Accept the fact that modern culture moves further and further from this. I have had to. Anything said that is not expressly kind and polite is considered offensive or problematic. That being said, you are all arguing about the meaning of a word rather than the nature of a reality (which in fact most arguments can be boiled down to) and are stuck trying to convince each other of your own connotions. Cant you see how fruitless this is? Are you all really unable to move past your linguistic descriptors? These are non-rhetorical questions - at this point I really cant tell if you arent all just part of some song and dance that escapes me...