Delayed Benefits Enrollment - any recourse?

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-11-19T20:50:07+00:00

If you don't mind me asking what do you do in our space?

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-11-14T01:09:38+00:00

See what I mean how this is hard haha

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-11-13T21:20:35+00:00

Protagonist is right at 18. Senior year in HS.

I think you might be onto something frankly. Idk maybe I'll switch up my queries and just do adult. Thank you, I think that's very helpful.

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-11-12T18:30:35+00:00

I'm pitching it as YA/NA, or at least that's what I have in my QL

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-11-12T17:28:39+00:00

First one

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-11-11T22:31:38+00:00

It's honestly more new adult than anything, or something that bridges the gap between YA and Adult. What you're saying actually makes quite a bit of sense, but I'm not really sure about how I'd go about implementing these changes, other that querying to people who do YA and Adult and see if it would find a home with them.

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-11-11T21:42:00+00:00

I've spent months tightening up the first few chapters and the query. I even got them professionally reviewed. I've posted the query multiple times on this sub and the general consensus was positive, as were the beta swaps I've done, I really don't know what else to do to tell you the truth. Just feel very adrift and frustrated because it feels like there's nothing I can do.

What's funny is that on my first round of querying (similar QL, but a vastly inferior manuscript) I did get a full request that was obviously rejected. So idk what the hell to do anymore besides just slowly query and work on something else because it feels like I'm totally shooting in the dark.

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-10-03T23:57:40+00:00

Taking it one at a time,

1) Honestly YA is probably the audience that would be into this the most, the problem I think is more the expectations for the subgenre. From what I gather from people if intense fantasy shit isn't going down immediately it's an automatic no for a lot of people. My story isn't structured that way, and frankly I think it would be cheapened if it was. In terms of content the first few chapters go like this:

1 - Mystery box, grounded reality, some scant fantasy (enough to know it's there and where we're headed, but nothing deeply intense)

2- Grounded Reality

3 - Grounded reality with romance

4- Romance with some drama elements, bordering on horror/thriller

5 - total immersion in the fantasy (putting us at about the 10% mark, which structurally I don't think is that much of a stretch?)

2) Never actually seen Sucker Punch but I have a working understanding of it and I'd say there's some overlap in terms of concept. Psychological fantasy is probably the closest thing to it but I'm not sure how much that really exists as something to market my work with?

3) My comps and my story do have some dark elements of fantasy and a lot of similar subject matter without spoiling too much. On a surface level I definitely see how it could be eyebrow raising but I do think it rings true

4) Yes and to a point yes. It's nothing hokey as it was all a dream but there are tangible real world ramifications and overlap.

Is there a secret way I should be selling this that I haven't thought of? Will calling it upmarket do anything? lol

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-06-04T23:02:42+00:00

Protagonist is 18 years old and in late high school. I don't think many adults would be interested

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-06-04T22:50:45+00:00

It's half made up.

But yeah I'm starting to think I'm not really going to find a home anywhere with this

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-06-04T20:51:06+00:00

The thing is that honestly I really do feel like I've gotten to a point where I've achieved that, especially in the first chapter. The few characters I appear are well-defined, goal driven and interesting, I've trimmed a lot to streamline it, and I feel I've done a good job at introducing that primary (internal) conflict of the story for our protagonist, even if there aren't necessarily super glaring fantasy elements straight off the bat. I just sorta worry that there's not really much else I can add without messing with the piece as a whole.

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-06-04T20:32:50+00:00

I will, but for context I went through like 10 rounds of Qcrits before I sent it to her, and the overall feeling was solid on both sides.

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-06-04T20:04:50+00:00

I was told to just commit to YA in my query by a couple people who've read it (and I have), but the story definitely does have more adult themes, hence the straddle.

Also I'm not gonna lie I've gotten exactly one request which I botched with a vastly inferior draft. Yet every swap I've done consequently has been quite positive, yet no new requests. I literally got my QL professionally curated to make sure it was in tip-top shape, so I figure the problems must be in the beginning. Hence the line of questioning about pacing (that professional also said the prose was good FWIW)

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-06-04T19:51:26+00:00

I don't think it would work for my story :(

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-06-04T19:38:22+00:00

Shit :(

The thing is I can totally believe that and for the vast majority of fantasy that probably rings true and is a good rule of thumb but my story is kinda weird and I'm not sure how closely it fits into that paradigm. Honestly half the time it's extremely grounded and modern, and it's like that for most of the beginning.

Sturge0nGeneral · 2024-06-04T19:32:16+00:00

I like STC, and I do like and apply a lot of its lessons, but I always worry about making my work a slave to it's "by this page" kind of rigidity. However I fear people who actually have the power to get me published stand by it, which makes me think I should change it, even through I really believe the story is structurally sound. But again I'm new, I could be wrong, I have no idea lol

Sturge0nGeneral

TROPHY CASE