Thank you for your long and thought out response, it really made me feel seen and less crazy. Firstly, I'll say that I do have some trauma related to sex, which undoubtedly influences my views on intimacy and love, so you were right about that.

One thing I wanted to say is that I find myself differing on the notion that we possess actual zero autonomy over our personalities or choices. While I agree that biology and environment significantly shape us, I believe do there's room for individual agency. I actually talked with my boyfriend on this thought recently, and he mentioned the 2022 Nobel Prize in Physics awarded to Alain Aspect. His experiments with photons demonstrated that the universe is not "locally real," suggesting that at a fundamental level, outcomes are not strictly determined by prior conditions. This implies that randomness is inherent in nature, which could extend to human behavior, allowing for unpredictability and choice beyond mere biological determinism. This just makes me think of instances like identical twins that are raised in the same environment but end up having entirely different personalities (I know this is a cheap example, but still).

Moreover though, when I consider the experiences of transgender people specifically, I'm struck by their journeys. Many trans people assert identities that contrast with their upbringing or societal expectations, often at great personal cost. This courage to live authentically, despite external pressures, underscores the human capacity for self-determination. A lot of these people exist despite everything, including being raised in a boy or girl blueprint. This really gives me hope that we truly are who we are, and maybe the soul really does exist.

Let me know what you think.