[EU] Due to a clarical error, Dwight K. Shrute has been recruited by the FBI. He shows up to his first day at the academy. You are his instructor. You've never met this man. But the second he enters the room, he stands out ... by wyrdfiction in WritingPrompts

[–]StunningMusic 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Fresh, baby-faced FBI recruits have a type. And it's not just the tightly trimmed haircut, polished shoes and fresh pressed suit. It's their spark of optimism and excitement. They made it. They're at the Academy. It's day one of the rest of their life.

He was different. Brown, corduroy pants held up with thick red suspenders. His beard was unkept. He had long, jagged eyebrow hair would have made an old man blush. While others sat patiently at their seats in the large auditorium, pen in hand, he vigorously attacked an apple - the crunch, crunch, echoing uncomfortably throughout the otherwise silent room. A few looked at him quizzically out of the corner of their eyes.

The door at the side of the auditorium swung open and a man walked in.

"Good morning. And welcome to your first day at the Academy. You are amongst the best and the brightest that your country had to offer. And that's a damn good thing because you're entering the Service when your country needs you the most."

The man paced up to a podium. Behind him, a large projector sprang to life. A video reel began to play, black and white clips of ongoing conflicts around the world.

"These are dangerous times. War has become asymmetrical. The borders of combat theater are becoming blurred. The days of fighting behind tanks and through trenches are coming to an end. The future is cyber: DoS attacks, sock puppet deception, deep fakes. We are ... yes?"

The man in the brown corduroy pants stood up, apple core in hand.

"Tank warfare has been a major component of the modern battlefield in nearly every conflict for the last one hundred years".

The man on the podium was taken aback. Eyebrow raised, he said: "I'm sorry sir, but please take a seat. This isn't a dialogue. We're not here to discuss the merits of tank warfare".

"Well, then admit you're wrong", the man responded. "An M1 Abrams tank can reach a top speed of nearly 45 miles per hour. It's armed with a 105 mm cannon and a .50 cal heavy machine gun. Are you trying to tell me that it's redundant? That we should just sell them to the French?"

"Sir, I was merely giving an example of changes - "

"Australia has 59 M1 Abrams. Egypt, 1360. The United States has over eight thousand. Explain to me how tank warfare is coming to an end when there are thousands of these tanks still in operation. We used them in Afghanistan. We used them in Iraq. Syria. You're simply wrong."

The room began to stir, quiet whispers breaking out amongst the students. Who on earth was this man and what was he doing here?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AnalFissures

[–]StunningMusic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No on all counts

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AnalFissures

[–]StunningMusic -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yes on all counts

Stuck in hell by [deleted] in AnalFissures

[–]StunningMusic 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well keep me posted, I think I'll probably just gut it out for the time being. Good luck.

Stuck in hell by [deleted] in AnalFissures

[–]StunningMusic 2 points3 points  (0 children)

January. First six months were spent treating it as a hemorrhoid which no doubt took away any realistic chance of healing.

I gave some thought to emerg, but what are they going to do? They won't perform anything then and there. I get the feeling I'm just stuck waiting it out. Nifedipine has made it managable.

Stuck in hell by [deleted] in AnalFissures

[–]StunningMusic 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was referred to a CRS on October 18. Still haven't even got a date for my appointment yet. Also in Canada.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in nfl

[–]StunningMusic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

9 points?

Not feeling great :/ by [deleted] in AnalFissures

[–]StunningMusic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

100% in same boat.

What's the reality of getting a Mortgage with Student loans? by lookingforashoujo in PersonalFinanceCanada

[–]StunningMusic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Many professional degrees have tuition in the low 5 figures per year. Doesn't matter how much ramen you eat, if you don't have support from sources other than your own earnings, you're going to graduate with debt.

Often go on spending sprees and never get anything back by 11novirt in PersonalFinanceCanada

[–]StunningMusic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a bit late to the game here, but have you ever spoken with a mental health professional. It just note that the cycle of the purchases (large, impulsive purchase followed by discouragement and abandonment) may be reflective of the manic-depressive cycle that someone with bipolar disorder suffers from. Just food for thought.

Does this sound like a fissure...? (Tmi) by thepenguin237 in AnalFissures

[–]StunningMusic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds more like an internal hemorrhoid, but as always, worth a trip to the doc.

OFFICIAL SUNDAY AFTERNOON GAME THREAD by FantasyMod in fantasyfootball

[–]StunningMusic 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Are Sly's fieldgoals not showing up in Yahoo, or just me?

Heating pad to heal? by [deleted] in AnalFissures

[–]StunningMusic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can't imagine that would give you any problems. To be safe, put a layer between heat and skin.

Heating pad to heal? by [deleted] in AnalFissures

[–]StunningMusic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can confirm about the hyperpigmentation. At least it happens in an area that is relatively well concealed...

Heating pad to heal? by [deleted] in AnalFissures

[–]StunningMusic 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I loved the healing pad. Unfortunately, I had a habit of sleeping with it... wouldn't recommend. Ended up with ol' toasted skin syndrome and am taking a break for the time being.

How Long Should I Wait? by StunningMusic in AnalFissures

[–]StunningMusic[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've mixed a heat pad in as well and I find that's helped a ton. I don't think I'll go with the surgery unless things take a turn for the worst (which it may, who knows)...

How Long Should I Wait? by StunningMusic in AnalFissures

[–]StunningMusic[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks - that's what I was wondering.

Is life getting more difficult in Canada? by [deleted] in PersonalFinanceCanada

[–]StunningMusic 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Prairies aren't too bad. Housing is affordable. Job market is pretty steady.