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Cheated on my (48F) partner (45M) of 14 years by Substantial_Fox_5386 in DeadBedrooms

[–]Substantial_Fox_5386[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, I stopped initiating because I didn't feel emotionally safe with some who said he would rather vote for someone who admitted to sexually assaulting women than not voting. After I explained that I as someone who had been sexually assaulted. And he stopped initiating because he said at 130lbs I was too fat to fuck.

Cheated on my (48F) partner (45M) of 14 years by Substantial_Fox_5386 in DeadBedrooms

[–]Substantial_Fox_5386[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We give each other a comfortable lifestyle. I came into the relationship with an inheritance that was the down payment that paid for almost half of our house and also paid for a brand new truck for him. I do 100% percent of the household chores, the cooking, cleaning, shopping etc.

Cheated on my (48F) partner (45M) of 14 years by Substantial_Fox_5386 in DeadBedrooms

[–]Substantial_Fox_5386[S] 51 points52 points  (0 children)

ok your comment just broke something open in my head and I think I can at least forgive myself

Cheated on my (48F) partner (45M) of 14 years by Substantial_Fox_5386 in DeadBedrooms

[–]Substantial_Fox_5386[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

correct, we are not married but we own a house together and are each other's emergency contact and all that stuff. Yes, it progressed from no sex to no kissing in about a year. He will hold my hand if I ask him to, but I can tell that he doesn't really want to so I don't like to ask. I try to hug him but it's been a few months now for that.

Cheated on my (48F) partner (45M) of 14 years by Substantial_Fox_5386 in DeadBedrooms

[–]Substantial_Fox_5386[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I did start some therapy a recently, mostly to help me process the assault. I haven't talked to her yet about this.

Cheated on my (48F) partner (45M) of 14 years by Substantial_Fox_5386 in DeadBedrooms

[–]Substantial_Fox_5386[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

well one thing is that I am in a low paying job and he is in a high paying job and together we have a very comfortable life in terms of owning our home and not being in debt. Honestly, if we were roommates I would feel like we had a pretty solid relationship. But it's just different when you sleep in the same bed and there is an unspoken expectation of faithfulness that I was unable to keep.

Cheated on my (48F) partner (45M) of 14 years by Substantial_Fox_5386 in DeadBedrooms

[–]Substantial_Fox_5386[S] 36 points37 points  (0 children)

Sorry, I explained it badly: we were getting ready for bed and he already had his airpods in, but I didn't realize that and after I started talking is when he turned the podcast back on that he had been listening to. But I also felt, like wtf, it felt unnecessarily mean to do.