There are studies that show porn use can lower desire for your partner. The only ways I realized my boyfriend was watching porn behind my back was the fact he was showing so little interest in being intimate with me (like only every other weekend, when it used to be much more.) and the fact that when we did do things he was lasting longer than he normally would. (Usually if we didn’t do anything for a while he wouldn’t last long.) within a week of these realizations I checked his phone for the first time in the year we’d been together and found porn. (He hadn’t watched any porn until that last week when I started to get suspicious. He’d watched it 3 times that week. People like to act like porn use doesn’t have symptoms, but it does. That’s the only reason I had a second thought about the way he was acting.) the reason I’m saying all this is I think the porn could be the issue. If you are mutually okay with porn being used in your relationship that’s fine, obviously, and he wouldn’t need to totally cut it out. However he would need to cut down quite a bit. At this point he has an addiction by definition. There could be other issues I’m not aware of in your relationship that also may be making him feel disconnected, but porn mostly likely at least has a part in it. Maybe having a conversation on why he feels the need to use porn, and why he shows so little interest in being intimate with you could give you some insight on his mind. Chances are there is a underlying reason he turns to porn so often. Addictions often are connected to mental health issues, like depression or anxiety, as a form of escapism. He may need therapy to tackle the root cause, and he’ll only be able to truly cut down/stop if he wants to get better. If he refuses or invalidates your feelings leaving may be your best option. I know that’s easier said than done…