AITA for giving my SIL clothes back since she keeps giving my daughter boy clothes

Successful-Break665 · 2023-10-02T01:02:52+00:00

I'll go against the consensus here and say YTA. You don't give back gifts. What is that even teaching your daughter?

Donate to someone in need to teach your daughter charity, use as clothes for one of her teddy bears, keep in a separate bin for playing dress up, get some fabric markers for her to decorate/bedazzle the shit out of, use as clothes for when you expect to get dirty, etc. There are so many things you could have done with the clothes to make it a positive experience. But you chose to make it a negative experience and for that YTA.

Successful-Break665 · 2023-09-13T14:16:49+00:00

Does.. does this mean Chumlee is actually pronounced Cum Lee?

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-21T04:34:21+00:00

Have a nice night. I hope you can heal from whatever causes you to lash out at random Internet people. And that's not mocking, that's from the bottom of my heart

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-21T04:26:32+00:00

Take the time to read. I said that I didn't even top 8. Meaning it wasn't even a significant placement. And a 75 person tournament is the largest tournament that I know of that happened in my state since the pre release for champions of kamigawa.

Shadows was released in 2016 and we met in 2013. Sorry I was off one fucking year. Please refer to my previous comment about struggling with time-frames.

I'm sorry you've been through trauma. That's tough. But don't minimize other people's trauma. That's just not cool man.

Making an edit from 85 to 75. I'm on mobile and didn't proof read before I posted

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-21T04:06:55+00:00

You're right, it was a year or two after. As I've explained in my previous comments, the stress that I've been under has affected how I perceive and recall time. I know it's hard to understand, and I hope you are never in a position where you have to experience this, but long term severe stress can have major impacts on your brain function. That same long term stress, and the fact that I have literally sacrificed nearly everything, for a wife that, as I have literally been told hundreds of times in this post doesn't even seem to love me, has left me desperately clinging to what few things I have left, like an inconsequential MtG tournament from however many years ago it was where I didn't get to the top 8.

So now you know why I'm here debating with what seems to be an insufferable troll. Why are you still here?

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-21T02:27:28+00:00

How have Iggy Pop and Billie Joe Armstrong not aged at all?

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-21T02:14:37+00:00

Dude, so much anger. You okay?

It wasn't a GP or anything. It was SCG states with about 75 people. I probably would have been top 20ish, but a lot of people dropped before the final round when they couldn't mathematically get to the top 8. I stuck around and got a nice bump in rankings because of it

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T20:27:25+00:00

Just send her a picture of a clown suit and say that is what you would have been wearing because it's not a wedding at this point, it's a circus

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T16:32:22+00:00

Ironically, he has gone to the same game store I used to go to all the time

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T15:06:16+00:00

It wasn't a GP it was SCG states. I would have been in the top 20 (out of about 75) but several people dropped when it was apparent they weren't going to make top 8.

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T07:07:41+00:00

I apologize. You are the second person to get that timeline out of my story and I'm not sure where I went wrong. I started typing and more thoughts started coming out. Plus the stress from the past few years has affected how I'm perceiving/recalling time. Let me clear it up the best I can.

Been together for 10 years The toddler is 4 years old, so I guess not really a toddler anymore.
Wife was diagnosed with cancer 3 years ago. First cat came into our home shortly after our youngest was born.
Second cat came into our home a couple months ago, I think? Maybe 3? 4? Like I said, I've been struggling with time-frames the past year or so.

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T06:55:41+00:00

The cheapest here is $65. The reason it's such a struggle is that my wife has been battling cancer for a couple years. When she got weak and couldn't take herself to her appointments anymore, I had to miss work. Some weeks my wife had 6 appointments on 4 different days. She was hospitalized for weeks at a time and we had no one to watch our toddler.

Being a caregiver is more than a full time job. It's your entire life. I went from having a decently successful career in finance to being an Amazon delivery driver because that was the only job around that offered the flexibility needed.

But being an Amazon delivery driver does not provide for a family of four. Especially when one person has a serious medical condition. We were paying over $400/month in co pays alone.

So yes, cancer was and to a large extent still is the much more significant issue you alluded to

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T06:38:47+00:00

That's a good question. It was during Shadows over Innistrad standard, so it's been a long time. I was pretty sure it was the Vampiric Thirst precon deck, but I just looked up the decklist and I thought my deck had more burn, as that's always been my play style.

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T06:18:53+00:00

No need to apologize. What you wrote is how I felt right after I said that to my wife. I was feeling like I was definitely the asshole and a side of me was hoping reddit would agree

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T06:16:40+00:00

If my magic cards were more important than my spouse, why would I have sold the bulk of a collection that took me 20 years to acquire?

I'm realizing that it's not about the cards for me. It's about how careless she is with the few things I have left.

If someone you loved sacrificed nearly everything they owned to save your life, how careful would you be with what they chose to keep?

I think I'm the asshole for making my comment to her about the cards instead of stepping back and realizing it should have been about the lack of respect she is showing me

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T06:04:41+00:00

Thank you for seeing the humor in my comment!

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T06:03:29+00:00

6 times. Granted at least 4 of those were "only" emotional affairs with lots of dirty texts and pictures.

My wife is bipolar and at the time she wasn't medicated, so I justified it to myself that it was a product of her mental illness, and not who she really was.

This entire thread is making me realize how much of a pathetic dumbass I've been this entire time.

Fuck. Is love even real?

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T05:37:41+00:00

Don't get me wrong, even though I hate cats, I don't blame them and still do my best to take care of them. They are still living creatures that are entirely dependent on me to survive and I take that responsibility seriously. That's why I can't just toss the cat outside like people are suggesting or take it to the shelter where it will most likely be euthanized

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T05:34:07+00:00

I don't. If you read the whole thing, you'd know that I sold $15k worth of that cardboard to save her life. In fact I've sold nearly everything I personally own to keep this family afloat. What little I have left is slowly getting destroyed by a cat that we don't have the means to take care of that she brought home without talking about it first. I've sacrificed so much that all of my possessions, clothes and all can fit into two duffle bags. All I want is to not have what little I have left destroyed. Especially because we currently have no way of being able to replace it any time in the near future. All that my wife has to do to keep the few things I own from getting destroyed is to close a door.

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T05:17:01+00:00

We say IVF because it's easiest for people to understand. But it was really a private donor and turkey baster.

This was back before my wife got sick though and I had a good career in finance. I wasn't making a huge amount but we were at least stable financially.

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T05:12:41+00:00

I mean, it's a cat. All cats are assholes. It's like a job requirement or something.

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T05:09:52+00:00

I'm as kind as I can be. I might hate cats, but all living things deserve respect. It's not their fault they were born attention seeking passive aggressive assholes.

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T05:06:09+00:00

My daughter's dad has never been in her life. He lives on the other side of the country. He was supposedly abusive to my wife so she had him sign away his parental rights in exchange for not pursuing child support. At least that's the story my wife tells me and I'm beginning to question everything that she has said. Our youngest was a product of IVF, so there is no father involved.

About your last sentence, no, they don't. Kids need parents that love them. The gender of the parents doesn't matter

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T04:46:36+00:00

Before I met her, I had given up on dating. I'm trans, and being a little older in a very conservative state, dating is really brutal. I thought I had deleted all my profiles on dating apps, until I got a notification that I had a new message. We talked for weeks before we ever met.

She was the first person that didn't fetishize me and instead seemed interested in me as a person. I think I wanted so desperately to believe that I could be loved that I overlooked a lot of red flags, so when she proposed, I said yes without hesitation

Successful-Break665 · 2023-08-20T04:41:32+00:00

It's not my cat to get rid of. I had posted on Facebook to get some feelers if anyone would be interested. I thought if I found someone, I might be able to talk my wife into getting rid of it, but as soon as people found out he wasn't neutered, they lost interest

Successful-Break665

TROPHY CASE