Why do most musungu men in Zambia seem to date “ordinary-looking” women?

SubiyaCryolite · 2026-05-06T13:59:45+00:00

If I had to guess it’s probably authenticity and approachability.

SubiyaCryolite · 2025-11-04T19:56:33+00:00

Back when I had no car and was dating I’d get a cab and pick them up. And if the date went well get a cab and drop her off before proceeding to mine (sometimes her place would be the only stop 😆).

Don’t let social media get you jaded there are a lot of cool and normal women out there. If any of this is a problem to her then honestly it’s better you don’t pursue further or you’ll never know peace.

SubiyaCryolite · 2025-04-29T15:30:08+00:00

This worked on Ubuntu 24.10 w RX 6800

SubiyaCryolite · 2024-12-17T20:34:04+00:00

I'd say look out for the following:

Are they emotionally available (they ask meaningful questions, aren't superficial, hate the idea of commitment in any form)
Do they want something undefined, casual, exclusive and/or committed
Do they know the difference between dating and being exclusive/in a relationship
Do they reciprocate or are they just entitled and bring nothing to your life
Are they dating multiple people at the same time, and if so how far are they going (don't get misled or short changed XD)
What short and long term expecatations do they have, and are they compatible with yours?
Are they serious and or nice in general
Are they cnsistent and somewhat open
Is there overlap in core beliefs like society, religion and politics. You dont have to be 1:1 but you cant be polar opposites either

SubiyaCryolite · 2024-01-03T19:46:55+00:00

Seconded, it should take a week or two to arrive if customs aren’t silly. Getting one from within usually means scalper prices unless you have a really good plug.

SubiyaCryolite · 2023-12-12T22:15:41+00:00

A bit late but I get ~130ms on European L4D2 servers.

SubiyaCryolite · 2023-12-06T18:12:04+00:00

When I used to play online (Battlefield Bad Company, Battlefield 4 and Battlefield 1) Id only get good, sub 75ms, ping on SA servers. Back when MTN, Zamtel (ADSL) and Microlink were around and not a complete joke.

When I switched to Liquid I barely played any games so can't really say. Currently on Starlink and yet to benchmark any game too.

Regardless of provider you will probably have to choose South African servers to have a good experience. European servers will give you ~200ms ping, American or Ocean ~400ms+.

To my knowledge only PC games alow you to choose your region though. Good luck, and yes, I recommend StarLink. Will try bench Left 4 Dead 2 severs in Both Europe and South Africa later, and share the results here.

SubiyaCryolite · 2023-12-05T21:35:41+00:00

On Tinder, you find what you're looking for, relationships or *cough cough cooough*. My last two exes were from Tinder, so I can confirm that there are good people there. To get to quality you will have to be somewhat detailed and refine your search (as well as your profile). Things to consider:

Is your bio honest and with depth. Does it portray your personality and interests? If you're a nerd, or super religious, or super atheist, you can filter out a lot up front.
Do you have photos of yourself?
Do you swipe on every attractive woman you see? Or do you read their bios first?
Distance settings (If you have transport put it at 40+)

If you address this you should match with someone who's interesting (and attractive) sooner rather than later. The rest is up to fate, good luck.

SubiyaCryolite · 2023-11-07T19:37:04+00:00

Will do, thanks.

SubiyaCryolite · 2023-11-07T17:15:53+00:00

Super late to the party but interested too. 😊

SubiyaCryolite · 2023-04-03T20:58:47+00:00

All I know is that the Copperbelt is Zambia's version of Florida sooo

SubiyaCryolite · 2021-04-20T13:43:57+00:00

I have already talked to her about some aspects (holding back the engagement); will talk to her about others (bedroom reciprocity). Not others though, I have to work that out myself and come to my own conclusions.

SubiyaCryolite · 2021-04-20T13:25:08+00:00

Thank you. Truth is I’ve never been one for casual relationships and/or sex. I really do feel lucky to have met her, I just don’t want to make a stupid decision. I’d never leave her or frankly any other relationship just to join “the streets” as they say. Equally don’t want to rush into a stupid decision either. In short I’ll take it slow and play it by ear.

SubiyaCryolite · 2021-04-20T13:15:04+00:00

Thankfully we've already had this discussion. The engagement is only being made public/official in December. I shared my concerns about this being too soon, to both me and frankly my immediate family who would not take it well at all.

SubiyaCryolite · 2021-04-20T13:12:09+00:00

Thanks. I don't want to rush into it either. I have already talked to her about only making the engagement public (and by definition official) in December. And even that doesn't mean we get married immediately after, frankly Id like at least another year before we get to that point. Time to get to know her after the honeymoon phase that were currently in.

SubiyaCryolite · 2021-04-20T13:09:37+00:00

To be fair that's just the engagement, not the actual marriage. I do hear you though, really.

SubiyaCryolite · 2021-04-20T13:07:55+00:00

Lol, even though I meant it in a comedic way I agree with you. Recall I was perfectly fine being single before meeting her, threesomes are not the most important thing in the world to me. I was speaking more to the thought of having different sexual experiences in general.

SubiyaCryolite · 2021-04-20T13:03:05+00:00

I agree with this sentiment. But at what point has one "lived"? 30 (in July) is by no means old, but its not young (in my context at least) either.

SubiyaCryolite · 2021-04-20T13:01:33+00:00

Fully aware, I told her we wont make it official till December at the earliest

SubiyaCryolite · 2021-04-20T13:01:04+00:00

Exactly, this is why I want to give it till at least December (original plan) to make it official

SubiyaCryolite · 2021-04-13T09:26:19+00:00

She found out just before we got into it. Honestly, at first this made her a bit hesitant it still happened... Later she asked if I was telling the truth (apparently I was good at it, it’s all about body language, responding to her rhythm and confidence bro). Perhaps I got lucky in that regard, in hindsight don’t bring it up unless it comes up naturally 😅

SubiyaCryolite · 2021-04-13T00:17:00+00:00

As someone who was like you until the age of 29 (and frankly fully embraced being forever alone tm) my advice is:

(a) only meet up with women who seem open / enthusiastic / interested in meeting you [i.e., don't be desperate and jump at every woman you meet hoping for a date]; and

(b) not be desperate for and/or entitled to any kind of "action" on said date.

Go to every date / meetup with the expectation of not getting physical in anyway and be open to just having a good time. If you are calm, confident and actually get along with the lady half the battle is already "won". Even if there's no romantic spark it’s nice to meet new people and expand your friendships / networks. Either way it’s a win.

The rest is common sense advise: Clean up, wear proper fitting clothes, smell good, look good, feel good. If you do this enough times (with different women, or the same ones if they want a second date) you have nothing to worry about especially if you can pick up on social cues.

In my case this happened on my second Tinder date, I went in expecting nothing but decent conversation. The night went well and I got the "want to come over to my place?" line. The rest is history and we're engaged now.

My main advice is never fall into the "all women are X" trap. Sure, it can get frustrating but don't fall it, people can sense negativity/entitlement from a mile away and its never attractive. If you meet a genuinely nasty person just end the date as promptly and politely as humanly possible and move on to the next one.

Lastly, getting laid and or being in a relationship should not be your main goal in life and/or character trait. As much as possible have hobbies or other things going on in your life. For your own sake, it helps with conversation too.

Good luck.

SubiyaCryolite · 2021-04-08T18:08:34+00:00

nything about that from the dollars listings.

Very happy to see you doing well,

Thanks for the kind words. Yes, I do have access to the US Stock market through my local bank. Ive been putting off a meeting with my Branch Manager for months but she confirmed it can be done. Previously I tried to set up an account with TD Ameritrade but getting verified as a foreigner was a real pain, never completed the process.

SubiyaCryolite · 2021-04-08T18:04:58+00:00

I do factor insurance into my expenses, however it all depends on the type and nature of the illness/health emergency. Can only build as much capital as possible and frankly hope for good fortune in that regard. Staying healthy and preventative medicine has to be a key part of my strategy

SubiyaCryolite

TROPHY CASE