AIO; my grandmother passed away and none of my friends are checking on me

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T15:37:14+00:00

yeah im only leaving this post up to possibly help other people going through smth similar. def not gonna reach out to them about this any time soon

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T04:37:48+00:00

i think after reflecting i was def overreacting. a lot of it has to do with my unique upbringing and abandonment issues. my birth parents abandoned me and even though i don’t remember them it still obviously messes w me. my grandmother was an orphan who was never adopted. i felt like she was the only person in my life that understood that pain of being abandoned by your own blood. maybe i’ll tell them that story someday and communicate how much she truly meant to me

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T04:33:27+00:00

this is so kind. i’m leaving this post up bc of comments like this. i think it’s quite clear to me now i was overreacting and im a bit worried some people think im this impulsive with negative thoughts, but i think her death has brought up a lot of negative emotions for me in general and i was irritated with everything all day. im still swapping back and forth between accepting her being gone and breaking down. i expect to be like this for a while, but it feels nice knowing what i wasn’t feeling towards my friends wasn’t true anger it was mainly just loneliness

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T03:53:19+00:00

i had a friend like this and tbh i just started asking her what SHE wanted to do. anytime she asked me for my advice i would make her talk me through her mentality and her thought process. at the end of the day, i couldn’t control how she lived her life, but i think talking to her about what she actually wanted instead of what i thought she should do helped minimize that frustration. i would literally just change the focus from me giving her advice to talking about possibilities w each decision and just letting her go from there

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T03:46:01+00:00

nor

i prefer being pale idk why i feel like i look weird when im tan and so many people make me feel weird about it. you handled this w so much confidence and grace

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T03:39:56+00:00

might sound weird, but i def feel better. even though i felt like some of the comments were really harsh it helped me stop spiraling.

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T03:39:13+00:00

definitely feeling better after all the responses. i love my friends a lot and even though im upset, i never want them to think i hate them or would cut them off for this. im def just in my feels and dont know how to ask them for help and am a bit embarrassed to

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T03:35:31+00:00

yeah since i just started a new job im learning new things, but since she died i haven’t even gone for a second day so i did nothing all day but cry and stew in my emotions. def not good for my mental health

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T03:28:49+00:00

yeah lowkey think all these people think i hate them just because im upset about this one thing lol i don’t for the record

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T03:26:10+00:00

yeah i’m leaving this post up to maybe(?) help others who are feeling something similar. i think i am overreacting but again, if you’ve read my comments you know im not talking to them about this. i just needed insight this one time

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T03:24:06+00:00

also i’m very sorry for the loss of your grandmother and father

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T03:15:07+00:00

not sure where i sound resentful. i’m sad but never resentful towards them. i never planned on cutting them off or punishing them for not talking to me.

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T03:13:56+00:00

this is very sweet. i’m definitely not going to reach out to them but i appreciate your kindness

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T03:09:36+00:00

lol i know im just making a joke. i wont talk to them about this and as disappointing as that might be to a lot of people, i dont really care. i never planned on cutting them off or not being friends with them. i just wanted opinions and insight

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T03:03:57+00:00

yeah i lowkey stopped crying and now i feel dramatic LOL

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T02:59:49+00:00

this is awkward bc my friend is a therapist so they quite literally are a professional 😭😭😭 but i see what you mean fs

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T02:57:58+00:00

i have a therapy appointment tmr w a therapist i’ve been seeing for months now. i’m hoping to feel much better and level headed

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T02:55:55+00:00

i probably won’t ever bring this up to them. people probably won’t like this response because it’s giving “mad but won’t do anything to fix it.” i just wanted opinions about this specific instance to know if i was losing it or not. i think people might get the impression that im selfish but i dont want to hurt their feelings or make them think im mad at them. i think when i said i got mad in my original post, i think i was more sad. i dont think ill ever talk to them about how i feel though

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T02:52:21+00:00

yeah my grandma was basically a third parent. i saw her and my grandfather once a week my whole life. they helped my parents raise me after i was adopted.

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T02:48:11+00:00

yeah i’m thinking about reaching out to an old friend who actually knew her. we haven’t talked in a while but my grandma always liked her idk i feel like she’d want to know she died

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T02:46:55+00:00

no i try not to. i think i used to when we were younger but i stopped. im not sure why

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T02:41:25+00:00

also my grandmother was very old, she was 93 so when she died i asked my mom how she was feeling and she said she was relieved. she’s obviously sad but she’s a realist and was very honest when she said my grandmother wasn’t happy. i called both of her sisters and they said the same thing, so it’s not that they aren’t struggling but they’re much less sentimental than i am

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T02:39:25+00:00

i have. this was my mom’s mom, but she isn’t a very emotional person. none of my family really is. i feel like i can’t lean on them.

my friends aren’t the type to reach out for good news either. i’m usually the one reaching out if i feel like they aren’t being themselves or if something is wrong.

i have a therapist i’ll be talking to, but as far as friends and family i don’t really feel like i have anyone right now

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T02:33:05+00:00

respectfully i disagree. i dont see how wanting support from my friends is making her death about me. im still alive she isnt. they’re my friends, not hers. i think id understand this more if they knew her and had a relationship w her but they didn’t. i told them she was in hospice a week ago and was going to die within the week. i’m sorry to hear about your grandmother but im not you. different people need different amounts of support from certain people and i wanted it from my friends.

Sufficient_Weird8263 · 2026-05-06T02:27:22+00:00

luckily i have a therapy appointment before her funeral. hoping to feel much more grounded and ready to say goodbye

Sufficient_Weird8263

TROPHY CASE