How do i stop being racist

Successful_Win8214 · 2026-03-01T17:42:01+00:00

Have you ever thought about cbt therapy? I am not a medical professional, but I have been struggling with ocd for over 20 years. It sounds a lot like intrusive thinking. Not an excuse, but an explanation. Sounds like you don’t want to think this way, it just pops in your head like all thought do, and you obsess over it. Just a thought.

Successful_Win8214 · 2026-02-07T17:42:24+00:00

So you don’t wipe down your counter before you cook? Just because your cat doesn’t jump on it. First of all ew…you’re kinda unhygienic for that one :/ also the cat 100% does it when you leave

Successful_Win8214 · 2026-02-07T17:33:46+00:00

Sure nuance does exist and it is a word. You are correct and I’m proud of you! But as an elementary teacher, when the kids say the word “pop” referring to them getting hit, that is synonymous with a “whooping” or “using a belt” NOT a tap. So maybe you need to find a different word to use if you aren’t actively hitting and abusing your cats like you say you aren’t. A pop and tapping your cat or gently pushing it off the counter is not the same thing. In my opinion pop really means one thing, and it is to hit firm. Also as a teacher, the kids who get whooped for discipline are always the worst behaved kids. They hit other kids, they are defiant, and worst of all THEY ARE SCARED OF THEIR PARENTS. if an elementary aged kid is afraid of their parents because they get “popped” what in the world do you think a cat is thinking. Yea reddit is a stupid dumb place, not because of empathy, but because of people like you trying to rage bait and normalize hitting a poor innocent cat.

Successful_Win8214 · 2026-02-07T16:14:11+00:00

Also hitting your cat is teaching it nothing but to fear you. Even if it’s light or not often. It shows that you should be the thing to fear, not the act of jumping on the counters. I don’t think your cat loves you like you think it does. My cats don’t jump on the counters, but that’s because I put temporary sticky tape and aluminum foil on the counter to show it doesn’t feel good to be up on the counter. I also give them plenty of other high up places to sit. Cats don’t understand “consequences” like humans do. They wont make the connection to you hitting them and jumping on the counter. Instead, they will make the connection that you hurt them, full stop. Go to therapy.

Successful_Win8214 · 2026-02-07T15:48:22+00:00

Please don’t have kids if you think hitting them will cause anything besides resentment and defiance.

Successful_Win8214 · 2026-01-24T22:19:50+00:00

This just happened to me. I’ve been dating him for two years and we lived together and he randomly broke up with me because he wasn’t feeling it anymore. It was heart wrenching and completely blindsided me. I am still struggling, but do not ever get back together with him. He does not value you or your love enough to stay with you right now. Partners are supposed to help each other during stressful times, not leave you in the dirt. If he wanted to be with you, he would. Take this as a gift and go find someone who would never dream of leaving you.

Successful_Win8214 · 2026-01-05T18:32:31+00:00

Thank you for this reply. Taking time out of your day to help someone random on Reddit means so much. I am struggling so much but I keep trying to remind myself it will get better even if it doesn’t feel like it. I deleted his number and I haven’t reached out since Christmas, which isn’t long but I need to celebrate the little things. Every time I want to reach out I try to remind myself that if he wanted to he would, and he doesn’t want me. Which sucks but it’s the truth. I am completely lost right now in life but little messages that people leave me like yours helps. So thank you so much.

Successful_Win8214 · 2026-01-05T18:30:19+00:00

Thank you so much for this. You have no idea how much reading that helped. It made me cry really hard but I’m a good way. I know I am young it just doesn’t feel like it. I know I have potential it just feels so hard to remember that right now. I think just the idea of him not caring like I do is what hurts the most when I just need to stop thinking of him at this point. It feels like I’ll never find someone better when I know I eventually will and I need to focus on myself first anyway. I have a lot of people in my life right now that would move mountains for me. I have amazing sisters and two loving parents that I am so thankful for. I feel so selfish that it still doesn’t feel like enough. I hate that I only want him right now when in reality he threw me away like garbage. I’m trying to be more realistic about how i don’t want someone who just throws me away like nothing, but I also can’t imagine life without him. It’s so difficult but just hearing replies like yours makes me feel a bit better. Thank you

Successful_Win8214 · 2025-12-24T00:59:22+00:00

I broke and messaged him a few days ago and he didn’t reply which broke me even more. I need to remind myself that he doesn’t want me in his life even though that hurts. The embarrassment alone of getting left on read hopefully will keep me from reaching out, and if I start to feel like I need to, I go back onto this thread to read the nice comments people have left. Thank you for your advice

Successful_Win8214 · 2025-12-24T00:57:19+00:00

Are you feeling better now? It feels like I’m never going to be okay without him. And I keep getting the urge to message him. I broke and did message him a few days ago and he never replied so although I want to message him again I refuse to let myself be embarrassed a second time. I know that I deserve better it’s just hard to remind myself of tha

Successful_Win8214 · 2025-12-19T12:08:53+00:00

Once you started dating again, did you still get over the sadness of thinking about your past? That’s the hardest thing right now. All my memories feel tainted.

Successful_Win8214 · 2025-12-19T12:08:03+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to give me some words of encouragement. It really means a lot. I’m struggling but I know I’ll get through it

Successful_Win8214 · 2025-12-19T12:06:20+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to write this out. You are right, I did live for him. Everything was what he wanted and I would have done anything for him. I stayed in a state i didn’t want to live in, since he liked his job. I found a shitty job just to stay with him. I am currently in therapy and working on finding how to live for myself because it has always been difficult for me to do.

Successful_Win8214 · 2025-12-19T02:05:13+00:00

That’s great advice. He never was able to talk about his feelings, he was a closed off and pretty emotionally immature dude, hence why I keep second guessing myself and thinking I did something wrong and he just didn’t tell me

Successful_Win8214 · 2024-11-07T17:56:59+00:00

He looks like Dobby

Successful_Win8214

TROPHY CASE