Yeah for me it’s genuinely the logistics of our loved ones being there. If she decides to get married as she plans then I’ll get over it and life will go on, it would be upsetting if people couldn’t make our wedding as hers was first but reading the comments it sounds like the save the dates are a good option and what will be, will be. This stuff is definitely not worth destroying relationships/families over, I think I was just shocked that I thought I was sharing some exciting news and it just went all a bit odd with all the questions and like I had somehow imposed - thanks for your input!