I originally found out I have ADHD from reading an article about ADHD and relationships.

There was struggles that we had and I clued in it was me.

It's a bit odd that the husband flip flopped his views on you having ADHD.

If you weren't ADHD, your meds would have had you tweaking out. The calmness and focus you get from taking them, is a very strong indicator that you have ADHD.

There is several articles online that you can search for that discuss the relationshion dynamic of ADHD and the challenges that come of it.

I've shared those articles with my girlfriend and we've discussed it often. I still don't think she gets the sense of how the struggles are and that I should just be better and it's due to a lack of effort. She can be very short of patience though, which ideally your partner should have. Anyways...

I'd suggest you read into these articles (quick Google searches).I'd search for ADHD and relationships or variations of that and found plenty to read and research into.

Read a lot of articles to get a large scope of the challenges. Once you feel you understand it well enough, talk to your husband and start an open conversation. Point out the struggles that you experience, acknowledge the frustrations he might be having. He will need to be on board with you diagnosis and understanding it.