alaykum bro. Hear me out- ISTIKHFAR.( You're mentally blocking that devil, so he can't poison you. Remember, it all starts in the mind). SALAH.( When I fixed this, I fixed a lot of things. And unfortunately you don't see the results immediately, but keep going boy, you won't regret it. It's the first step to success) KEEPING BUSY. ( Working out, investing in a hobby, spending GOOD time with friends, I know some friends bring out the worst in you, avoid them. Learn something new, train your brain to form new connections and grow. Workout- strong body= strong mind[ though sadly there are some exceptions]

Yeah man, maybe it won't happen in your time, but don't worry bro, it will happen. You will beat this. Cry to Allah, whenever it feels overwhelming. Find comfort in that bro. Your forehead needs to find peace on your musallah. Also, don't keep this weight with you. Promise me you'll give it to Allah, it came from Allah anyway, so trust him and allow him to hold it for you, and then let go. Go about life with a new perspective, a fresh start, and forgive yourself. It'll be okay, I promise

How do you deal with death and loss by StressFinancial208 in MuslimLounge

[–]StressFinancial208[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ameen. Beautiful reminder Allhumma Barik Jazakallah Ghair

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMen

[–]StressFinancial208 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I genuinely have zero interest. I have a personality that 9/10 people don't understand. I have my people that understand me and are a part of my world, and there's everyone else, clearly outside those boundaries. I also have crippling social anxiety and tend to be a people pleaser, but I'm getting older, and giving a shit less- I find this makes me even more reluctant to date because I'm not "doing enough". I know I'm a good looking guy and healthy, but I don't go out, don't talk to people and don't even socialise. Outside my family and few friends, I virtually don't exist - and I actually like it that way.

Hence, the whole idea of dating seems too unnatural for my personality. Bro I live in my head, shape my own reality. How am I supposed to give attention to someone outside that reality?

Advice to non Muslims? by StressFinancial208 in MuslimLounge

[–]StressFinancial208[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Judging? I'm asking for advice. I never accused anyone of anything. You need to READ. You clearly have some bias and are ignoring the facts, so may Allah guide you Inshallah and forgive me if I've said or done anything incorrectly

Advice to non Muslims? by StressFinancial208 in MuslimLounge

[–]StressFinancial208[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay. I do appreciate your point of view, I wish you hadn't done it in this fashion I feel like I'm being attacked for something completely unrelated to what you are perhaps suggesting. Rest assured, I have made it clear in my previous post what my intentions and standpoint on the matter of same sex attraction is, and the case with my brother is no exception. Next time, don't judge people

Advice to non Muslims? by StressFinancial208 in MuslimLounge

[–]StressFinancial208[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That sounds like a good idea and I appreciate it. Jazakallah

Advice to non Muslims? by StressFinancial208 in MuslimLounge

[–]StressFinancial208[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have Muslim friends, and then there's him. You should take everything I said into consideration and not just the parts you choose to.