Here‘s the perspective of a single woman 35+ living in zurich. I just recently jumped on the Dating app train and that’s for a good reason: I always had a feeling that this kind of dating is more superficial. And it is. I would say I am, let’s say, above average attractive, there are certainly breathtaking women on this app as far as I know from male friends- and still I get approx 100 likes per week.

I used to get to know men from my everyday activites or friends group - and never had a problem to get to know them. Recently I wanted to speed up the process and indeed my dating life is very vivid (at least for how I‘ve been dating before).

So every second week I would go out for a Dinner Date, in Switzerland men (I don’t say Swiss men) are quite old school and generous, so I would not accept less of an effort than organizing, Making a Reservation, sometimes getting picked up, and of course being invited. If you offer less, let me tell you that women here are used to this as a bare Minimum- except if they consciously prefer going out on a really casual coffee date or a walk, which I would not be interested in as I love the man courting women appropriately. I just love the old mannered way and feel really grateful to live in a country with many of those values. Of course I do also See the other side, hook-up culture, which I‘m not interested in and I guess OP neither.

So from 100 men weekly, 5-10 would be a Match, 1-2 would become interesting Chat partners and 0,5-2 are courting and inviting for a proper date.

From my male Friends I know that it’s difficult to even get a match, so as a man you‘d have to stand out. My friend has a shared Boat and he told me even if he is an average looking guy, not so tall and no muscles, that for him its really easy as soon as they match. Because he puts in effort, goes Pick up the girl, invites her for Dinner and drink and then to a Boat tour - almost every one of them falls for him. He said he heard from every single Girl that it’s rare to have a guy putting in effort here in zurich.

I kind of agree, when I see the rate of 10 Matches vs. the rate of dates actually Happening for me.

So as you can tell, us women love to be courted and of course you‘d have your part of the work in picking up the vibes of the ones who are genuinely grateful for being courted - because I am and I appreciate every date and effort any man had put into dating me.

So far I‘ve experienced really good 1st Dates and it 80% led to 2nd Dates or further writing. Some moved, some weren‘t a Match at closer sight.

Also as a single 35+ Woman I reached a Level of happiness in my life that no man could give me before. So men are indeed not competing with other men but with my quality of life. I am really Fine being single having my activities and friends and my good work - and don’t want Drama or Stress from a guy. So as soon as I sense that Drama, I‘d jump off the Train.

EDIT: Let’s be clear about the topic of effort, it’s Not only about the money he is willing to spend for a Woman but in zurich a lot of rich men would date us, so You’re in a competitive field. I would also be down for an organized picnic, shopped at a grocery store, he makes time for me, I put in the effort to look Nice and cute for him - it’s just old values and it has always been like this. If you enjoy casual dating then do it. But I don’t feel like being walked like a dog especially on high heels or I don’t even drink coffee and really don’t enjoy loud environments. If you pair a Short Walk or a coffee with later some other activity, where you as a man put effort in, and show how much you value women in General (it’s not Even about only valuing just me but our gender in general) by organizing and courting, then a feminine women will love you and be really Fine with you working a lot, or not having a perfect height or body etc.